


Sinking Fast in the Rocky Waters

by almosthuman_butnotquite



Series: Jet Rush [1]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 3
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Injury, Leo's POV, M/M, Meddling, Skewed views of right and wrong, Slow Burn, Who can honestly tell anyways?, Withdrawal, cursing, not i
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-09
Updated: 2016-10-30
Packaged: 2018-05-12 21:10:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 27
Words: 45,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5680879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/almosthuman_butnotquite/pseuds/almosthuman_butnotquite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leo Stahl might have thought that no one knew about his addiction, and the very few who did never mentioned it to anyone. That was, until that kid from that vault asked about Church's patients and the good doctor spilled the beans. The kid had to want something from him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What's Been Lost

**Author's Note:**

> I will honestly probably be going back and rewriting... all of this. So stay tuned for updates and chapters that have been better written!

It would be a kind gesture if it came from someone he knew, but when the vault kid attempted to get him clean, Leo didn't appreciate it. What could he possibly want? He was already famous. Everyone knew him by that blue jumpsuit he always wore. There had to be something Leo had that the kid didn't.

The kid, who said his name was Thatchery, insisted he was doing it simply because he wanted to help him. Leo brushed him off and heard nothing more for the next week. He enjoyed the peace and spent most of it huffing Jet in the relative privacy of the Water Processing Plant. _Good riddance,_ he thought. _Kid's nothing but a nuisance._

Eventually, word started to get around Megaton that the vault kid was trying to help out some unfortunate junkie. They heard the latter huffed Jet, but no one knew who it could be. Some said it was just someone visiting the town for a little while. Some said that it was someone in their own little town, that they didn't all know each other as well as they thought they did. That caused an uproar. An uproar that Sheriff Simms had to detain four people for overnight. Doc Church and Moriarty said nothing about it being him, but Leo knew that Moriarty would eventually ask for a favor in exchange for his silence.

"We need to talk, Leo," Thatchery said one morning at the Lantern.

Leo turned his head to look at him and he blinked hard to focus his eyes. "What is this about?"

Thatchery gave him a stern look. "Don't make me say it aloud." This earned him a suspicious look from the woman sitting on the stool next to him.

Leo shook his head and pushed away from the wall behind himself. "Unless it's about getting you more food," he said, "I'm not interested in _gossiping_ with you." He knew damn well what it was about, even as high as he was, and he didn't want to talk about it. Or worse, get help from some punk kid who didn't know anything about why he did it. This vaultie didn't know him. He never would.

Thatchery sighed and leaned forward. "What if I wanted to talk about something else?"

"You and I both know you don't. That's all you ever talk to me about." Thatchery didn't look like he was about to back down. He opened his mouth to say something else. Leo huffed and said, "Meet me here after closing, kid." He really didn't want to hear anything else. His high was ruined enough.

Thatchery grinned and left the Lantern. Leo found a nice tip beside Thatchery's empty plate. _He has to want something,_ Leo thought as he pocketed the caps.  
~  
Thatchery was waiting outside of the Lantern when Leo left for the night. He had his hands deep in his pockets and the pendant of his necklace in his mouth. He was spaced out, silent where he leaned against the wall. When he finally saw Leo, he quickly pulled the pendant out of his mouth. The cap from a Quantum dangled on a leather cord.

"Hey."

Leo grunted in reply and started for the Water Processing Plant. He took the long way, past the bomb and the "church" and up the walkway that led past the armory. Thatchery struggled to keep up with his long strides, so he stopped at the top of the walkway to wait for him.

"Why are you avoiding this?" Thatchery managed when he caught up to him. He bent over, hands on his knees, wheezing. "Slow down, please. Your legs are infinitely longer than mine."

Leo looked down at his own legs and he crinkled his nose. They were not that long. He looked back at Thatchery. "Maybe you've just got bad genes."

Thatchery lifted his head to glare at Leo. "Maybe you're abnormally tall."

Leo started walking again, and Thatchery kept up easily with his shorter strides. He didn't say anything else, but Thatchery cleared his throat. Great. Another lecture. Another questionnaire about why he huffed Jet.

"So, about this little problem." He shook his head. "No, not little. It's pretty big."

"Get to the point." Leo's patience was already stretching thin and Thatchery had hardly even poked at the surface.

"Well, it's pretty bad, right? I mean, I've noticed how detached you are at the Lantern." He paused. "Do Jenny and Andy know?"

Leo bit his tongue hard and shoved his shaking hands deep into his pockets. They passed Craterside, the light from the window on the door throwing dim light across the metal walkway. Moira was probably sweeping up or working on another experiment.

"They don't," he bit out eventually.

Thatchery only hummed in response and pushed open the door to the Water Processing Plant. Leo sighed and dragged a hand over his face. This conversation was far from over.

"How long?"

Leo didn't remember. So he shrugged. "I don't know. Years. Couldn't give you a number." He would remember when his mind wasn't foggy anymore. But Thatchery didn't need to know.

Thatchery said nothing, but his shoulders were stiff. Leo didn't understand this kid, why he cared. He perched on the edge of the desk at the back and fiddled with his Pip-Boy instead of saying anything. Leo sat at the chair and twiddled his thumbs.

Thatchery smacked his hand away when he reached to unlock the top drawer of the desk. "At least hear me out," he said, and he didn't sound amused.

Leo sighed and leaned back. "I'm listening."

"Do you know what Jet does?" He didn't wait for an answer. Leo didn't know anyways, not besides giving him the feeling of being faster than anything else. "It deteriorates brain cells and damages vital organs. It kills you from the inside out and it's painful." He sighed and pushed his hands through his thick blond curls. "I've seen it happen and it's not pretty."

"Why do you care what happens to me? You hardly know me."

Thatchery's eyes narrowed when they met his. "Because everyone should have someone who stops them from doing stupid shit. You apparently don't."

"You think you're the first that's tried?"

"I think I'll be the first to succeed." He opened the desk and took every last inhaler and syringe and pill. "I'll see you tomorrow, Leo."

Leo couldn't believe this kid. Who the fuck did he think he was?


	2. Wake Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thatchery just smiled broad and leaned forward. "It's for your own good." He pulled something from his pocket and pressed it into Leo's palm. "Can I get a Nuka-Cola and squirrel bits?" he asked. His eyes flickered to the door and back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hate the chapter titles, but I'm only so creative.

Thatchery made good on the promise of seeing Leo the next day.

It was the late morning when he finally showed up at the Lantern. His blond curls were pinned back out of his face with a variety of bobby pins, and the hair at the back of his head was pulled back in a small ponytail. There was a dog trailing him, sniffing at everything it came upon, its tail wagging the entire time.

"Hey there," he said as he took a seat at the counter.

Leo gripped the counter hard to try and stop his hands from shaking. His voice was strained when he asked, "What can I get you?"

"Why so tense, Leo?"

"You asshole, you know why."

Thatchery just smiled broad and leaned forward. "It's for your own good." He pulled something from his pocket and pressed it into Leo's palm. "Can I get a Nuka-Cola and squirrel bits?" he asked. His eyes flickered to the door and back.

Leo headed inside and into the privacy of the house behind the restaurant, shutting the door to keep Andy from seeing. It was an inhaler labeled **ADDICTOL** in thick black letters, and he swore. It was expensive medicine. He pulled the rubber cap off and inhaled the contents quickly, gasping as it flooded his system and soothed his shaking nerves.

He loitered for a while, let the medicine take effect. He tucked the empty inhaler into his pocket before he went back into the restaurant area. He collected what Thatchery had ordered and he returned to the outside counter.

"Better?" Thatchery asked.

Leo set his order down in front of him. "That was expensive, you know," he muttered.

"I know very well how much it was. It was no problem, Leo." The dog whined at his feet for a scrap and he held out a chunk of squirrel. "I just want to help."

"Why?"

Thatchery lifted a shoulder in a shrug as he pushed the cap from his cola bottle across the counter. "I just do. I see someone who needs help, and I want to help them. I don't think I need a reason for it, not beyond that."

Leo glanced around and noted with a sigh of relief that no one was paying any attention to them. "What do you want? Caps?"

Thatchery raised his eyes and chuckled when he saw Leo's expression. He shook his head and drank from the Nuka-Cola. "I don't want anything from you, not like that. I just want you to stop doing..." He gestured wildly for a moment. "This."

Leo wanted to ask more, about why Thatchery cared so much, why he felt like he should help, but Jericho sidled up to the counter.

"Hey Leo," he called, "where's that pretty sister of yours?"

Leo didn't even notice Thatchery leave him a nice tip with his hands full dealing with Jericho. But it was there, beside the cap from the cola that Thatchery had taken with him.  
~  
Thatchery was there when he got off of work. He followed him wordlessly to the Water Processing Plant, his hands in his pockets and his mind somewhere else. They didn't speak, which was fine with Leo. He didn't want to talk about anything.

The Water Processing Plant was quiet. Walter was outside smoking. He greeted them when they approached. He never asked why Leo went there at night and Leo never wanted to say why. Walter mostly left him alone and minded his own business.

Thatchery leaned against the desk and looked at his Pip-Boy, turning dials and pressing buttons and ultimately ignoring him. Leo watched him from the doorway, arms folded as he leaned against the doorframe. What could he possibly want? Leo didn't have anything to give him. He supposed he could hook him up with a discount, give him free food even, as long as he didn't go over board. He didn't want Andy to get suspicious.

The kid didn't look up when he finally asked, "Did the Addictol help?"

Leo ignored the question in favor of asking one of his own. "Why are you so intent on helping me? We aren't friends."

Thatchery shrugged. "Maybe I want to be friends. Or maybe I just want to help."

Leo was getting tired of hearing that. He wanted the truth, but Thatchery wanted to play games with him. "Why though? What reason could you have to care? You seem to have bigger problems than I do."

Thatchery sighed, deep and long, and he pinched the bridge of his nose. He was finally starting to understand how Leo felt. "Maybe I want something to distract me, or I need a break. I don't know, Leo. Just let me help you. You can do that, right?"

He shook his head. "I don't want it."

"You don't have a choice. I want to help, and I always get what I want." He pulled something out of his pocket and tossed it to Leo. He barely caught it before it hit the floor. "Take this tomorrow, when the shaking sets in again. Probably best if you do before work. I'll be by for breakfast."

Leo watched him hop off of the desk. He stopped Thatchery before he reached the door by grabbing his arm. Thatchery's dark eyes narrowed at his hand. "That's it? You're not going to say a goddamn thing?"

Thatchery shook his head. A couple of curls came loose from the bobby pins. "I told you everything I wanted to. Maybe if you're patient, I'll tell you why I care so damn much."

Leo sighed and rubbed his eyes. He was exhausted and he already missed the Jet, but a trader wasn't scheduled in until next week and Church wouldn't give him anything. "Fine, go."

Thatchery did, lighting up a cigarette on his way out the door. Leo was frustrated and he wanted more than ever to take a hit of Jet, to hold it behind his teeth until it burned up his lungs and the world slowed to damn near a stop.


	3. Come With Me Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He thought that maybe Thatchery was starting to enjoy his company, as weird as that sounded. He didn't like being sober much.

A week came and went. It was full of the same frustration that Leo constantly felt. They continued in the same circles, Leo asking questions and Thatchery avoiding them with questions of his own. The caravan came in on Saturday, the day Andy gave him off of work, but Thatchery monitored him like a goddamn deathclaw stalking its dinner. Leo was beginning to feel like a disobedient child.

The caravan belonged to Doc Hoff, because of course he came in time to have been able to resupply Leo's stash of chems. But Thatchery had confiscated that and replaced it with Addictol, a dose every two days to ease him out of withdrawal and into permanent sobriety. His skin itched and his eyes hurt. Sobriety was a festering wound and he didn't have the medication to treat it properly.

Thatchery tried to distract him with his dog, who was more than eager to play with a wagging tail and lolling tongue, barking at him and chasing the baseball he threw. Thatchery watched them, smoked a cigarette, and eventually wrestled the dog for the ball. Leo could have left, snuck past him out the gates, but he knew he would get his ass kicked. Thatchery had given him a huge bruise on his arm three days ago when he found out Leo had tried to stop the treatments on his own.

"So," Thatchery began, holding his dog in his arms. It licked at his ear and he shifted it to stop it. He was stronger than he looked. "Do you want to take a walk with me outside?"

Leo perked up. He knew Thatchery probably wouldn't let him near Doc Hoff, but maybe getting outside of Megaton would make his skin stop itching. "Yeah, sure."

Thatchery set the dog down on the corrugated metal walkway and he headed for the front door of his house. Leo followed him inside. The dog raced in front of him. He thought they were going outside the gates, but Thatchery had gone straight up the stairs to the second floor of his house.

"Thatchery?" he called up. The dog was whining and barking at his feet. He didn't remember what Thatchery had called it. "I thought we were going outside?"

Thatchery reappeared at the top of the stairs with a rifle slung over his shoulder and a laser pistol in his hands. He was checking to make sure it was able to properly fire. "We are. We're not going far, but I think it'd be best to take some protection."

Leo eyed the rifle. It looked expensive or stolen from the Brotherhood of Steel, and it was almost as big as Thatchery was. "Why?"

Thatchery reassembled the pistol with ease. "There's raiders holed up near where we're headed. I don't think we'll have any trouble, but I have found a couple wandering in the nearby neighborhood." He descended the stairs and held the pistol out to Leo by the receiver so that Leo could take it by the grip. "You know how to use a laser pistol?"

Leo took it and the energy cells he was handed. "It's been a while, but I remember how."

"Good. It was either that or an assault rifle that I don't have enough ammo for." He clapped Leo on the shoulder as he passed him on the stairs and he looked around for his dog. He whistled sharply and the dog lifted its head from a wooden bin, purple juice smeared across its nose and snout. "Dogmeat, that's not for you."

Leo didn't know what the appropriate response was to Thatchery calling the mutt 'Dogmeat'. How could he forget that name? He wondered how the dog had even earned a name that outrageous.

Thatchery knelt in front of Dogmeat and started wiping the purple from its face with a rag from his pocket. "Silly duck," he cooed and Dogmeat's large pink tongue licked at Thatchery's nose. "You can't have mutfruit, silly duck. They make you gassy." Dogmeat yipped excitedly and Thatchery laughed. He scratched Dogmeat behind the ears before he stood up. "You ready to go?"

Leo's grip tightened on the pistol in his hand. He thought that maybe Thatchery was starting to enjoy his company, as weird as that sounded. He didn't like being sober much. "Yeah."  
~  
The Wasteland wasn't as horrible as he thought it was going to be, as he remembered it. But there wasn't anything out there, all empty desert and a nice breeze that provided some relief from the heat. It was... discomforting in a way — the silence, the absence of life — that settled in Leo's chest and seized his heart with a little bit of irrational fear.

Thatchery was light on his feet as he moved quietly through the skeletons of the old world's houses. He picked through footlockers and cupboards, but he didn't find anything of real value. He didn't talk but he stuck close by Leo's side and tried to keep an eye on Dogmeat. He seemed distracted.

"You're distracted."

Thatchery's eyes flicked to his face for a moment and he snorted. "Yeah, I have a lot of things on my mind." He elbowed Leo playfully. "You worried?"

Leo shrugged and pretended to be interested in watching Dogmeat sniff at a tin can. "Just a little bit."

Thatchery didn't press him for any sort of explanation. Leo really didn't have one. He looked idly inside mailboxes and stuffed old magazines and cherry bombs into the pockets of his jumpsuit. "How are the treatments?" he asked slowly.

Leo glanced at him. "I'm constantly itchy."

Thatchery laughed and looked up at him. "Yeah, that happens. It might be worse for you, because the inhaler is kinda like Jet."

"How... How do you know?"

Thatchery sputtered for a moment and his cheeks burned pink. "W-Well, I'm... My dad was a doctor, so I... I've seen it." It sounded almost like a question. He was looking in the mailboxes like they were the most interesting things he'd seen in this world.

Leo didn't press him further either, but that didn't mean he believed Thatchery was being completely honest with him. "Thanks." He felt Thatchery's eyes on him. "For the treatments, I mean." Oh, and now he was thanking this kid? Sobriety was not as good as he remembered it.

Thatchery shook his head. "It's nothing. I've got caps to spare, even after the last dosage is payed."

"I guess being the Waste's Savior has its perks, huh?"

Thatchery shrugged and kicked a small chunk of concrete. It skittered across the broken asphalt of the old world's street and landed in a puddle of stale water from the rain a couple of days ago. The sky was clear now without a cloud in sight.

"Yeah, but I don't... It's weird being called that. I used to just be a kid who lived underground, playing baseball and trying to get my childhood bully to fuck off while my dad pressured me to keep the overseer happy or some bad shit would go down. I never wanted to come up here and give all that up."

"Baseball?"

Thatchery laughed again. He did that constantly, Leo noticed, like he wasn't sure what other response to give. "It's a game, like a sport. They played it all over before the war. There's bases, and the pitcher guy throws a baseball at you." He made a circle with his hands. "A baseball is about this big and faster than shit. And you have to hit it with a bat, and depending on how hard you hit it and how far it goes, you run the bases." He stuck his hands in his pocket. "We had one earlier with Dogmeat."

Leo frowned. "I don't think anyone up here knows what that is."

"I ain't gonna lie, it wasn't too terribly great." He gestured to his nose where the bridge was crooked. "I got hit with a baseball, and let me tell you, those things hurt like hell. It broke my nose and I was too scared to go to my dad, so I set it myself in the bathroom. He still knew, though."

"Is he still down there?"

Thatchery cleared his throat. "That's a little complicated."

Leo hit a nerve, he just knew it. "Shit, I didn't—"

"Hey man, it's fine. He's at the Jefferson Memorial right now." He rubbed his eyes. "He's six feet under, but he's there."

Leo sighed heavily, just an exhale through his nostrils, and he tapped Thatchery's shoulder lightly. He wasn't really aware of his hands. "I'm sorry, about your dad."

"It... It wasn't your fault, man. He died for science."

"Science?"

"There was a project he was working on, why he left the vault. It was my mother's dream for the Wasteland to have clean water and I guess he felt obligated for that dream to come true." He shifted his rifle. "He was an idiot. But I miss him."

They fell silent as they followed Dogmeat through the destroyed neighborhood. Leo wasn't sure why Thatchery brought him out here, but he enjoyed the time away from Megaton, away from the Lantern. At least Andy couldn't ask him why he was shaking so much. Thatchery apparently couldn't stand silence, or something was up with the elementary school that was up ahead, or maybe both, because he turned in the middle of the road and stopped Leo. Dogmeat stopped too when Thatchery whistled at him. His ears stuck up in the air like soft velvet triangles trying to float away from his head.

"There's raiders in that school. We should turn back."

Leo looked up at the school, at the people moving around inside. "Okay..." Why did Thatchery ask him to go outside Megaton if they were just going to go back after a few minutes anyway?

The walk back was shorter than the walk out, maybe because they had already looked through the debris for anything of value. He tried to hand the pistol back at the gates, but Thatchery shook his head and told him to keep it. They earned an odd look from Simms when they went inside, but Thatchery ignored it in favor of heading down into the crater.

Leo was still confused. He didn't follow Thatchery. "What was the point of that?"

Thatchery stopped and turned to look up at him. "To get you out of town. Staying in one place for too long isn't good for anyone."

Leo met him at the bottom of the crater. He glanced around before pulling Thatchery into a hug. It was kind of awkward, and Thatchery's arms were pressed between them, but Thatchery didn't try to push him away. He patted Leo's shoulder when they pulled apart and he smiled at him. Leo wasn't sure why he'd hugged Thatchery, but he wasn't sure why his chest felt tight when Thatchery's eyes met his either.

"You want some dinner?" Thatchery asked.

It was still early but Leo could eat. Food didn't sound too bad.


	4. I'm Trying

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _He's too young for this,_ Leo thought. _Too damn young for the weight of the world on his shoulders._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Addictol is like a one dose thing and **BAM!** you're cured, but since it's a much longer process than that, I dragged it out, made it to where it's a process to get clean. It just makes more sense.

The treatments were hard. They got easier the more he used them, but he shook constantly and the pain that hit when the medication wore off was damn near unbearable. The Addictol numbed him and helped flush the drugs out of his system but the inhaler was too much like Jet. He missed the high, the buzzing along his nerves and how slow the world seemed around him.

Thatchery continued to pay for Leo's treatments with his own caps. He did so with a sad smile and the explanation that Jenny and Andy shouldn't have to know until Leo was ready to tell them. Leo appreciated that, but he wouldn't say it. He didn't want to. He was afraid to, really. He was afraid of getting close to someone like Thatchery.

"So, are you feeling better?" Thatchery asked him one morning inside the Lantern. It had been a month and a half since he started Leo on the treatments. Leo had noticed him spending more and more time around the Lantern. Maybe his house being behind it up on the hill was the only reason he bothered to come down.

"Hurts when the meds wear off." He knew he sounded strained, and he was, both physically and mentally. He was tired.

Thatchery's fingers brushed his forearm. They were cold. "We should take another walk outside before November hits."

"I'd rather not." His hands were shaking so bad. Jenny thought he'd been cold, and her brow wrinkled in confusion because it was still October and still rather warm outside. "I think I should stay here."

"We could walk around town." Thatchery was trying to distract him. "I hear the kids who throw mutfruits aren't allowed to anymore."

"Maggie and Harden did that?"

"Well, just Maggie. And maybe I did once." He shook his head. "Not important. Come on, you need to get away from the Lantern more, and not just to the Water Processing Plant."

Leo rolled his eyes. "All right. After my shift, we'll go for a walk." He heaved a sigh. He had no patience to be stubborn. Maybe Thatchery was right. "So, are you gonna order something?"

"Just a cola, I think. I'm not particularly hungry."

Thatchery spent the rest of the day there, quiet and out of the way. He kept Leo company with small talk during slow hours and he offered to share his potato crisps around dinner. _He's good company,_ Leo thought as he listened to Thatchery's story about aliens. Thatchery asked if he wanted to hear a story once the dinner rush ended at 6:30, and since there was another hour and a half until his shift was over, he said sure. But aliens? It sounded like something out of a pre-war book.

"Is this story true?" Leo asked when Thatchery ended with the _daring_ escape he and the other captives had managed to pull off. He was resting his chin in his hand as he watched Thatchery flail and sputter.

"What? Of course it is!" He unzipped his jumpsuit and showed Leo a large burn scar on his left shoulder. He was loud. "I got this from those little guys! They have these laser weapons that are more advanced than the ones we have, and and... and their food are these tentacle things, and they have these syringes that are almost like Stims!"

Leo snorted and shook his head. "Maybe you didn't make it up, but it sounds pretty crazy." He moved around the counter to gather up dirty dishes left behind by those who had come in for dinner. "Do you have proof?"

"I have five of their blasters and a-at least six rifles at my house," he said. "I have more stuff too."

"I'll have to see them sometime."

"Yeah," Thatchery said softly. He checked his Pip-Boy. "Can't you just close up early? I don't think anyone else is coming by," he groaned.

Leo looked at his Pip-Boy when he held his wrist out to him. "Yeah, I guess so. If Andy gets upset, at least I won't be here for it."

He dumped the dirty dishes in the sink and wiped the counter down with a damp cloth. Thatchery watched him clean up, and when he got tired of watching him, he fiddled with his Pip-Boy. Leo swept up too and he considered doing the dishes, but he decided that those could wait until he got back. If Andy wanted to argue with him, so be it. He deserved to leave early. He worked damn hard and he hadn't been coming up short lately either.

"You coming?" Leo asked as he opened the door.

Thatchery hopped off of the stool and followed Leo out the door. He breathed deeply of the night air before he lit up a cigarette from the pack in his pocket. Leo moved behind the counter where Jenny was.

"You headin' out?"

"Yeah. No one else is going in."

Her eyes flickered to Thatchery, who was watching the few residents who were still lingering outside their homes while he smoked his cigarette. "Be careful, Leo."

"Why wouldn't I be careful?" He turned to see what she was looking at and he shook his head. "No, nothing's... Nothing's happening, Jenny. Just because you want me to find someone doesn't mean that someone is him."

"Oh yeah? I hope you're right, because if you're not, I am going to hold that over you."

Leo rolled his eyes. "I'm not wrong, Jen."

"All right, if you insist. I'll see you later, yeah?"

"Yeah." He nodded at Thatchery and they started across town, past the bomb in the center and up the walkway. Thatchery steered him away from their usual path. They went past the front of Moriarty's and past Billy Creel's house.

"So, are you ever going to tell me why you care so damn much?"

Thatchery sighed and shrugged as he kicked at a pebble. "I mean, maybe?" He caught the look Leo gave him and he groaned. "Oh, all right. I, uh... I used to be like you. I started on Jet because I'm fucking terrified of needles, but it wasn't what I thought I needed. So I moved onto Psycho, and I didn't know I'd fucked up until six months later when Willow found me passed out in the Mall. I guess I had overdosed."

Leo didn't really know what he should have said. He didn't know who Willow was either. There were a lot of things that crossed his mind, all at the same time. How long ago was this? Was Thatchery okay? Did he still do Psycho? Was he only helping Leo because he wanted to feel better about himself? Why was he doing drugs in the most dangerous area of the Wasteland? But he couldn't ask Thatchery any of those.

Instead, Leo settled on asking, "What happened?"

"Well, she said she carried me inside the museum and handed me off to Cerberus, who took me to Doc Barrows. I was unconscious for almost two weeks. They thought I wasn't going to wake up." He sighed and pushed a hand through his curls. He flicked his cigarette away. "When I woke up, I was in so much pain that the first thing I did was vomit. They hadn't even started me on detox yet."

Thatchery fell silent for a little while. They went past Jericho's house, and then Thatchery's, and then past the Simms' house. Finally, Thatchery sighed and pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes. They stopped walking then. Leo wasn't sure what to do when he realized that Thatchery was fucking _crying_.

"I don't think you realize how bad I fucked up." He inhaled sharply through his nose to try and clear his sinuses. His voice didn't sound like his own anymore, too clogged with tears and anger. "God, I was covered in my own vomit and piss when Willow found me. No one even knows how fucking long I was there."

Leo swallowed hard. He didn't know what he was supposed to say to that. So he didn't say anything. But he did put a hand on Thatchery's shoulder to try and comfort him. Thatchery leaned into his touch. His chest heaved as he tried to stop crying.

"Shit, I'm sorry," Thatchery said as he wiped his face on his sleeve. "I just don't talk about this shit. Guess the wound hasn't healed yet..."

Leo wasn't sure if it was a good thing that Thatchery opened up about it to him or if it was a bad thing. "Did talking about it help?"

Thatchery shrugged and breathed deep through his nose. "I guess, yeah. I also think you should take something away from what I said. Moral of the story is chems are probably the worst decision you could make. One of. I don't know."

Leo was silent this time. He thought about what Thatchery told him, about the detox he must have gone through. "Is this why you're paying for my medicine?"

Thatchery made a face and produced his cigarettes and lighter again. "I didn't get the good stuff. I was in constant pain, even with the shit medicine Barrows had me on. I think it was experimental. Or he was observing me. Or both, if you're pessimistic." He lit his cigarette and took a deep drag. His nose and eyes were pink in the pale moonlight. "You want one?"

"Sure, yeah."

Leo let Thatchery light it for him and they smoked in silence, leaning against the wall to Craterside Supply. Leo thought about what Thatchery said. He sighed when he snuffed out his cigarette butt underneath his boot. Thatchery glanced at him and he cleared his throat.

"Thanks, kid." He shoved his hands into his pockets. "For everything, I guess."

Thatchery smiled and flicked his own cigarette away as he pushed off of the wall. "What are friends for?"

Leo walked him to the front door of his house then. He didn't miss the stiffness in Thatchery's shoulders. His eyes were so tired when he bid Leo goodnight. _He's too young for this,_ Leo thought. _Too damn young for the weight of the world on his shoulders._


	5. Stretched Thin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenny smiled. "You're looking better. Have been. I don't know what it was, but you looked sick for _years_." Her eyes narrowed just a little but the smile didn't fade one bit. "It's Thatchery, isn't it?"
> 
> Leo coughed into his arm and pretended to busy himself gathering up empty beer bottles. "I mean, yeah, I guess." He dumped the bottles into the trash bin and wiped the counter down again. "Don't give me that goddamn look, Jen. Nothing's happening."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm proud of this one. I just really like the way it turned out. I'm trying to show developments in both of them, so I hope that's noticeable.
> 
> Also, I don't really know how alcohol works. I've never had enough to be more than buzzed and I can't be bothered with research.

Leo became worried when Thatchery hadn't shown up all morning. When two o'clock rolled around, he decided to go check on him. He didn't tell Andy he was leaving the restaurant unattended. Jenny didn't ask either. He had a thought that she suspected something between them. She was bored too often.

Leo was worried even now that he saw Thatchery sprawled on his couch, Dogmeat on his chest and an empty bottle of vodka on the table. He looked like he was going to pass out and like he was going to puke at the same time. Leo hoped he only passed out, if he was going to do anything at all.

"Kid?"

Thatchery didn't look at him as he grumbled, "M'not a kid..."

Leo almost groaned out loud. "Are you drunk?"

Thatchery laughed so hysterically that Dogmeat stuck its snout into Thatchery's mouth just to shut him up. Thatchery made a retching noise and pushed Dogmeat back. "Bad Dogmeat. Bad boy." Dogmeat licked at his face and he laughed, a little more humanly this time.

Leo watched Dogmeat's tail wag. He felt sick seeing Thatchery like this. "You know it's only two in the afternoon, right?"

Thatchery fumbled for his Pip-Boy on the table beside him and he frowned at the screen. Dogmeat tucked his head against the side of Thatchery's neck. "Shit." He covered his eyes with a hand. "It wasn't when I started," he whined, like a petulant child.

Leo could only guess that Thatchery had started drinking sometime after midnight and he probably passed out at some point. He shooed Dogmeat off of the couch. He tried not think about why Thatchery was drinking. "Go up to bed. You might hurt yourself if you stay on the couch."

Thatchery grumbled but he dragged himself up off of the couch. He took his Pip-Boy with him. "Come wake me up for dinner?"

"Sure thing." He waited until Thatchery's bedroom door closed before he left. Dogmeat followed him out and down to the Lantern. He decided it wasn't his problem and he let Dogmeat curl up at his feet behind the counter.  
~  
Jenny came inside sometime around seven o'clock, asking for a cigarette. Leo handed her one from the pack in his pocket and she smiled sweetly at him. Something was up.

"So, I saw you head up to his house." She glanced down when Dogmeat sniffed at her pant leg. "Did he follow you down?"

"Yeah. I sent Thatchery up to bed and he locked his dog out. I couldn't leave him alone with the robot." He wiped the counter down for what seemed like the third time in an hour. His hands were sort of doing their own thing. "Have you seen Andy? He wasn't here when I got back."

She shrugged and flicked ash into a nearby ashtray even though it was full. "He went for a walk a couple minutes after you left. He didn't say where, but I hope he's not headed to Moriarty's again."

"No amount of words will convince either of them to get their heads out of their asses." A hand landed on his arm and he looked into Jenny's dark eyes. "Is everything all right, Jen?"

Jenny smiled. "You're looking better. Have been. I don't know what it was, but you looked sick for _years_." Her eyes narrowed just a little but the smile didn't fade one bit. "It's Thatchery, isn't it?"

Leo coughed into his arm and pretended to busy himself gathering up empty beer bottles. "I mean, yeah, I guess." He dumped the bottles into the trash bin and wiped the counter down again. "Don't give me that goddamn look, Jen. Nothing's happening." 

"You didn't tuck him into bed just now?"

Leo rolled his eyes. "No. I told him to go to bed because he was drunk. I stayed downstairs while he went up." He glanced at the clock. "Speaking of, I need to go get him up." 

Jenny snorted. "You're not his mother." 

"He asked me to go get him up for dinner." He squeezed her shoulder as he passed. Dogmeat stayed curled up behind the counter. 

Thatchery's house was mostly dark and silent when Leo went inside. The Mister Handy must have been upstairs in the locked spare room. A quick listen at the door made him think maybe Thatchery deactivated it for the night. Maybe it pestered him when he drank. 

Thatchery was asleep in the bed, his back to the door, and he was snoring quietly. His back was covered in freckles and scars, his curls tumbled over his shoulders. Leo almost didn't want to wake him. 

Leo gently shook him. He marveled at how soft his skin was beneath his palm. "Thatchery," he whispered. "Hey, it's almost seven." 

Thatchery rolled over and yawned. His teeth were so white. That vault must have taught good hygiene habits. Thatchery's chest was just as freckled and scarred as his back. Leo didn't want to know why his throat tightened, why his heart thundered in his chest. "What time?" 

Leo swallowed. "A-Almost seven. Did you want dinner?" 

Thatchery rubbed an eye. "Yeah. M'starving." 

Leo waited outside when Thatchery asked him to. He had to dress if he was going outside, and his clothes were lying across the back of the chair at his desk. While he waited, Leo thought about Thatchery's skin, about the pink scars. When he caught himself, he forced himself to think about mole rats and feral dogs until Thatchery emerged from his room. He was still half asleep and his clothes were rumpled, but he smiled bright at Leo. 

"Hey." 

Leo smiled. "Hey. You sleep all right?" 

Thatchery yawned again and nodded. "Could use more, but my stomach is angry at me for ignoring it. The last time I ate was yesterday." 

They walked together in silence to the Lantern. The stars were bright in the sky where they weren't blotted out by clouds, and Megaton's lights were dim enough that the moon provided most of the light. Leo glanced at Thatchery outside of the Lantern. He looked exhausted and deep in thought. He didn't say anything. He didn't even look at Leo. 

Thatchery was silent even after Leo brought him a bowl of stew. He didn't eat right away. He sloshed the chunks of potato around, his chin in his palm, and sighed heavily. 

"I thought you were hungry?" Leo asked as he washed the dishes leftover from the dinner rush. 

Thatchery let his spoon fall into the bowl and he shrugged halfheartedly. "I am, but I can't eat." He scrubbed a hand over his face. "I've been thinking for a while..." 

Leo prodded him when he fell silent. "About?" 

Thatchery made an odd noise at the back of his throat. "I was thinking about—" He cleared his throat. "About a promise I made to someone. I have to leave tomorrow. I don't know if I'll get back." 

Leo almost dropped the ceramic plate in his hands to the floor. "What?" 

"You've heard of Old Olney, right?" He didn't wait for an answer. "I made a promise to retrieve something, a family heirloom, from the vault up there. I've been putting it off for too long." 

Leo was incredulous, because this was just a _really_ horrible idea. Anyone with half a brain stayed away from there. There was a good reason to. "You know what's up there, right?" 

Thatchery nodded. "I've got plenty of Stealth Boys in my pack. I can take down one, maybe two deathclaws, but there's a whole nest." He leaned forward. "I like the idea even less than you do, but I don't like breaking my promises either." 

He didn't say anything, but he finished up the dishes. Thatchery was silent too. He finally started eating. Leo pretended to busy himself while Thatchery was eating by taking inventory and cleaning up the restaurant. Finally, after fifteen minutes, Thatchery pushed away his bowl, empty save for a little bit of broth. 

"Can I ask you something?" 

Leo glanced up at him before back at the floor, at the broom he was sweeping over the metal. "Yeah, sure." 

"Are you worried about me going up there?" 

He didn't immediately answer him. He finished sweeping and he wiped down the bar before he even looked Thatchery in the eye. "I am. You're my friend." The word felt foreign in his mouth. Had he ever had a friend? As long as he could remember, it was always just him and Jenny and Andy. He never had someone to call a friend. "Of course I'm worried." 

Thatchery smiled. "I'll be careful, Leo. I promise." 

Leo laughed and shook his head. The clock said it was almost eight o'clock. "I need to close up." 

Thatchery waited for him outside and smoked a cigarette while he did. He chatted idly with Jenny until Leo came outside. He was stuffing the inhaler of a detox dose into his pocket. 

"Hey," he said. 

Thatchery grinned at him and he flicked his cigarette butt away. "Hey." 

"You heading back up to bed?" Leo asked. 

"You'd better go tuck him in," Jenny teased. 

"Oh, ha ha," Leo said with a roll of his eyes. Thatchery was giggling. 

"Come on, it's getting late. You know I can't be out past curfew." 

Leo arched a brow at him. "I thought you didn't like being called a kid?" 

Thatchery snorted. His eyes were so bright in the dark town. "I actually have a sense of humor, unlike you." 

Jenny laughed and shooed them away. "Go on, go back to bed. You look exhausted." 

"I am." He squeezed Jenny's arm and started for the steps up to his house. "You coming Leo?" 

Leo walked with him to the front door of his house. Dogmeat followed them, his nose to the ground. Thatchery didn't say anything until they stopped in front of his door. 

"Hey," he said. His voice was oddly soft, and his fingers were cold against Leo's arm. Thatchery liked touching him. If he kept it up, Leo was going to think that he was starved for human contact. "I'll be back as soon as I can, all right?" 

"I'm worried about you being torn to shreds." 

Thatchery shook his head. "I can handle a couple of them. I took one down with just a ten mil and my bare hands." 

Leo remembered that story. Three Dog had made a broadcast some time ago about the kid from 101 taking down a deathclaw like an old world bullfighter. He had thought it impressive at the time, but now it was just foolish. Now that he actually cared about Thatchery. "That doesn't mean you'll be lucky enough to do it again." 

Thatchery scoffed but he didn't disagree. "I promise I'll be back." He pulled Leo to him to hug him. "I never break my promises," he mumbled against the shell of Leo's ear. 

He was inside before Leo could even think of what to say. 


	6. Wounds of the Saints

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thatchery was standing at the top of the stairs with fresh bandages, leaning on crutches that were almost too tall for someone his height. The white bandages looked weird against his skin, stark white in the dim room, and the stitches that closed the larger wounds made Leo's stomach lurch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, two works in one day. I'm proud of myself today. And the chapter title's pretty cool.
> 
> Guys, I want to thank y'all for reading this. The amount of hits I've gotten is pretty crazy. And a great motivator, honestly.

Thatchery hadn't been in town for the last week. He left one morning after breakfast with his dog at his side and his rifle strapped to his back. He promised he would be back as soon as he could, but it had been a week and Leo was worrying.

Jenny told him not to worry, that Thatchery could handle himself. They heard Three Dog's broadcasts about the things he was capable of doing. It didn't ease Leo's mind.

A small figure stumbled into town late one night, after Leo had closed up for the night. He was going to take a walk around town but something wasn't right about this person. They looked like they were going to fall over dead.

When Leo got closer, he heard a dog snarling. It was Dogmeat, so that meant...

"Thatchery," he breathed. Dogmeat stopped growling at the sound of his voice. He carefully curled an arm around his waist and helped him to the clinic. Dogmeat followed behind, whimpering at their heels. "Thatchery, what happened?"

"Raiders. S'nothing. I'm fine."

"You're hardly breathing," Leo argued.

Doc Church's voice echoed from his office. "Leo, I told you already, get your..." He trailed off when he saw Thatchery, bloody and wounded and using Leo to support all of his weight. "Bring him back here."

Church made him leave and made him take Dogmeat too. When the mutt didn't move, sitting by Thatchery's side and whining while he nuzzled at his hand, Leo picked him up and carried him outside. He took him to the Lantern and let him curl up onto his bed. He laid down beside him, because there wasn't much he could do, and waiting at the clinic seemed pointless.  
~  
Leo didn't eat breakfast before he headed to the clinic. He hardly even cleaned up. Dogmeat trotted beside him and he whimpered when Leo opened the door.

"Doc?"

Church came out of his office. Leo couldn't see Thatchery anywhere. "What do you want?"

"Can I see him?"

The doctor stared hard at him for a while. Leo recognized it as Church trying to see if he was high as a cloud or not. He must have decided that he wasn't because he waved him toward the closed door. "He's in there. Don't wake him."

Thatchery was already awake when Leo went inside. He was lying on the cot farthest from the door, a dirty sheet pulled up to his chest, and he was fiddling with his Pip-Boy. He didn't seem to notice Leo but he couldn't ignore Dogmeat's cold nose against his elbow.

"Hey boy," he murmured, scratching behind his ears.

"How you feeling?"

He looked up and smiled weakly at Leo. "The light hurts my eyes, but I'll be fine. Just flesh wounds."

"How did raiders get you?"

"You had to ask." He sat up and pushed a hand through his hair. The blanket pooled around his hips and Leo winced at the number of bandages he had. "The sun was already going down but I couldn't stop anywhere for the night. The closest place was the old school, but you and I know there's raiders in there. They found me and I tried to run back here. There were too many of them with guns."

Leo leaned against the wall. "Can I get you anything?"

"You can get me out of here."

"Did Church say you could?"

Thatchery shrugged and threw the sheets back. He wasn't wearing much, so Leo politely turned away. Thatchery dressed in his jumpsuit fairly quickly. He leaned against Leo when his legs almost gave out underneath him. Leo supported his weight as they snuck outside.

"Thanks, man." He had his head tucked against Leo's shoulder as he fumbled in his pockets for his cigarettes. "I hate the clinic. Reminds me of..." He trailed off as he placed a cigarette between his lips and lit it.

"Reminds you of what?"

Thatchery shook his head and blew the smoke away from Leo. "Nothin'."

Leo could understand that he didn't want to talk about things that hurt him. So he didn't press it. "Did you want to go home?"

"The Lantern. I don't want to listen to Wadsworth cluck over me like a fucking hen. It isn't my mother."

Right, Wadsworth was the Handy. "Why don't you just shut him down?"

"It's a lot of work for me. I'm not that great with science and shit like that." He pushed his curls back from his face. "I think I'll just stay here for a little while. Moving sort of hurts."

Leo settled him in the comfy chair in the corner and Dogmeat curled at his feet. Thatchery smiled gratefully. He played on his Pip-Boy when Leo started to go about opening up the Lantern. He was surprised when Leo set down a Nuka-Cola and a bowl of stew in front of him.

"Probably should eat. Keep your strength up," he said.

"Thanks."

He ate his food in silence and read something on his Pip-Boy. Dogmeat whined for scraps but Thatchery didn't give him anything. Leo could see why; the dog was fat despite the amount of time they spend outside Megaton. He didn't need any extra food.

Jenny came downstairs about ten minutes after Leo opened, brushing tangles from her hair with her fingers. She smiled at Leo and wrapped her arms around him in a hug.

"Hey, don't tell Andy, but I'm not charging Thatchery for his food today."

Jenny's brow furrowed. "You don't think he'll notice?"

"He can take the costs out of my pay if he does."

She glanced at Thatchery and her face scrunched up at the sight of all of the bandages he was wrapped in. "Is he going to be okay?"

"He was joking this morning, so I'd say yes."

"But is he okay now?"

Leo shrugged. "He hasn't said much since I helped him out of the clinic. He said it reminded him of something, but he got quiet and wouldn't say what."

"I'm sure he'll tell you when he's ready."

Leo didn't even realize what she was implying until she left.  
~  
Dogmeat nosed at Leo's hand and he scratched behind the mutt's ears. Thatchery was letting his Handy change his bandages upstairs. He had grumbled about it and snapped when Wadsworth began reprimanding him. His sharp voice carried down the stairs as he cursed at the bot.

Leo wasn't exactly sure why he was here. Thatchery had proven that he was more than capable of using crutches, once he had retrieved them from his house, so he didn't need to lean on Leo to get around. He didn't even need help to get up the stairs. But he asked.

Leo pressed the heels of his palms hard against his eyelids until he was seeing spots. He wished he could figure out the weird twisting feeling he'd felt in his gut earlier, when Thatchery refused to open up to him. What was that feeling? And what was so bad that he didn't want to talk about?

Maybe the fault laid with Leo. Maybe Thatchery just didn't trust him enough with something like this. Maybe he didn't want to open up to him. That was fine, Leo told himself. Why was he thinking so hard about this anyway?

"You look like you're the one poked full of holes."

Thatchery was standing at the top of the stairs with fresh bandages, leaning on crutches that were almost too tall for someone his height. The white bandages looked weird against his skin, stark white in the dim room, and the stitches that closed the larger wounds made Leo's stomach lurch.

Leo shook his head. "Just a... headache."

Thatchery started down the stairs. "You take your dose today?"

Leo didn't answer right away. He didn't, if he was going to be honest. He had been too busy worrying. "No."

Thatchery leaned heavily on the crutches once he got to the bottom of the stairs. "Do you have any left?"

"One, I think. At the Lantern." He thought for a moment. "I don't need it."

Thatchery didn't look like he believed him. "Yes, you do."

"I don't. I'm not... It doesn't hurt today. It doesn't feel like there's anything trying to claw it's way out." That was a lie. His heart was. He wished he could figure out why.

Thatchery scratched behind Dogmeat's ears when the mutt nosed at his thigh. "We'll go to Church tomorrow, have him see how many more doses you'll need."

Leo shook his head. "You don't have to."

"I do have to. I promised some... I promised I would help you."

"Who did you promise?"

Thatchery stared at the floor, pushing on the edge of a rug with his crutch. He was biting his lip. "Myself. My dad."

"Your dad?"

"I made a promise after I got clean that I'd help you. Not just you, either. Any junkie who'll listen." He rubbed his nose. "He didn't answer, of course. Kind of couldn't, six feet under like that."

"Is..." He cleared his throat. "Is that why you started?"

Thatchery nodded slowly. "Yeah. He was the only thing I knew outside of the vault. Only family I had too."

Leo didn't want to talk about this anymore. Thatchery looked like he might cry, or maybe break something. Or both. He hadn't exactly had the best day.

"Thanks for helping me," he said quietly.

The kid shrugged. "Don't sweat it, man. I don't mind it. I got caps to spare. Might as well spend them instead of let them collect dust."

Leo glanced at the clock on the wall by the stairs. It was getting late. "I should get home. Take care of yourself, Thatch."

Thatchery looked embarrassed where he was staring down at his socked feet. "Can you come get me for breakfast? I don't think I can make it down the stairs by myself..."

Leo smiled. "Sure thing. Get some sleep, kid."

He frowned at him, but Leo was gone before he could respond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapters are very slowly getting longer. I hope they don't seem like they drag out. Please tell me if they do. Gosh, I don't want to bore you guys.


	7. Divided

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He didn't want to think that Thatchery was using him for something. He wanted to think that maybe Thatchery wanted to be his friend, that maybe he didn't want anything but friendship in return. He was the only friend Leo had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is sort of a filler, but there's going to be good stuff next chapter, I promise.

Thatchery recovered slowly. He said it was because Stimpaks were expensive and he didn't want to use up all the ones he had. Leo had seen how many the kid actually had; it was enough to open up a clinic of his own, to use a Stimpak for every damn scrape he got. But they were his Stimpaks, so he could use them as he pleased. Not like he listened to Leo anyways.

"I hate crutches," Thatchery muttered.

He was limping down the stairs to the Lantern beside Leo, fresh bandages on his wounds. He finally used a Stimpak when some stitches opened up. The Stimpak pulled the wound shut but Thatchery had been complaining the entire time.

Leo glanced at him, the gauze wrapped around his bicep. Blood was already soaking through, pale pink against white. "Are you only refusing Stims because—"

"No," he snapped. "Of course not. What if I need them later? What if I run into a deathclaw?"

"You have four hundred of them, Thatchery." He stopped when Thatchery stopped. They were just outside the clinic. "You're sure it's not because of your fear? You did complain an awful lot when you had me inject you."

"That was..." Thatchery sighed and shook his head. "I'm not scared of them."

Leo glanced at the clinic door. "Do you want me to go get some more bandages for you?"

Thatchery held out a pouch of bottle caps. "Please?"

Leo took the caps and opened the door to the clinic. He cleared his throat when Doc Church didn't look up. The man was taking inventory on his medical supplies. He had a bandage on his hand, looped around his palm.

"What is it now, Leo?"

"I need to pick up more bandages for Thatchery."

"Is the kid blackmailing you into doing shit for him?"

"What? No." Why would Thatchery do that?

"He's a manipulator," Church said as he set about gathering the bandages and antiseptic. He would have to take inventory all over again.

"What happened to your hand?"

"Kid bit me when I stitched him up." He didn't seem to care about Leo's abrupt change in conversation. He put the supplies into a small box. "Did he send the caps?"

The pouch felt heavy in Leo's hands. "How... How much?"

"Seventy-six."

Leo took the bandages up to Thatchery's house for him and put them in the crate Thatchery pointed him to. He thought Thatchery should rest, or relent and let him give him another Stimpak injection, but Thatchery wanted to go for a walk. So they left the house, winding around past the houses of the other residents and past Moriarty's. Thatchery talked, aimlessly, about the weather and places he'd been.

"Why does there have to be raiders everywhere? They're even in the Super Duper Mart." He stopped to fidget with a bandage. "I went there to help Moira with her research. I was supposed to help her find food and medicine and I almost got my head blown off instead."

Leo shoved his hands into his pockets. "Why are you helping her with this?"

"I dunno. I'm bored, I guess. And it's kind of fun. I like field research." He sighed. "Maybe I should let you give me a Stim. I'm tired of these stupid crutches already."

"Are you being serious or are you just saying it?"

"I'm serious." His voice wavers, but he does look like he means it. "I fucking hate these crutches. I hate these bandages."

Leo nodded. "We'll go that way then, all right?"

"Yeah."

They ran into Leo's brother Andy while they were walking past the Water Processing Plant. Leo hadn't realized that Thatchery had never met Andy before. He also realized the second Thatchery introduced himself that maybe that wasn't a bad thing.

"Hey Andy," he said. His brother stopped. "What's up?"

"Just going for a walk." Andy's scowl deepened when he saw Thatchery. He had an immediate dislike of him before he even got a word out. "Who's this?"

"I'm Thatchery Higgins. I'm Leo's friend."

Andy didn't care. "And...?"

Leo sighed. "Andy, come on. Be nice."

"Why? He's just a kid."

"Hey!" Thatchery frowned. "This kid saved your ungrateful ass, man! I disarmed that stupid bomb! I could have rigged it to explode!"

Leo felt his face scrunch up. He could have what?

Andy didn't seem to care. He saw Thatchery as an annoying kid, not as any of the things Three Dog hailed him as. Leo wasn't sure which one was worse though. "Well, I should be so grateful, shouldn't I?"

Leo sighed. "Why do you have to be such an ass?"

Andy didn't answer. He walked right past them. It was an obvious dismissal, and that was fine. Andy was an ass anyways.

" _He's_ your brother?" Thatchery asked once they were out of earshot. "But you and Jenny are so nice."

"Andy... isn't much of a people person."

Thatchery started down the walkway again. "I could see that."

Leo held the door open to Thatchery's house for him. He watched him stare at the stairs for a moment before he sighed in defeat.

"You want help?" Leo asked.

Thatchery was silent for a little while. He tried to climb the stairs himself, but he gave up on the second step. "Get your ass over here and help me."

Leo took the crutches from him. He let Thatchery lean against him as they went up the stairs together. He sat Thatchery in the cushy pink chair by the small medical station and pulled out a few Stimpaks. Thatchery grimaced at the sight. Leo gently unwrapped the many bandages, and he uncapped one of the Stims.

"You okay?"

Thatchery didn't say anything, but he nodded.

Leo held his hand up. "You can hold my hand if you need to."

Thatchery huffed. "I'm not a kid," he said, but he took his offered hand anyways.

Leo didn't have a problem using the Stims with one hand. He didn't have a problem with getting the needle into Thatchery's skin. He didn't say anything about how Thatchery's grip tightened every time the needle sunk into his skin.

"There we go," Leo murmured. He withdrew the needle from Thatchery's arm. "That's the last one."

Thatchery released his hand as he sighed. "Thanks," he muttered, rubbing at one of the puncture wounds on his arm. He pushed himself up to stand and he grinned at Leo.

Leo smiled too. He helped Thatchery down the hall to his bedroom, where Thatchery pulled open desk drawers, looking for his cigarettes. Leo leaned against the doorframe. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

Thatchery glanced at him over his shoulder. "Uh, sure, yeah. What's up?"

"Church said I should stay away from you. Do you know why he'd say that?"

Thatchery sighed and leaned back against his desk. "Sometimes people don't like some of the things I do. But I've hardly been on the surface for a year. I'm just trying to do my best, what I think is right."

Leo was hesitant to ask, but he had to know. "Were you... ever actually considering blowing this place up?"

He shook his head, his eyes narrow. "No, of course not. You know I wouldn't do that." He frowned at him. "Are you okay? You've been acting... weird since this morning."

Leo hadn't wanted to ask him about what Church had said. He supposed that maybe it was because he didn't want to know if Thatchery really was a manipulator. Maybe he didn't want to know if Thatchery was using him for something. If he was, what for? Leo didn't have anything to give him. He didn't have caps or anything of value.

He didn't want to think Thatchery was using him for something. He wanted to think that maybe Thatchery wanted to be his friend, that maybe he didn't want anything but friendship in return. He was the only friend Leo has.

"Church said you're a manipulator..."

"I... I guess he's not wrong." Thatchery crossed his arms over his chest. "I'm good with words, and if i have to, I use them instead of my rifle or my fists. The way he said it makes it sounds bad."

"Why are you spending so much time with me?"

Thatchery's lips quirked to the side. "You don't want to be friends anymore or what?"

Leo shook his head. "It's not that."

"You think I want something from you?" He shook his head. "l don't want anything from you, Leo."

Leo was not sure if he should be relieved. Thatchery was looking at him with a smile on his face. He couldn't help but smile back. "You know, you might be one of my first friends."

"You're one of my first friends too. Not a whole lot of people would bother patching me up without expecting any caps in return." Thatchery moved closer. Leo could feel the warmth wafting off of him, could smell him. He smelled like dirt and soap, like the faint tang of blood. "Thanks for helping me, Leo. I appreciate that you care enough."

Leo shook his head, just the slightest movement. "You're my friend." He squeezed Thatchery's shoulder. "Get some sleep, Thatch."

Thatchery looked like he could use some sleep.


	8. Uranium Fever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The sun finally gave way to stars that shine bright overhead, too many twinkling lights to count, but Leo wasn't looking at them. He was looking at the bomb, and occasionally at Thatchery out of the corner of his eye. Thatchery glowed green, just a little bit, his nose and lips and ears bright. Leo's arm prickle a little bit with radiation because of how close they were sitting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a long one, and probably the only one with a title that makes sense. Sorry guys.

Leo had been hearing things thrown around all morning. People were saying that Thatchery was doing something stupid. That he was been helping Moira Brown with some more of her crazy, unwanted experiments.

Leo was expecting to hear about explosions going off around town, or that Sheriff Simms throttled Thatchery for causing trouble. He wasn't expecting Thatchery to stumble into the Lantern in the late morning looking very sick.

Thatchery looked like he hadn't slept in _days_ , and his skin had a greenish glow to it. He looked like he might even throw up. What had he been doing for the last week?

"Holy shit, are you okay?"

Thatchery waved a hand at him. "I'm fine. Just a little tired."

Leo shook his head. "You need RadAway."

"Geiger only says three eighty-five." He leaned against the wall. "Can I have a Nuka-Cola?"

Leo gestured to the blue armchair in the corner. "You can sit your ass down."

Thatchery sat in the armchair and rubbed his eyes. "I don't need RadAway."

"Why not?"

"Research."

Research? "It's Moira, isn't it?"

Thatchery nodded. "She's working on a Survival Guide. She needs this information."

"So she asked you to irradiate yourself?" He didn't understand. What sort of research was this?

"She said she only needed two hundred, but if I was willing to contract more, it would help her research a lot more." He swallowed hard. "I'm shooting for six."

"You aren't afraid of mutations?"

Thatchery shook his head. "I'm lucky. If anything, the mutations'll be benign." He coughed into the crook of his arm. "Come on, Nuka-Cola. I promised I'd help her out."

Against his better judgement, Leo pressed an ice cold Nuka-Cola Quantum into Thatchery's open palm. He watched Thatchery uncap it and drink from the bottle like a man dying from thirst. He sputtered when he put the bottle down, coughing and wheezing as his skin glowed an ugly green color. Leo couldn't see his freckles anymore, and his skin had lost its normal color. He could hear the Geiger counter on Thatchery's Pip-Boy ticking angrily at him.

"This is ridiculous," he muttered.

Thatchery pushed the cap towards Leo. "It's for science, Leo. Science, and the betterment of mankind."

"It's going to kill you. Six hundred rads? You've lost your mind."

"If I've lost anything, it's feeling in my toes. I'm still perfectly sane."

Leo leaned over the table. He could feel radiation wafting off of Thatchery, little pinpricks of radiation washing over his skin. He ignored it. "Thatchery, you're _glowing_. That is not healthy."

"Science isn't healthy." He chugged a third of the remaining blue soda like he was trying to prove his point. "I get it, you're worried, but I know what I'm doing. I know my body's limits."

"Yeah? I bet you can't even walk without help."

Thatchery ran his tongue over his teeth. "Twenty caps?" he asked, holding his hand out.

Leo shook it. Thatchery stood, leaning heavily on the table. He hardly took one step before his knees buckle. He barely caught himself with a hand on the corner of the table.

"Okay, okay," he said as he sat back down in the chair. "So I can't walk. But I can't give up. I'm more than halfway there."

Leo sighed and moved away. "Let me know when you're going to leave so I can help you."

Thatchery chuckled. "I know you think I'm a dumbass. And yeah, I am."

"You know, you might lose a couple of fingers like this," he muttered as he wiped down the counter.

Thatchery rolled his eyes. "But thanks for offering to help me, Leo."

Leo frowned at the weird feeling in his gut. He didn't know why it's doing that, but it had been happening more often. "Yeah," he said, ducking his head. "Yeah, no problem, Thatch."

"Hey, how's the uh..." Thatchery waved a hand around. "The treatments?"

Leo glanced up at him before refocusing on scrubbing away a stubborn spot. "Took my last dose this morning, actually." He didn't miss the way Thatchery grinned. "Thanks again. It was hard, but I'm glad you helped."

"I'm glad you're over it. And you wanted to figure it out yourself."

"I was the one who got myself into it."

Thatchery shrugged and he lifted the bottle of Quantum to his lips. "Have you told Jenny and Andy yet?"

Leo grunted and ignored the question. He started gathering up the empty bottles and dirty utensils that were scattered around from breakfast. He was well aware of Thatchery's eyes following him, and he knew Thatchery would try and force an answer out of him if he was able to stand on his own.

"Why not?" Thatchery prodded finally. He had probably realized that staring at Leo wasn't going to give him an answer.

"It... hasn't come up."

Thatchery scoffed. "You think something like that is just going to come up? Nothing like that comes up in normal conversation, Leo. You just have to sit them both down after work one day and tell them."

"Is that how you'd do it?"

Thatchery sighed. "Look, I know it's scary and something you would rather not do, but they have to know. It'll eat you up if you keep it a secret."

Leo rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. "I... I owe it to them, huh?"

"Hey, come here." He held a hand out and Leo took it. He held Leo's hand in both of his, fingers lacing together. Leo's heart thudded hard in his chest and his skin prickled as he started soaking up some of Thatchery's rads. "Look, I'll be there with you when you tell them, if you want me to. I know it's hard. I wish I had someone who cared about me with me through the process of getting clean."

"Can you? Be there, I mean?" He sighed and looked down at his scuffed boots. "I don't know if I can do it alone."

"Yeah, of course. But you have to do it soon. I can't stay in town forever. I gotta run up to Minefield in a few days for Moira."

"Is tomorrow night okay?"

"Sure, yeah. Moira will purge the rads from my system by then." He let go of Leo's hand to chug some more Quantum. "I'll come by around 7:40."

Leo brought him another Quantum. They didn't talk for a while. Leo busied himself with the lunch rush and Thatchery tried to work his way through the second Quantum. The Geiger counter on his Pip-Boy ticked steadily in his corner of the restaurant.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, the lunch rush ended and Leo was free to sit with Thatchery. He brought him a third Quantum and a box of snack cakes, sighing as he occupied the chair opposite Thatchery.

"This is the last Quantum we have until our supply caravan comes through," he said. "And you should eat."

Thatchery chuckled and ripped into the box. "Let's see if I can keep these down." He stuffed a whole cake into his mouth and groaned at the taste of honey and sugar.

Leo eyed the Pip-Boy on Thatchery's left wrist. "What's your Geiger counter say?"

Thatchery tilted his arm. "Four oh-six," he said once he's swallowed. "I think I need to go stand in the puddle by the bomb..."

"Don't." Leo couldn't believe he even heard something that stupid come out of Thatchery's mouth. He thought the Vaultie was smart. "That's a really stupid idea, Thatch."

Thatchery snorted and ate another snack cake. "Maybe. But it's for science, so nothing's off the table."

"I won't stand in the water with you."

Thatchery glanced up at him. "You don't have to. I'll just sit at the edge of the water and stick my feet in."

Leo wasn't sure about this. "For how long?"

Thatchery shrugged. "I'm going to soak up what I can eating junk first. Probably not long. Why?"

Leo didn't answer the question. He bounced his leg under the table. "Is Moira going to give you RadAway?"

"Uh, well, she didn't explicitly say it was RadAway, but she said she had something to get rid of the rads."

Oh no. Not an experiment. Leo couldn't stop himself from putting a hand to his face and sighing. "So she doesn't know if it'll even fucking work?"

Thatchery shrugged at him. "She said she'd have RadAway right there in case the experiment doesn't work. Don't worry, Leo."

Leo frowned. Why wasn't Thatchery more concerned? He was irradiating himself at near-lethal levels for science. Didn't he know about the risk of becoming a ghoul, or worse? People died from radiation poisoning all the time, and if it didn't kill them, the mutations weren't pretty.

The possibility of Thatchery becoming a ghoul made Leo feel sick.

"I hope you know your limits as well as you think you do."  
~  
Thatchery reached six hundred rads within a few hours. He reached five hundred nineteen inside the Lantern by eating food, and then he said he was going to soak up the last eighty-one at the bomb. He leaned heavily against Leo on the way outside.

He sat on the edge of the little pool of water and stuck his feet, boots and all, into the murky water. His nose crinkled when the cold water soaked through the legs of his jumpsuit.

"Hey Leo?"

Leo sat beside Thatchery and hugged his knees to his chest. "Yeah?"

"What are you scared of?"

Leo stared at the water, at the spot where Thatchery's boots stirred up the mud. He mixed it up when he knocked his boots together at the toes. "Being alone."

"I'm scared of that too." He tipped his head back. "I'm scared of the sky, too. It's... It's different, not having a ceiling above you. I'm so used to looking up and seeing steel just a few feet above my head. And open spaces. How can there be so much space?"

"Was the vault cramped?"

"Yeah. There weren't a lot of us, but everyone knew everyone else's business."

It dawned on him how different this world must be for Thatchery. "Are you scared of this world?"

Thatchery was silent for a long while. His Geiger counter ticked frantically at him. "Yeah. It's the opposite of everything I knew growing up."

Leo's heart lurched when he looked at Thatchery. He knew suddenly what had been causing the fluttering in his stomach, the weird tightness in his chest. This asshole was making him feel things. The worst part was that Thatchery probably didn't even know what he was doing to Leo.

"Yeah," he said weakly, and they fell silent.

The sun finally gave way to stars that shine bright overhead, too many twinkling lights to count, but Leo wasn't looking at them. He was looking at the bomb, and occasionally at Thatchery out of the corner of his eye. Thatchery glowed green, just a little bit, his nose and lips and ears bright. Leo's arm prickle a little bit with radiation because of how close they were sitting.

Thatchery checked his Pip-Boy. "Help me up, would you?" he asked Leo.

Leo stood up, dusted himself off. He held a hand out to Thatchery and he pulled the Vaultie to his feet. Thatchery emitted heat and radiation where he was leaning against Leo's side, but Leo didn't mind. He didn't mind either that he was supporting most of Thatchery's weight, if only because Thatchery's legs couldn't support all of his weight.

Moira's face lit up when Thatchery stumbled inside. "Well hey! Feeling a bit under the weather? Or a bit over the Geiger counter?" she joked.

Thatchery chuckled weakly. "I'm about as irradiated as I can get without burning a hole through the floor," he said. Obviously he was not as sick as he looked, or he wouldn't still have been joking.

"I can tell... You're positively glowing!" Moira smiled, big and bright, at Leo. "Hey there Leo," she giggled. "What brings you up here?"

Thatchery weakly raised a hand. "I am guilty of that."

"He can't walk on his own," Leo explained.

Moira gasped and set about finding her notepad. "Right! You've contracted a lot of rads, huh?"

"Moira, please. Can we do the questions after?"

"I just need to know how you're feeling!"

"If I listen closely, I can hear my genes crying."

"So, you're experiencing delusions, too? Fascinating!" Moira scribbled that down on her notepad and set it aside. "I've never had a chance to test my home-made concoction on someone so heavily dosed! But I'm sure it'll work out fine. Exciting, isn't it? Okay, let me see here. Brahmin milk, a couple magnets, and maybe a few happy thoughts..."

Leo frowned. That sounded horrible. And Thatchery had to drink that?

Thatchery gagged before he had even tasted it. But he took a deep breath and chugged the glass. Leo grimaced. 

"Couldn't you have just given me RadAway?" Thatchery asked.

Moira snorted. "Silly! I needed to test this to see if it works! I was thinking that if it does, I could put the recipe in the Survival Guide, you know, for people who don't have the caps to buy RadAway."

Leo thought that maybe they were both surprised when Thatchery stopped looking so green. The sickly color started fading from his skin, and he wasn't glowing anymore. He couldn't believe her disgusting experiment actually worked.

"But hey, you're alive! That's the good news!"

Uh oh. Leo looked at Thatchery and felt that the horror in his stomach was exactly what was written across Thatchery's face. He knew that this was a stupid, stupid idea.

"But there was a little side effect. A teeny, tiny, um... mutation. But it seems to be benign, at least!" She picked up a small wooden crate. "Well, here, take these radiation chems, as my little way of saying, 'I'm sorry I twisted your DNA like a kitten with a ball of yarn.'"

Thatchery took the crate. "I think I'm going to take a break from the research."

"Well, okay," she frowned. "If you feel you really need one."

"I'll be back later to help you finish up the chapter," he said, and he headed for the door on wobbly legs.

Moira stopped Leo from following him, just for a moment. "Thank you for helping him," she said, all sunshine and cheer, like she hadn't almost killed Thatchery with her crazy radiation experiments. "I'm glad he's found another friend!"

Leo sighed and glanced at Thatchery, where he stood holding the door open for Leo. He was mostly leaning against the door to support himself as he sorted through the chems. "Yeah, me too."

Moira grinned like she knows a secret. "You should hear how he talks about you when he's helping me write my book! He really cares about you, you know."

Leo wasn't sure what to make of that. So he said goodnight to her and followed Thatchery outside. They didn't say much on the way to Thatchery's house, but Thatchery stopped him outside the door.

"Thanks for helping me," he said. "I know I'm frustrating and kind of a dumb asshole, but I'm glad you were with me."

"You couldn't walk on your own, Thatch."

Thatchery smiled. "Yeah, I know. But I had to do this."

Leo shoved his hands into his pockets. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight Leo."

He stood there until Thatchery had closed the door behind himself and the lights are off. He thoufht about what Moira had said on his way back to the Lantern, but he brushed it off after a few moments. It didn't mean anything, at least not anything Leo might want it to mean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I was going to put off Leo realizing his feelings until the next chapter, but jfc this was killing me. I absolutely **hate** writing slow burn.


	9. Dirty Paws

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And that really was the scary part, wasn't it? Not knowing what to say, how Jenny and Andy were going to react. If they were going to understand, if they would be supportive. What if they thought he was weak? An unfit brother?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so maybe this doesn't make sense, but I'm on two different prescription drugs and they make me more scatterbrained than normal. Tell me if something doesn't make sense, yeah?

Thatchery came by the Lantern around 7:45 the next evening. He looked like he had slept since Leo walked him up to his house last night. He stood by the counter and fiddled with his Pip-Boy. Leo watched his fingers turn the dials on the side of his Pip-Boy while he waited for the last two customers of the day to finish their dinners.

"You ever wear anything besides that vault suit?" Leo asked curiously.

Thatchery looked at him with wide eyes, like he was just startled by his voice. "Not really, no. I've worn these suits my whole life. It's the only thing I feel comfortable in."

"You have more than one?"

Thatchery laughed like the answer was obvious. It must have been, to him at least. "We all had a few suits down in the vault."

Leo glanced at the last two customers. They didn't look ready to leave yet, immersed in conversation even though their plates were empty. "What are you doing?"

Thatchery smiled sheepishly. "I was copying a poem."

"Poetry?"

Thatchery moved closer to him and held his arm at an angle that Leo could see his Pip-Boy screen clearly from. "Yeah. I found a book at Craterside full of short poems. I wanted to copy some down."

The door opened on squeaking hinges and Jenny came inside with a tub full of dirty dishes. She seemed to freeze when she saw them, standing as close as they were.

"I'm not..." She chuckled. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"

Thatchery shuffled away from Leo and grinned at her. "Not at all."

"Hey Jen?" Leo leaned against the counter. "You seen Andy?"

"Um, not for a couple of hours, no. I think he went into the back. Want me to look?"

Leo sighed and nodded. "Please. I need to talk to both of you."

Jenny set the tub down and wiped her hands on the front of her yellow jumpsuit. She was looking around nervously. "Uh, yeah, okay." She headed into the back of the building and Leo sighed.

"Hey, you're fine. I'm here too, okay?"

"Thank you," he said, leaning over the counter. The last two customers left, but Leo didn't pay them any attention. "I don't really... I don't know how to do this."

"No one does," Thatchery murmured, shaking his head. "That's the scary part."

And that really was the scary part, wasn't it? Not knowing what to say, how Jenny and Andy were going to react. If they were going to understand, if they would be supportive. What if they thought he was weak? An unfit brother?

Andy and Jenny came back into the dining area. They were smiling, but the smiles fell from their faces when they saw that Leo wasn't smiling. Leo took a deep breath.

"There's something I need to tell the both of you," Leo said. "It's not easy for me to say, and I'm sure it's not easy to hear. I... I'm a junkie. Well, I was. I went to the water plant at night, after work, to get high."

"Is that why you were coming up short?"

Jenny hit Andy's shoulder. "Andy, don't you dare!" she scolds.

Leo rubbed his neck. Of course that was all Andy cared about. Not if he had gotten all the help he needed, not if he was okay now. Not if he was done with the treatments. "Yeah, it is, Andy."

"How did you pay for it?" Jenny asked. "I hear the price is outrageous for a full treatment."

Leo felt something bump his shoulder and he saw that Thatchery was leaning over the counter behind him. Their shoulders bumped into each other.

"I payed for it!" Thatchery said cheerfully. He blowed a big pink bubble in his gum, and Leo wondered when it was he'd gotten bubblegum. "I figured I might as well, because I found out about it and I've heard how freaking expensive it is."

Andy's eyes narrowed at him. "What reason do you even have for helping him?"

Thatchery popped another bubble loudly. "Is that really important?"

Leo sighed and shook his head. He had to challenge Andy, didn't he? He was making this situation more difficult than it had to be.

But Andy did bring up a good point. Why did Thatchery help him? He had nothing to gain from doing it. And the reasons he'd given Leo for helping seemed logical when he said them, but no one helped anyone without gaining something in return. Not in this world.

"What do you want? Caps?"

Thatchery shook his head. "I have more caps than I know what to do with."

"Then what?"

"I don't want anything. It's just the right thing to do."

Ah, it was a morality thing. So he did it to make himself look good, then?

Andy's train of thought was on the same track as Leo's. "So my brother is just charity work for you to do?"

Thatchery groaned. "No! That's not it at all!"

Jenny had been biting at her thumb nail until now, when she reached up to smack her brother in the side of the head. Leo knew she would have done the same to Thatchery if he were their brother. She probably would have done it anyway if he were within reach. "Knock it off you two. What's it matter? Leo's gotten help, he's doing better. Whatever your beef with each other is shouldn't be brought up now."

Thatchery pulled a face at Andy and Jenny finally did hit him. "Okay, sorry," he says.

Jenny held her arms out to Leo and he wrapped her up in his arms. She had to lean up on her toes to match his height, and he had to bend down a little bit because he was still taller than her. "I don't care if it was a damn magic Brahmin that got you your medicine, Leo. I'm just glad to have my brother back."

Leo ducked his head to press his face against her shoulder. She smelled like that flowery soap she liked to use, and kind of like dirt. What was he scared of again?

Jenny released him, if only so that Andy could hug him. Her eyes were wet, and Leo pretended not to notice when she dabbed at them. Andy's hug was shorter than Jenny's, and he left without another word into the back of the restaurant.

"Oh, ignore him," Jenny said. "He's an insensitive ass."

Leo sighed, rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. "Yeah, I know."

"I'm glad you told us. It explains a lot, actually."

Leo kissed her cheek. "I'm going out for a smoke, okay?"

He left the Lantern and dug around in his pocket for his cigarettes. Thatchery bounced after him, his smile wide as he offered Leo a cigarette from the pack he fished out of his own pocket. Thatchery lent him his lighter too.

"That wasn't too bad," Thatchery said as he lit up his own cigarette. "Could have been worse."

"Yeah."

Thatchery pulled his hair up into a ponytail, his cigarette hanging from his lips. "I mean... Shit, man, at least you've got people who care, even if Andy doesn't show it the way he's supposed to."

Leo didn't say anything. They smoked in silence. Thatchery burned down his cigarette faster than Leo did his, and he snuffed out the butt underneath his boot.

"Goodnight Leo."

"Goodnight." He watched Thatchery head past the Lantern and up the hill. He wished he'd at least said 'thank you', because Thatchery didn't have to stick with him to tell Jenny and Andy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm obviously ignoring canon harder than I ever have before.


	10. Burning Heat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo laughed because Thatchery was infectious, spreading through his system like a plague, coating his insides with a fluttery feeling he'd never felt before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another early update! I'm shit at deadlines. I am either early or late, sorry.
> 
> Slow burn is coming to an end! Angst abounds soon. My children cannot be happy before they're hurt.

The days dragged on and Leo had never been more aware that running a restaurant was one of the most boring things he could think of. Sure, it was a good way to make enough caps to live on and he was safe inside the walls of Megaton with his siblings, but he was bored. He wondered sometimes what it would have been like if he'd stayed on as a caravan hand, if Andy and Jenny would still have started this restaurant thing without him.

That wasn't to say that he didn't enjoy working with his family. They were all he had and he loved them. He enjoyed talking to customers too, enjoyed that they knew who he was. He was grateful for a chance to live a life that he didn't have to constantly try to defend.

But then Leo thought about what would have happened if he had stayed a caravan hand, and he hadn't met Thatchery. He'd still be on Jet or he might even have moved on to one of the worse drugs. He wouldn't have gotten any help, he could have wound up dead somewhere, being chewed on by deathclaws for dinner.

"Whoa, what's got you starin' off, huh?"

Leo blinked hard at his sister. "Nothing, I just..." He fiddled with the dishrag in his hands. "I was thinking, is all."

Jenny picked up an empty crate and heaved it up onto the counter. She started filling it with various eating utensils. "This isn't about Thatchery, is it?"

He frowned. "Why would it be?"

"Well, he hasn't been around in a few days. It wouldn't be considered too weird to be worried."

Leo shook his head and started to help her gather up butter knives. "I wasn't thinking about that." He pulled a face. "Well, now I am."

Jenny chuckled and bumped his arm playfully. "I'm sure he's fine. He'll be back soon."

He was sure she was right, but wasn't it a little bit concerning that Three Dog hadn't reported anything new? If Thatchery was going to be gone, wouldn't he be doing something that Three Dog found worthy enough of his praise? He reported on damn near everything the kid did.

But maybe Thatchery didn't want Three Dog to tell anyone who would listen about what he was doing. Maybe he was doing something personal, something he'd asked Three Dog not to mention. The radio host didn't shut about how great of friends he and Thatchery seemed to be. Maybe Thatchery asked for some space.

"Dinner rush is starting soon," Jenny said, breaking Leo from his thoughts with an elbow in his side. She paused, eyes narrow. She held the crate at her hip, heaped full of silverware as clean as it could be in the Wasteland. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Tired, you know?"

She smiled. "Day's almost over."

Leo sighed and wiped down the counter. Yeah, the day was almost over.  
~  
He was having a cigarette outside when the town gates squealed open. It made such a racket that Confessor Cromwell even halted his late night preaching to look. Leo didn't pay it much mind; caravans came by all the time, with guards coming in for drinks or to find a bed for the night.

"Hello child!" Cromwell boomed.

"Hey Cromwell."

Leo perked up at the voice. He looked across to the bomb, where Cromwell was speaking with a head of curly blond hair. He watched Cromwell take some caps from him, and he blessed him loudly.

"Atom bless your soul, child! When He comes to Divide us all, you will be among His disciples!"

There was a laugh. "I don't donate for that. I just want to help the church."

"Bless you!"

"Take it easy, Cromwell."

Leo watched Thatchery turn around and start across the courtyard, up toward the houses by Moriarty's. He seemed to think better of it when he caught sight of Leo, and he made his way toward him.

"Hey."

"Hey. What was that about?"

Thatchery glanced at Cromwell, who was saying his evening prayers to Atom. "Donating to the church. I do it once a week."

Leo was surprised by that. The Children of Atom were nutcases whose only followers were people who have had their brains decayed by radiation. Thatchery didn't seem the type. "I didn't know you were religious."

"Not their religion," he said. He was looking at the bomb. "I grew up reading the Bible and praying with my father."

"Why do you donate if your beliefs are different?"

"It seems like the right thing to do. They're struggling to get enough food to feed their members, to buy enough books to copy their own version of the Bible." He shrugged. "I think my donations help, just a little bit."

"Ten caps doesn't help anyone."

Thatchery's nose crinkled. "A hundred does."

A hundred caps? How the hell did he have so much money? Most people didn't even have two caps to scrape together. And didn't he have to pay for his ammunition and supplies every time he left town?

Leo snuffed out his cigarette under his boot. "How do you have the money to donate that much?"

"I collect shit and sell it." Thatchery lit his own cigarette from the pack in his pocket. "Being the most popular guy in the Wasteland has its perks."

"I guess so."

They were silent for a little while as Thatchery smoked his cigarette. Leo didn't mind the silence; he thought about work and his thoughts went back to the caravan thing. If he'd stayed on as a guard, he wouldn't have this sort of thing late at night. He'd be too exhausted to talk to the other guard or the merchant and he'd just want to take a hit of Jet and sleep.

Sometimes he missed Jet. He missed the way the inhaler fit in his hand, the way it felt going down his airway into his lungs. He missed the high, the tingling along his nerves and the burning in his chest. He missed being fast, too quick for the burned-up world that turned so slowly on its axes, revolves everything on it at the pace of a slug. Everything but him.

Thatchery's elbow knocked into his arm when he flicked ash from his cigarette and Leo was brought back to the present, to the here and now. Thatchery leaned against the wall next to him. He was warm where their arms touched. He smelled like dirt, sweat, and cigarette smoke, the scent thick in Leo's nostrils.

"I gotta run up to Miss West's house before she goes to bed," Thatchery said, snuffing the remains of his cigarette out underfoot. He pushed himself off of the wall. "Do you want to go with me?"

He might have gotten carried away with his thoughts again if he didn't have a distraction. And who was Miss West? He'd never met her before. "Sure, yeah."

Thatchery led the way. He pulled his hair back into a ponytail on the way, and he chattered away about how fucking bright the sun was, how it hurt his eyes. Leo wasn't really listening to him, but he focused on the sound of his voice, grounded himself in the enthusiasm that oozed from Thatchery.

Thatchery stopped in front of the door to a tall house. He knocked a tune on the door, and rocked back on the balls of his feet while he waited for an answer.

The door opened a few moments later. There was a young woman standing there, her golden hair pulled back from her pretty face. She smiled when she saw Thatchery. "Oh, it's you! Come in!"

She ushered them both inside and shut the door. "I didn't expect you back so soon!" She smiled at Leo, the corners of her eyes crinkling up. He could tell the smile was false because it didn't reach her bright eyes. He gave enough of those himself. "Who's this?"

Leo held his hand out, mirroring her smile. "Leo Stahl."

She shook his hand firmly. "I'm Lucy West." And she promptly ignored him.

Thatchery was weirdly quiet, but he grinned when Lucy turned her attention to him. "I, uh, took care of that thing you wanted. Ian is going to come up here with the next caravan."

Lucy's face lit up and she threw her arms around Thatchery. "Oh, thank you! This is more than I ever expected!"

Leo wished he'd said no to Thatchery. He didn't like the way Thatchery smiled at Lucy, the way he let her touch his arm, his shoulder. She certainly was pretty, and she didn't look much older than Thatchery, maybe only a year or two. Younger than he was.

"Oh, I gave the letter to Ian too. He says he can't wait to see you."

"Thank you so much. I mean it. I wish I had something to give you."

Thatchery shook his head. "I don't need anything, Miss West. I just wanted to help out."

Leo felt a little bit better about the way Thatchery called her 'Miss West' instead of 'Lucy'. Like maybe he wasn't flirting back. He felt silly to think this way. Thatchery wasn't his, didn't look at him the same way Jenny teased that Leo looked at him. They were just friends. It shouldn't matter if Thatchery wanted her, with her golden hair and musical laughter, her wide hips and red lips.

"Goodnight, Miss West," Thatchery said as they started to leave.

"Goodnight Thatchery. Goodnight Leo."

Leo echoed the sentiment, called her Miss West because it seemed appropriate, because Thatchery called her that. He followed Thatchery outside, past houses with lights on and the last stragglers heading to their own beds. Thatchery lit up another cigarette somewhere by Moriarty's.

"You were uncomfortable," he said.

Leo shrugged, shoved his hands into his pockets. "Yeah. I didn't know her."

"Didn't like her," he said. Leo realized that he was correcting him. "That's fine. She comes off too nice, too flirty."

"She wasn't flirting with me," he pointed out. He knew his tone had betrayed him.

Thatchery made a noise of acknowledgement, but he didn't say anything about it, about the quiver in his voice. "She thinks I'm interested."

That made him feel better, like it was something he wanted to hear. But he should have pretended like it was just Thatchery thinking aloud instead of anything he might have wanted it to be. That was all it was.

Leo looked at him, the way the moon shone off of his hair and sparked up his dark eyes. He'd put on weight since they met, filling out his jumpsuit better. He was still shorter than most of the people Leo had met, hardly came up to Leo's chin, but he didn't seem bothered by it.

"Can I ask you something?" Thatchery asked suddenly.

Leo was aware that he had been staring, so he looked instead at the metal walls around them, his face flushed with embarrassment. "Sure."

Thatchery didn't say anything. He flicked away ash, burned down half of his cigarette. "If you had a chance to see your home again, would you?"

Leo didn't like hypothetical questions, especially ones he didn't have answers to. He was already home, here in Megaton. He lived here. He had made it home.

"The vault?" he asked.

Thatchery nodded mutely, blew smoke up toward the moon.

"You can go back?"

"The broadcast didn't say that I could stay." He flicked away ash. "I don't want to either. But I have to go back. They asked for my help, I have to."

"But you don't want to."

Leo didn't understand where Thatchery was going with this. Was he asking Leo if he should go back?

"No, especially not alone. Those assholes tried to kill me last time." He stepped on his cigarette butt to extinguish it. "Do you want to go with me? It won't be so bad."

"You just said they tried to kill you."

"Yeah, but they only have 10 mils down there and we have good weapons."

Leo still didn't understand. "We?"

Thatchery smiled in the moonlight, showing straight white teeth, but it was not genuine. "You don't want to come with?"

He was hoping Leo said yes. His hands were shoved in his pockets, balled into fists, and his smile was false, hiding his nervousness. Nervous about what? Going back?

Leo glanced down into the crater, at the front door of the Lantern. He could use a break. "Yeah, I'll go with you."

Thatchery's face brightened, and his smile turned genuine. "Thank you."

"What are friends for?"

Thatchery looked away, up at the full, cratered moon, blanketing its bright white light across the town, asleep already. "Yeah."

They didn't say anything else, and Leo lit a cigarette from his own pack. They started to walk again, in the direction of the crater, of their houses, Thatchery jabbering about energy weapons and something called a railway rifle. He mimicked the noise the latter makes, crowing, "Choo choo!" like he wouldn't wake the whole town. Leo laughed because Thatchery was infectious, spreading through his system like a plague, coating his insides with a fluttery feeling he'd never felt before.

Thatchery looked like he might have wanted to say something when they stopped at the Lantern. He said, "I'll see you in the morning, then?" That wasn't what he wanted to say.

"Yeah, okay. Breakfast?"

"Yeah."

Thatchery went up to his house, hands in the pockets of his jumpsuit. Leo finished his cigarette and sparked up another, hoped the burning in his chest would fade with the burning of his cigarette. Jenny would ask where he was so late. It must have been close to eleven already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Even though the slow burn is ending, they get to do the schmoopy couple stuff. And angst later on.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up.


	11. Tear In My Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thatchery didn't say anything for a while. His silence unnerved Leo, made him worry about his friend. They shouldn't have come to the vault.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates might be bumped up to Wednesdays, since that seems to be when the final draft has been finished. I don't know yet. Maybe we'll just have irregular updates.

Thatchery came by the Lantern shortly after eight twenty in the morning. He had two rifles with him, one plasma and one laser. The plasma was hanging over his shoulder by the strap, the laser cradled in his arms. He handed the laser rifle to Leo, thrust it into his arms as soon as he saw him.

"We shouldn't need these," he said. "But it's better to be safe than sorry."

Leo checked the safety and pulled the strap over his shoulder. It may have been a while since he last shot a rifle, but he was sure that he could handle a laser. He had heard Thatchery say the recoil wasn't as bad as that of an assault rifle. He'd never even touched a laser. They were always too expensive and he was never able to afford one.

"We'll be back," Leo said to Jenny on their way out.

"Have fun. Don't keep him too late, Thatchery."

Thatchery laughed and said, "I can't promise anything but to bring him back in one piece."

They made it to the vault entrance with no trouble. It was the first time in months that Leo had been outside of Megaton. He always forgot how dusty and desolate it was. He never wanted to remember. Thatchery led the way to the vault entrance and they entered the rocky tunnel carefully. The kid hesitated before punching in the code and pulling the lever on the console. Alarms blared, echoed off of the cave walls. The large steel door screeched as it was pulled inward. Leo flinched at the noise, but Thatchery didn't seem bothered by it.

Thatchery didn't say anything as he headed inside. Leo followed silently. It didn't feel right; Leo felt like they were trespassing, like maybe they weren't supposed to be there. But Thatchery had known the password to get inside. He was invited in but Leo wasn't. Maybe _he_ was trespassing.

There was a man standing behind a barricade just past the vault door. He was wearing thick padded armor and holding a 10 mil pistol in his hand. He panicked when he saw them in the doorway and he raised up the pistol.

"Stop right there! I don't know how you got in here, but... Hold on..." He lowered the pistol. He recognized Thatchery, at least enough to lower his weapon. "My god, it's you! I hardly recognized you with all that dust and grime from out there!"

Thatchery shoved his hands into his pockets. "Is this how bad things are down here? You're willing to shoot anyone who comes through the door?"

"The vault went to hell when you and your father left. I assume that's why you're here?" Officer Gomez looked behind Thatchery at Leo. "Who's this?"

"My friend Leo Stahl. He's from a town nearby."

Gomez looked surprised. "There are towns?"

"Whole communities, bigger than the vault." He frowned at the man. "Where's Amata?"

"Amata and the rest of the rebels are in the clinic. Just be careful down here. The vault's changed, I tell you."

Thatchery seemed to know the way to the clinic. He was uncharacteristically quiet, glancing around the vault. Leo glanced around too.

Leo had never been inside a vault. He had heard stories of a couple of them, about how they were all decaying, their inhabitants dead or long ago integrated into the surface world. But weren't they all just guises for horrible experiments?

But Thatchery seemed normal. He was definitely not a clone, like Leo had heard of from vault one-oh-six. And as far as Leo could tell, there wasn't anything that screamed, _"Get out!"_ about the place. It was dark, and the climate systems may have been giving out, but he hadn't seen anything morbidly wrong.

They stopped in the atrium. There was a kid maybe Thatchery's age standing there in a leather jacket. He looked a little frightened, but he was standing his ground against an elderly man in the same armor as Gomez. He was toting the same weapon too.

They were arguing. The kid said they were going to open the vault, that the overseer's goons couldn't stop them. The old man said he didn't want to shoot him, called him Freddie and told him to go back down below. This Freddie kid laughed and asked if he was going to cage him like Brotch. He said the old man couldn't cage a Tunnel Snake. The old man was so frightened.

"Put the pistol down," Thatchery said calmly. The old man and Freddie looked at him.

"You! You're the one who's caused all this trouble!" the old man shouted. "Don't you know enough to stay away?"

Thatchery didn't move. The pistol was trained on the both of them. "Please, just put the pistol down. No one has to get hurt."

The old man was shaking as he set the pistol down. Freddie ran the opposite direction, not even bothering to acknowledge them. Leo figured he had gone toward the clinic.

"Come on," Thatchery said quietly, and he led them in the direction the other kid ran.

Thatchery didn't say anything for a while. His silence unnerved Leo, made him worry about his friend. They shouldn't have come to the vault.

Leo had to wonder how many kids wearing leather jackets were there in the vault.

There was another one standing in the hallway. He drew a switchblade when he saw them, but he put it away when he recognized Thatchery.

"Damn, look who came waltzing back into the vault." He frowned. "You're not wearin' the jacket."

Thatchery sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, beneath his curls. "Yeah. I don't want to damage it, y'know?"

"Why'd ya come back, huh?"

"I heard Amata's plea for help. I just want to fix what my dad fucked up." His hands were shaking. "Butch, where is she?"

"In the clinic." Butch was looking at Leo. "Nosebleed, take me with you when you leave."

Thatchery shook his head. "No way. Why would you think I came here to help you?"

"You're a goody two-shoes, ain't ya? You get off on helping people. Isn't that why you saved my mom?"

"I saved her because I wasn't going to let her die."

Butch scowled. "Fine. Be that way. But can't you at least open the vault?"

Thatchery's fingers were cold where they brushed Leo's at his side. "We'll see."

The clinic was full of people. It was dark and there were kids sleeping on cots, some sitting in corners and speaking quietly. There was a young woman standing in the middle of the room. She was fiddling with her Pip-Boy, but she seemed to notice when Thatchery had gone into the room.

"Oh my god, you're back! You got my message and you came back!" She threw her arms around Thatchery. Leo felt a pang of jealousy when Thatchery squeezed her.

"Of course I came back," Thatchery whispered. He cleared his throat and gestured to Leo. "This is my friend, Leo Stahl. He's from a town nearby."

She smiled and shook his hand. "I'm Amata Almodovar."

"It's nice to meet you."

Amata was a nice girl, but she looked older than she probably was. She looked like a mess, her hair falling from the tie in it and dark circles beneath her eyes. She was thin, her vault suit hanging from her body.

"Everything's gone crazy since you left." She led them into the office, where their conversation wouldn't be overheard. She didn't shut Leo out of the room, but he stood out of the way in the corner. This didn't concern him. "I think you can set things right."

Thatchery settled in the chair that used to be for patients. Amata was in the cushy office chair. "You saved my life. Of course I'll help."

Amata explained all of the things her father had done, everything that the rebels had been trying to do for the sake of the vault. Leo listened to Thatchery's responses, bit back a smile when Thatchery said they would go talk to Amata's father. Thatchery wanted to set things right. Of course he did.

Leo wondered about the blood everywhere, dried and flaking. What happened? There was too much of it, spattered everywhere like red snow. Thatchery noticed it too, but he didn't ask Amata about it. Leo didn't either.

Thatchery was headed toward the rest of the clinic. "Come on," he said to Leo.

"Just..." Amata sighed and leaned in the doorway. "Please don't do anything rash or hurt him, okay?"

Thatchery paused. "Yeah, I'll try. I promise."

It was outside of the clinic that Thatchery kissed him, briefly as he leaned up on his toes, and it was over as soon as it began. Leo didn't know if he should have told Thatchery no or if he should have pulled him back, but Thatchery moved away from him. He didn't have time to think about it now.

They found Amata's father up in his office. He was a narrow-sighted man with all the personality of a doorknob. He was mocking Thatchery, sneering that he couldn't just come back to the vault. He'd been exiled once he'd left, he said it as if it wasn't obvious.

Thatchery didn't dignify that with a response. He said instead that they didn't have enough people to sustain themselves, that opening the vault would be the best decision they could possibly make. The overseer turned to look outside his window, down at the atrium below. He agreed after a moment of thought, and he ran ahead to tell Amata he was appointing her overseer.

"Thatchery." Leo stopped him in the corridor with a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Are you all right?"

Thatchery shook his head. His eyes were wet. "No, but now's not the time or the place. Maybe when we leave, yeah?"

Leo wasn't sure that Thatchery was going to leave with him, but he nodded and released Thatchery's shoulder. Thatchery wiped his face on his sleeve before he went inside the clinic.

Amata was grateful. "Thank you. I can't believe you and him managed to keep your words civil."

"I always knew I was the better man," he joked.

Leo wasn't listening, not really. He was watching the guy in the jacket, Freddie. He was talking to a girl with blonde hair, who snapped at him when she caught him staring at Thatchery. He was ashamed, but not because she was angry. It was something else.

Thatchery's voice distracted him. His smile was false, tears shining in his eyes in the dim light of the clinic. "You ready?"

"Uh, yeah."

Amata looked sad too. Thatchery didn't hug her, but his hands tremblde like he wanted to. She tried to hug him, but he didn't reciprocate it. He marched straight out of the clinic, a little plastic bobblehead clutched tight in his hand. Leo had no choice but to follow him.

Thatchery broke down inside the tunnel, when the door was squealing shut behind them. Tears raced each other down his cheeks and his breath shook. He tried to push forward toward Megaton, but Leo stopped him. He closed his eyes and refused to look at Leo, even when his tears were wiped away by Leo's calloused thumbs.

"Do you want to tell me what's wrong?"

Thatchery didn't hesitate, blurting, "That was my home, all I knew my whole life. I hardly know anything else. The thought that they can just throw me out the way they did hurts." He wiped his face on his sleeve and sighed heavily.

"What about Megaton? You know everyone there thinks of you as one of their own."

Thatchery lifted a shoulder in a halfhearted shrug. "I feel like you're lying to try and make me feel better."

"I want you to think of it as home."

Thatchery was silent for a long while, and he finally looked at Leo. "About earlier, when I kissed you--"

"It's not a big deal."

Thatchery turned away and headed down the tunnel. Leo followed, but he didn't stick too close. Maybe it was a big deal to Thatchery. Maybe now he thought that it wasn't anything at all to Leo.

But it was. He thought about how soft Thatchery's lips were, the waxy residue left behind on Leo's lips when he pulled away. Leo touched his lips. Briefly, he could taste the wax, the flavor something fruity and sweet. What was that?

They parted at the gate after Leo had handed the laser rifle back. Thatchery mumbled out a thank you, his fingers cold where they brushed Leo's arm, and he headed toward Craterside Supply. Leo wanted to follow him, but he decided to give the Vaultie some space.

Leo lit a cigarette. He'd been smoking more since he realized how he felt about Thatchery, would probably smoke even more since Thatchery kissed him.

He wished that he would have said something different, something that wasn't 'It's not a big deal'. Because it was a big deal. What he felt wasn't as one-sided as he'd thought. Either that or Thatchery just wanted someone to comfort him, keep him warm in this cold world. What better person than someone you already knew, someone you called a friend?

That West girl would have been fine, a better candidate for Thatchery's affections than Leo was. She seemed nice enough, not at all like she had done anything questionable. She probably didn't even smoke cigarettes.

Leo snuffed the cigarette out halfway through and stuck it back in his pack. He felt selfish for wanting to think that Thatchery meant every implication behind the kiss. Maybe Thatchery was thinking about someone else. There was something about the way that guy in the leather jacket was looking at him before he ran off, the wide eyes and guilty flush on his face, and the way he avoided Thatchery in the clinic but still watched his every move.

Jenny smiled at him when he approached the door to the Lantern. "Hey Leo. How was it?"

"It was okay. I'll tell you about it later." He thought that maybe he would leave out the part about the kiss.

She picked her magazine up again and Leo went inside. Andy grumbled about how he had had to cover his shift, and he headed into the back. Leo sighed as he leaned against the wall. This was going to be a long evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up.


	12. I'm Inside Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey, rose, just born  
> Twin to a thorn;  
> Was't so with you, O Love and Scorn?
> 
> Sweet eyes that smiled,  
> Now wet and wild:  
> O Eye and Tear- mother and child.
> 
> Well: Love and Pain  
> Be kinfolks twain;  
> Yet would, Oh would I could Love again.
> 
> \- Sidney Lanier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Todd Howard doesn't give anyone much of a past in this damn game, so I'm pretty much making one for the Stahl siblings.
> 
> I hit 300 followers on tumblr, so here's a double update to celebrate!
> 
> The summary is A Song of Love.

Leo hadn't seen Thatchery for _days_. That was fine. He understood that Thatchery might have needed space after what happened. He knew that maybe his word choice hadn't been the best at the time. He wouldn't blame Thatchery if he wanted to put some space between them, to stop any further attachments before they happened.

Jenny noticed how distracted Leo was one slow afternoon. She sat at the bar across from him and gently touched his arm. "Do you want to talk?" she asked once he'd turned his attention to her.

He shrugged, picked at a spot on the counter where there was a hole in the scrapped metal. "Worried about Thatchery," he mumbled.

"It's more than that."

Leo didn't want to say it, but he never was able to keep anything from her. "He kissed me. I told him it wasn't a big deal."

"Leo," she said, soft and a little disapproving. "Why would you say that?"

"I didn't want him to think that it was something I'd wanted for a long time. I thought it would pressure him." He sighed. "What if it wasn't even me he wanted to kiss? What if I was just there and he kissed me because he couldn't kiss the other person?"

Jenny shook her head. "That's not true and you know it. Leo, he likes you, enough that he'll kiss you at least. Maybe you just don't see the way he smiles at you."

"It doesn't matter," he muttered. "He probably doesn't want to see me again."

"Don't say that. He cares about you, Leo. Why did you think he was devoting so much time to you?"

Leo wasn't sure what to say. She was right, he knew that in the back of his mind, heard a small voice say it.

"What if I was just supposed to be a distraction?"

Jenny frowned at him. "Is my brother still in there?" She took his hand in hers, gently squeezing his fingers. "Leo, you never used to dwell on 'what if's or doubt yourself like this. What's gotten into you?"

Leo had been wondering that himself recently. "I... I don't know."

She smiled softly, a sad little thing. "Aw, my big brother is lovesick."

"I'm not."

_Am I?_

"Yes you are. You're thinking too hard about him." Jenny squeezed his hand again, her hands small and soft against his dry skin. "Sweetheart, don't worry. He'll come back."

"I'm worried that he won't want to talk to me again."

She shook her head, her soft copper curls swinging with the motion. "Don't think like that. Of course he will."  
~  
Leo didn't sleep easy that night. He was awake for hours while Jenny and Andy slept soundly. His mind kept going back to Jenny's words, teasing him that he was lovesick. That wasn't right, was it? It was just a side effect of Thatchery being the only person outside of his siblings that he spent time with. It would fade.

Leo shoved his feet in his boots and snuck outside for a cigarette. Megaton was quiet, just the sounds of metal creaking and crickets chirping. Only a few people were outside; Sheriff Simms, Nathan, and one of the caravan guards who had wandered into town were among them.

Leo's lighter was giving out. He thought about going to Moira in the morning to see if she would have one. She probably did, or the caravan that was in town would.

Leo remembered his mother then, how she would scold his father about his smoking habit. He remembered her voice, remembered the worn book of poems she would read to him and his siblings. He remembered his favorite poem, A Song of Love, but the author's name he never bothered with. It was her favorite poem too.

_Hey, rose, just born_  
_Twin to a thorn;_  
_Was't so with you, O Love and Scorn?_

_Sweet eyes that smiled,_  
_Now wet and wild:_  
_O Eye and Tear- mother and child._

_Well: Love and Pain_  
_Be kinfolks twain;_  
_Yet would, Oh would I could Love again._

She would read that one the most, because Andy never liked poetry and Jenny was always the first one to fall asleep. He missed her even after all these years. He wondered if Jenny and Andy did too. If they missed Dad more than he did.

Leo snuffed out his cigarette and lit another one. He wasn't going to sleep tonight, he knew that. He would be exhausted tomorrow morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up. I recently posted a few photos of Thatchery made in the Fallout 4 CC, if anyone is wondering what he looks like.


	13. My Desire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well. Leo wasn't expecting that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is porn. The rating gets bumped up. I know some of you may not want to read that, so you can skip that part, but there is some important bits. Mainly the first half.

Leo had been hearing rumors all day that Thatchery was back in town. They said they'd seen him repairing those leaky pipes around town, and then he had disappeared inside the Water Treatment Plant. If the rumors were true, Thatchery was avoiding him. He understood why, but he wished that they could at least talk. Leo had to apologize.

It was nearly evening when Thatchery came by the Brass Lantern. He watched Leo deal with Nathan, and Leo was well aware of his eyes watching him. He tried to stall as long as he could, even wiping up the counter that he'd just cleaned.

Leo was nervous when Thatchery came up to the counter. What was he supposed to say? "Good to see you again! What's new? Feel like having a drink? C'mon, let's talk!"

"We'll talk later tonight." Leo felt the forced smile fade from his face. Thatchery didn't seem to have an interest in hiding behind false smiles anymore. He looked tired. "Can I get a beer?"

Leo wiped his palms on his pant legs and moved toward the fridge in the back, where there were cold beers. "Here you go," he said as he set it down on the counter. He leaned over the counter, just enough to seem casual, his palms flat on the cold metal surface. "Where've you been?"

"Were you worried?" Thatchery was nervous too. He was picking at the faded label of the beer, tearing the wrinkled paper into scraps. He was avoiding Leo's eyes.

"Of course." He thought about holding Thatchery's hand, and after a moment or two, he reached for his fingers, gently pried his hand from the bottle he was clutching so tightly in his hands. "I care about you, Thatchery."

Thatchery sighed and pushed the little paper scraps into a pile with his other hand. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." Leo glanced around the restaurant. It was empty. The clock said six forty. "Do you want to go for a walk? We can talk now."

Thatchery shrugged. He hadn't pulled his hand away from Leo's yet. "Sure. I... Yeah, okay..."

They left the Lantern and Thatchery didn't drop his hand. Leo didn't know what to say yet. They went up toward the Water Treatment Plant, Thatchery following his lead. That was where it had all started, wasn't it? Seemed like a good place to end it, if that was what Thatchery wanted.

Walter was inside, checking pipes and tightening bolts. He stood up when he noticed them, wiped his hands on a rag from his pocket. "Well, hey there!" He was cheerful today. "I didn't expect to see you back so soon, Thatchery!"

"I don't have any scrap metal right now," he mumbled. His grip tightened on Leo's hand. "I came here with Leo."

Walter seemed to finally notice how close they were standing, that they were holding hands. He nodded and pat himself for his cigarettes. "Well, I was just about to go smoke a cigarette."

The plant was quiet when the door had closed. Water sloshed between the rusted parts of churning metal and the metal pipes creaked around them. Thatchery sighed and he started for the back, where the office was. Leo followed, their fingers still locked together. He was so nervous.

"Look, I'm sorry about what I said."

Thatchery didn't say anything. He wrapped his arms around Leo and laid his head on Leo's chest. He sighed and Leo heard him sniffle, felt tears soaking through his shirt.

"I'm such a fuck up," he mumbled.

"No you're not," Leo said. He rubbed Thatchery's back gently, trying to soothe his hiccuping sobs.

"I tried to put some space between us because you're not interested, and I get it — "

"Why would you think that?"

Thatchery shrugged but Leo knew he had a reason. "You..." He sighed and moved to perch on the desk. "Never mind..."

"Thatchery," he said softly. "If it's what I said, I'm sorry. Truth is, I'd been wanting to kiss you for weeks before you kissed me."

Thatchery scrubbed at his face. "Why?"

Leo leaned against the doorframe. "Why did you want to kiss me?"

Thatchery frowned. "I asked you first."

"Because I..." He sighed. He didn't want to tell Thatchery why. "I might be falling for you, I don't know..."

Thatchery looked horrified. He hopped off of the desk and stood in front of Leo. His eyes were as wide as saucers and he was grabbing at his own hair. "Don't say that."

"I'm not going to lie to you, Thatchery." He brought a hand up to Thatchery's cheek, stroked his thumb over the dark circles beneath Thatchery's eye. Thatchery's hands fell away. "I might be. And it scares me, too."

Thatchery leaned into Leo's palm and he huffed. "I don't want you to fall for me." Leo's chest hurt. "I'm a mess. You deserve better."

Leo shook his head. "I'm just as much of a mess as you are." He leaned down, enough that Thatchery could close the gap between them if he wanted to. "If you really don't want to do this with me, I'll understand."

"I want to try." He slid a hand down Leo's chest. He licked his lips and looked up at Leo. His eyes were the color of whiskey. "I might not be around too often."

"That's all right. Just don't disappear on me."

Thatchery sighed and tucked his head beneath Leo's chin. He was warm. He smelled like dirt and plasma.

Thatchery leaned up on his toes to kiss him, softly and a little bit unsure. "Do you want to go to my place?"

Well. Leo wasn't expecting that.

"Yeah, okay."

They held hands on the way to Thatchery's house. Thatchery was squeezing his hand a little tight, but that was okay. Leo had gotten to hold his hand, got to kiss him again.

"Make yourself comfortable," he said. Leo sat on the sofa while Thatchery moved into the small kitchen area. "Do you want a drink?"

He was almost certain that Thatchery hadn't invited him over for a drink. It was more for Thatchery's sake, he thought. "Sure."

Thatchery dug around in the fridge for a moment. He returned to the sofa with two beers. His hands were shaking as he opened his beer.

Leo opened his own beer and put the cap beside Thatchery's on the coffee table. They drank in silence, just the sound of something bubbling upstairs and the Handy hovering somewhere.

Thatchery cleared his throat after a little while. He'd chugged a good portion of his beer. "I don't know if you want to go upstairs...?"

"In a minute." Leo found Thatchery's hand on the couch between them and he wound their fingers together. "You seem nervous."

"A little bit. I mean, we're going to go upstairs in a few minutes and do something that I'm not very experienced at."

"We don't have to."

"I want to. I've been wanting to." He sighed and leaned forward for a kiss, soft and uncertain. "If it's all right with you, I want to go upstairs."

"Is the beer for liquid courage?"

Thatchery crinkled his nose. "Maybe. Nothing like a little alcohol to help someone get over their nerves, right?"

"You don't have anything to be nervous about. I haven't done anything in a while either." He kissed Thatchery again. "It's just me."

Thatchery sighed and laid his head on Leo's shoulder. "Do you want to go now? Y'know, before I lose my nerve and you change your mind?"

"I don't think I'd change my mind."

Leo let himself be pulled upstairs by Thatchery, who was shaking with nerves and anticipation. Thatchery kissed him desperately against the closed door of his bedroom, hands rucking up Leo's shirt. Leo brought the zipper of his jumpsuit down and Thatchery made a soft noise at the back of his throat. He echoed that noise, drowned it in Thatchery's mouth.

Thatchery pulled away from him. He was afraid for a moment that Thatchery had changed his mind, but when he opened his eyes, he saw that Thatchery was pulling his Pip-Boy off of his wrist. He dropped it on the desk and tugged his arms from his sleeves, let the vault suit drop to hang around his waist. He kissed Leo again, lips soft against his chapped ones and hands firm against his neck.

Leo removed his shirt when Thatchery moved away again, and he watched Thatchery strip off the shirt he wore beneath the tight jumpsuit. He was warm when he pressed against Leo again, all grace and lean muscle beneath his soft skin. He admired the dark freckles that dusted Thatchery's shoulders and his chest, spattered across his cheeks. He was never able to see them until they were this close, never able to see the way some of them connected into constellations.

God, he was beautiful, wasn't he?

Thatchery snorted and traced a scar on Leo's shoulder. "Admiring me?"

"A little bit," he answered, swiping a thumb over a cheekbone. "What's not to admire?"

Thatchery smiled, his eyes so bright in the dark room. He kissed Leo again, leaning up to do it. Leo held his hips and felt Thatchery's hands at his fly. Fingers pulled the zipper down and popped the button through the hole.

"My bed's a little narrow, but I think we can fit if we squeeze," he mumbled.

"We'll make it work."

Thatchery kicked his boots off and his socks. He shed his jumpsuit, dumped it on the pile with the rest of their clothes and sat on the bed. Leo left his pants in the pile, his boots next to Thatchery's and his socks somewhere there.

Thatchery shifted so that he sat in Leo's lap. The Quantum cap pendant he wore was bright in the dark room, settled against Thatchery's sternum. It glowed just as the drink it came from. Leo kissed him again, his thumb rubbing at a scar on Thatchery's hip. Thatchery was eager now that he'd gotten over his nerves. He pushed his hips down against Leo's and groaned.

"Okay, uh..." He muttered something and climbed off of Leo. He rummaged in the desk for something, and Leo heard him swear. "I thought I left it here..." He pushed a hand through his hair. "I'll be right back. Uh, you should..."

"Yeah."

Leo got rid of his boxers, the last piece of clothing he was wearing. Thatchery took his off too once he'd come back, after he had closed the door behind himself. He handed Leo a little bottle, its contents cold in his palm.

"You know, so we don't..." He sighed and sat in Leo's lap again. "Friction."

"Yeah."

Thatchery took Leo's hand and dribbled some of the liquid into his palm. Leo rubbed his hands together until the lubricant had warmed and he wrapped his hand around Thatchery's cock. Thatchery groaned above him, his face pressing into Leo's hair.

"Leo," he mumbled, whimpered when Leo squeezed gently. "Fuck..."

Leo shifted his hand to grip them both loosely. Thatchery took the hint and rolled his hips, rubbing their cocks together. Thatchery's hands were clutching at his biceps, short nails digging into his skin, as they rutted against each other.

Thatchery's breaths were short, puffing hot along the side of Leo's face as he pushed their cocks together. Leo was breathing hard too and he struggled to keep his hand steady. Thatchery was close; Leo could tell by the way his breath caught in his throat and the way his movements faltered.

"Leo," he breathed. "I'm..."

"I know."

Leo pressed his lips against Thatchery's shoulder, his chest, anywhere he could. Thatchery was shaking above him and Leo felt it too. He could feel the heat pooling in his stomach, swore he could feel Thatchery's heart beating.

"Leo," he gasped. He came over Leo's hand, swearing sharply and using a few words that Leo had never even heard before.

Thatchery's short nails scraped down his chest as he sagged against him. Leo let him push his hand away, and he groaned when Thatchery started to stroke him loosely. He was still trembling, but he took a deep breath and tightened his grip on Leo's cock, mouthing wetly at Leo's neck. Leo gasped his name as he came, pressed his face into the crook of Thatchery's neck.

"Okay?" Thatchery mumbled.

"Yeah."

Thatchery leaned over toward the floor at the head of the bed for something. He came up with a rag which he used to clean up. "You can spend the night here, if you want."

Leo kissed the corner of his mouth softly. "If we can both find a way to fit."

Thatchery chuckled and moved away from the bed. He found a blanket and they tried to find a comfortable position on the narrow mattress. That ended up with Leo on his side against the wall and Thatchery curled against him, which he didn't mind.

Thatchery fell asleep easily, but Leo was awake for a little while longer. Thatchery always smelled like cigarettes and dust, the scent clinging to his hair and his mouth. He drifted off counting Thatchery's freckles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope it's good. I don't usually post this sort of thing, so... Yeah...
> 
> Comments and kudos are appreciated.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up.


	14. Ambling Madly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He saw Jenny turn to look at him out of the corner of his eye, saw her own eyes wide.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another new update! Because I am in a mood today. I'm not saying expect another update this week, but it probably is safe to.
> 
> I'm still building a past for the Stahl siblings. And the last quarter of this got deleted, already edited and ready for posting, before I could put it up and I had to rewrite it. Can't say I'm very happy with the way it was rewritten.

Leo woke up late. He knew it was late because when he sat up and started to look for his pants, Thatchery asked him if he was supposed to be at work. He hadn't even looked up from the papers spread in front of him at the desk until Leo was standing beside him.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" Leo asked, leaning against the desk.

Thatchery bit the end of the pen he was holding in his hand. Dogmeat perked up from where he lay beneath the desk, apparently thinking that Thatchery was eating something. "I didn't think I should have. We didn't get to sleep until late, and I thought I'd let you sleep."

Leo frowned at Thatchery's Pip-Boy. "What time is it?"

Thatchery looked at his wrist. "Uh, ten fifty-three."

"Shit." Leo kissed Thatchery's temple. "I gotta go. I'll see you later?"

"I'll be in for lunch," he said. He waved a hand as Leo left the bedroom.

Wadsworth greeted him downstairs. He swore he hated that thing, with its three sensors that followed his every move and its overly-cheery voice. It was fucking creepy.

"Ah, Master Leo! Leaving so soon?"

Leo opened his mouth to respond, but Thatchery called down from the bedroom, "Wadsworth, what have I said about bothering guests?"

"Of course, sir! Have a wonderful day!" It muttered to itself as it hovered up the stairs.

Leo laced his boots up downstairs, frowning at the beer they had left from last night. It was probably going to be thrown out by the Handy. Unless Dogmeat knocked it over first.

The air was muggy outside, but the sky was clear. It would be a nice day to go outside the walls, if raiders weren't going to be out there. He wondered if Thatchery had cleared out that school yet.

Jenny's grin was as wide as the Potomac when he went inside the Lantern. "Well, look who it is."

"Sorry I'm late," Leo said as he started on the dishes that Jenny had left from the breakfast rush.

"Your ass better be sorry," Andy called from somewhere in the back.

Jenny rolled her eyes. She leaned closer, a sparkle in her eyes. "So, you spent the night at his house, huh?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Well, I noticed that you hadn't come home last night. You didn't even come back to help with the dinner rush."

"Sorry about that." He dried his hands on a towel she handed him. "I wasn't going to stay that late, but we lost track of time."

"I'm sure you did." There was something in her tone that suggested she knew that he was a liar. "At least now you're here to help for lunch."

"Yeah."

The next hour and a half ticked by slowly. He and Jenny played card games in between customers, and Andy grumbled when he found out no one was outside at the bar. He took that job over, which freed Jenny up for another game of blackjack.

Thatchery came in at twelve forty-eight. He wasn't wearing his vault suit, just a pair of loose-fitting pants and a T-shirt that was too big on his small frame.

"Hey Jenny," he smiled.

"You look tired," she said. "Long night?"

Thatchery laughed. "Funny." He leaned up on his toes to kiss Leo. "Hey."

"Hey. Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I fell asleep at the desk and my back hurts, but I'm fine."

Jenny was grinning like she knew a secret, mischievous and broad. Leo didn't trust that look. "So, what exactly did you do last night?" she asked when Thatchery had moved across the room to a table at the back.

Leo paused in gathering up a Nuka-Cola and fresh Mirelurk cakes. Thatchery had been going there for long enough that Leo knew what his regular lunch meal was. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

"Yes, I would." She tried to hide her grin behind her bottle of water. "Did you do what I think you did?"

"Depends on what you think we did." He moved away to set Thatchery's lunch down. "I can sit with you."

Thatchery brought his feet down off of the chair opposite his and smiled at Leo. He passed Leo something over the table. "I want you to have this."

It was the Quantum cap pendant. The inside was rusted, and there were two dates scratched there, silver beneath the rust. The second one looked more recent, just below the first one.

"Why? You always wear this."

Thatchery shrugged. "It's like a promise, I guess. That I'll come back."

Leo picked it up and rubbed his thumb over the first date. "What's this for?"

"It's the date I left the vault for the first time." He smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling. "The day I moved into town."

"And the second one?"

Thatchery ducked his head and dug his fork into a flaky cake. "Carved it this morning, to remember, uh, you know..."

Leo smiled and slipped the cord over his head, let the Quantum cap settle against his chest.

"You know, my... my dad would've approved of you, I think." He smiled almost shyly. "He never really approved of this, but he said he wanted me to find someone who cares about me the way he cared about my mom."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. He always loved my mom, said she loved me, but she died before I could meet her. He said I was a lot like her. He said she was smart and kind and gentle." He frowned. "I'm glad I take after her. He wasn't nice, not really."

"Neither was my dad. But my mom was amazing. She loved all of us, even my dad, even for all his flaws and the handful of caps he was worth."

"Are you the oldest?"

Leo smiled and dropped his gaze to pick at a spot where the enamel was chipping from the table. "Yeah. Dad's least favorite, I think. He wasn't fond of me and Andy, but he loved Jenny to pieces." He saw Jenny turn to look at him out of the corner of his eye, saw her own eyes wide. "Dad thought I spent too much of my time reading poetry with her and helping her cook instead of hunting dogs."

"You read poetry?"

"She taught me all the best ones. How to shoot too, when I was ten." He sighed softly. "I miss her."

"Everyone misses their parents."

"Do you miss your dad?"

Thatchery's face turned a guilty sort of sour and he ducked his head. "Yes and no. My dad was never supportive of anything I did. He was always too busy with work, cared too much about the 'clean water for all' thing." He shook his head. "Every baseball game, he was never there. I made MVP, he was never there."

"MVP?"

"Most Valuable Player. I always had a natural talent for baseball, and medicine too, if I put my mind to it. But he didn't care." He shook his head. "He didn't care about me, not really. Not the way I tried to make myself believe he did. So, I guess I don't miss him. Not as much as I should. It's a dull ache when I think about him, when I see his lab coat folded in the bottom drawer of my desk, when I see his and Mom's wedding rings. But I don't cry."

Leo understood. It was a dull ache to think about his mom, with her auburn hair and hazel eyes, her happy smile and warm hugs. Eleven years and it still hurt, but the pain had faded after so long. What once hurt like being scorched had dulled to an ache. He didn't cry either, not anymore.

Leo reached for Thatchery's hand, squeezed his palm between his fingers. "You're not alone, all right?"

Thatchery smiled sadly and squeezed his fingers. "Thanks babe."

Leo couldn't help smiling at that. It was nice to be called that, to share a bed with someone who actually wanted to wake up next to him in the morning. It was something he could get used to, learning to love someone and be loved in return.

Thatchery cleared his throat. "So, you want to go shoot some raiders? I know a spot that they won't even see us from."

They ended up fooling around in Thatchery's sniping spot after only shooting down a few of the raiders occupying the school.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up.


	15. The Sun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thatchery was clutching Leo's hand tight in his, to the point that Leo could swear he felt bones shifting. He wasn't sure that Thatchery was even aware he was doing it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, look, another chapter. Um, this one is sorta filler. I'm psyched about the next chapter though. Butch is in it. How many of you guys like Butch?

"Do you remember those old android tapes?"

It was a simple enough question, Leo supposed.

"Yeah."

They were in the Lantern just after the lunch rush. Thatchery had ordered a beer and sat with Leo to 'distract him from impending boredom', as he'd said. Leo wasn't sure if the impending boredom was intended for him or for Thatchery.

Thatchery pushed scraps of paper into a small pile, torn from his beer bottle. "I'm heading to Rivet City tomorrow morning. Would you like to come?"

"Rivet City?" Leo hadn't been there in years. "Why?"

"All the clues I found point to Rivet City and a man named Pinkerton."

Pinkerton? "That name sounds familiar."

Thatchery tore a particularly large strip of paper into pieces. "He's an old recluse. A scientist." He shrugged and began to rearrange the scraps of paper into designs and patterns. "They think he's a ghost. I think he's locked himself up in the broken bow."

"What does he have to do with the android hoax?"

"It's not a hoax," Thatchery said, frowning. "It's _real_."

Leo looked down at the flower Thatchery had made from the paper, like something out of a pre-war picture book. "You don't know that."

Thatchery sighed. "Why would anyone make something like this up? Why would they make tapes like that?"

Leo sighed and covered one of Thatchery's hands with his own. "I know you want this to be real, but don't get your hopes up."

He looked hurt. "But those aliens were _real_ , just like the magazines in the vault said. And those guys at Paradise Falls believe in the legend of some ghost that follows a vault suit."

"Slavers are high half the time, Thatch. They believe in anything."

"But what about those aliens?" He pulled something from a holster at his hip and put it on the counter. It was a blaster, like something from a sci-fi book. A blue light emanated from the slot the ammunition cell was held. "You can't tell me I didn't see aliens."

"You got this from them?"

"I told you I had rifles and pistols." He dug in his pocket and deposited a few gems on the counter, glittering red and green and orange in the light. They were different sizes, but all the same cut. "I got these too."

"You walk around with this stuff in your pockets?"

Thatchery laughed and picked one of the bigger gems up. "I was going to go buy some explosives with these. I hate trying to count out caps." He put the gem back into the pile, right in the middle of a circle of green ones.

Leo watched him take the ammunition out of the blaster. "Okay, so you got these from aliens?"

"Yeah! They had all kinds of neat stuff!" He handed Leo the battery cell. "The blaster is a pain in the ass to use if you're trying to sneak, but it turns bad guys to ash! It's the coolest fucking thing!"

Leo couldn't help but smile to see how excited Thatchery was, how his eyes lit up. He showed Leo how to put the cell back into the blaster, and he pushed Leo's hand away when he tried to give it back.

"Keep it," he said. "I have five more in a locker." He ejected a tape from his Pip-Boy. "This is a tape called 'A Free Man... A New Man.' On it, this android says thank you to someone unidentified for referring him to Rivet City, to Pinkerton."

"You think it's true?"

Thatchery shrugged. "It sounds like something out of a science fiction book, I know, but I think this could be real. What if it is?"

"Then I was wrong."

Thatchery smiled then, white teeth straight and his eyes so bright. "Does that mean you're going with?"  
~  
Leo didn't like to think too much about it. It was depressing, kind of, to wonder if he was going to be all right in the future or not. If Thatchery would be all right.

Thatchery was reckless, lacking the basic preservation instincts that most Wasters had. He chucked grenades at raiders that were almost too close, throwing concrete back at Leo and himself. He didn't use the rifle at his back too often, said it overheated in his hands and made the air reek of plasma.

"That's a poor excuse."

Thatchery shrugged. "The only one I got."

Thatchery had given him three hundred alien power cells for the blaster, which was in perfect condition. Leo also had Stims in his pockets and his pack and the cells buried somewhere in his pack. He had pretty good aim with his little laser pistol and the blaster wasn't much different.

"So, I met this guy once." Thatchery was walking along a border on the highway, up eleven feet off the ground, his arms stuck out at his sides. "He was selling robots. It was the coolest thing. He said I could own my very own Mister Gutsy. I didn't have the two thousand caps at the time, so I couldn't buy a robot. And I've never seen him since. It's a shame; I could afford that robot now."

Thatchery was filled with childlike wonder for this new world he'd crawled up into. He was always in awe of everything around him, even if it was in ruins and nothing at all like the vault had promised him. He didn't seem to mind that the plants were dead, that the earth was dead too, because he always tried to make the best of things. Leo admired that about him. It was a rare thing in the Wasteland.

"What would you have done with another robot?"

He laughed. "Gutsys are the combat variants of Handys, so he would have been my robotic _bodyguard_ instead of my robotic butler." He hopped off of the concrete guard and took Leo's hand, laced their fingers together and held tight. "Wadsworth is nearly useless in combat, always complaining that he wasn't fit for fighting."

"They weren't made for it."

He grinned up at Leo. "Do you know more about robots than I do?"

Leo smiled too. "Maybe. Depends on how much you know."

"Next to nothing."

"Well, I can reprogram a Handy to do basic things, and I can get rid of the sarcasm modulator. I spent two years maintenancing a caravan's Handy, so I can do the basic stuff, I guess."

"Hm." He kicked at a pebble and sent it skittering across the broken concrete. "If Wadsworth has any problems, I'll have to ask you to take a look."

Leo chuckled. "It's been a few years."

"It's like riding a bike. You don't really forget."

Leo's nose crinkled. Riding a bike? He didn't understand. He glanced at Thatchery, who was looking around at the old buildings and humming a song Leo didn't recognize. Vault kids were odd, that was for sure.

Being raised underground had instilled weird beliefs in Thatchery, things Leo had noticed over time. Thatchery was always content with the world around himself, like he'd accepted that it was terrible. Maybe it was better than the vault. And he was always humming the songs from the radio, songs Three Dog had played thousands of times over. He was seemingly afraid of the sky, at least early in the morning when the sun was at its brightest like it was then. Thatchery was wearing sunglasses, called them lucky as he slid them over his eyes.

Thatchery was clutching Leo's hand tight in his, to the point that Leo could swear he felt bones shifting. He wasn't sure that Thatchery was even aware he was doing it.

"What's that you're humming?"

Thatchery turned his head toward him, but Leo couldn't see his eyes through the dark lenses. "Hmm?"

"You were humming a song. Three Dog doesn't play that one."

He turned his head away, toward the highway in front of them. "It... I heard it a long time ago..."

Leo frowned. Thatchery wasn't smiling anymore. His grip was still so tight on Leo's hand. Thatchery's palm was sweating between them, but he wouldn't let go. "Thatch?"

"It's nothing. From the vault." He frowned. "I didn't know I was humming it..."

Leo didn't press it further than that. It seemed to bother Thatchery. His hand was trembling where it clutched Leo's hand and he had fallen uncharacteristically silent. Leo was worried.

What was that song? If it was played in the vault, over the PA system, why was it so wrong for Thatchery to remember it? He seemed frightened almost. Of what, Leo wasn't sure. The past? Thatchery once said that his whole life had been a lie growing up, that he didn't know who or what to believe anymore.

Leo had heard of vaults using brainwashing techniques, subliminal messages tucked away in holovids projected on screens or hidden in the overseer's announcements over the PA system. 101 hadn't seemed like a vault that practiced brainwashing, but he wasn't the one who lived there for nineteen years. The vault was quiet and dark and desolate, but there had been nothing unusual.

"When was the last time you were in Rivet City?" Leo asked once the silence had become unbearable. He wanted to make small talk to try and take Thatchery's mind off of things.

He shrugged, just the barest movement of his small shoulders. "Few months. I talked to Doctor Li about Dad and then I brought Dad there, but I haven't been there since."

"Have you ever gone up to the bridge tower? You can see the whole Wasteland from up there."

Thatchery smiled a little. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. Have you ever seen the sun rise over everything? It's beautiful."

"Well, we'll have to see it then, huh?"  
~  
The trip was surprisingly uneventful. They'd only had to shoot a herd of mad Brahmin and a mole rat or two. They watched the sun set over the ruins of downtown D.C. from the rusted tower before Rivet City. It highlighted everything in hues of orange and pink, the horizon set ablaze by the setting sun.

"Wow," Thatchery breathed.

Leo smiled and squeezed Thatchery's wrist. His eyes were so bright, colored orange by the sun and sparkling with awe. "Beautiful, huh?" He wasn't necessarily talking about the sunset.

"Yeah..." Thatchery smiled up at him. "This was worth walking all day."

They waited until the sun had sunk below the broken horizon of the city to start for the bridge. It was already docked over the water below, the waves gentle and quiet. Thatchery yawned as they headed into the stairwell. Leo wouldn't mind renting a bed himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I mean, I dunno, I feel like 101 was sorta brainwashy? Just to make sure no one questioned the overseer and whatever, but Alphonse was just a bad overseer. He was terrible.
> 
> Comments and kudos are appreciated.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up.


	16. Just Let It Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The sound of Thatchery's fist connecting with Butch's face damn near echoed off of the walls. Blood leaked from Butch's nose and he clutched at it, cursing and whining. He wasn't as tough as he pretended he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really proud of this one. I'm proud of my baby, hitting Butch like that.
> 
> I hate the title.

They only ran into one person in the stairwell. She was drunk and she asked if they had seen her no good son. Thatchery told her to go home and sleep, but she shouted that she didn't have to listen to him. She stumbled into the middle deck corridor.

"Sorry. She, uh... She's the local drunk," Thatchery said. "She's kind of a bitch."

Leo pulled a face. "I guess every town has its share of weird people."

Thatchery smiled and took Leo's hand. "Come on."

Leo had thought that Thatchery was exhausted, but they headed down to a bar called the Muddy Rudder. They could hear shouting going on below, and there was the sound of glass breaking. There was a thud as someone fell to the floor.

Leo wished they had rented a room instead.

The bar was dark and dirty and the smell of stale cigarette smoke hung heavy in the air. Glass littered the floor and there was a man lying beneath the bar, blood dripping from a wound at the back of his head. There was a young man standing in the middle of the room, a switchblade held in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other. His leather jacket matched the one Thatchery had, even the large green snake on the back, and the vault-blue jumpsuit was unmistakable.

"Who else wants a piece of the Butchman, huh?"

Oh. Oh _no_.

"Butch!"

Thatchery sounded furious. His patience had worn out before they had even reached Rivet City. Leo had a feeling that the kid was about to snap.

"Well, look who it is! My best friend in the whole world!"

"I did not open that vault so that you could come out and pick fights!"

Leo put a hand between Thatchery's shoulder blades, hoping to calm him before he did something he would regret. Thatchery was impulsive and Butch a bad influence on that. If Leo had his way, they wouldn't be in the same room together. It would save Thatchery and himself from a lot of headaches and trouble.

"What, are ya gonna have your boyfriend here beat me up?"

Thatchery bristled. They had never really established what they were, but Leo supposed that boyfriend was an accurate enough term.

"You think I can't kick your ass?" He jerked a thumb in Leo's direction. "I can kick _his_ ass, Butch, and he's bigger than you!"

Leo could argue that, but it wasn't an argument he could win. Thatchery was scrappy, and he'd been out in the Wastes a lot more than Leo has recently. Thatchery's scars weren't just for show.

Butch walked up the stairs, stood on the step below Thatchery so that they were nose to nose. "Yeah? Prove it, Nosebleed."

"I'm not going to stoop to your level, Snake Breath."

Butch laughed, a loud, obnoxious sound. "Of course you won't, Nosebleed. You've always been too good for that."

Leo wasn't going to stop Thatchery from hitting Butch. The asshole deserved it.

"I've broken your nose before, don't think I won't do it again."

"You wouldn—"

The sound of Thatchery's fist connecting with Butch's face damn near echoed off of the walls. Blood leaked from Butch's nose and he clutched at it, cursing and whining. He wasn't as tough as he pretended he was.

Thatchery shook his hand out, hissing in pain and saying he wished he hadn't done that.

"What the fuck, Nosebleed?"

"I warned you, asshole!" He groaned. "Holy _shit_ , that hurt! It's like punching a fucking brick wall!"

Leo gently took Thatchery's hand and carefully checked for broken knuckles. They sure as hell were going to bruise, but he was fine.

"You're fine."

Thatchery laughed and squeezed Leo's fingers briefly. "Give me a Stimpak for Snake Breath here."

"Asshole," Butch muttered, even as Thatchery used the Stimpak to mend his nose.

"You're the asshole." He pinched the bridge of Butch's nose none-too-gently. "Should be fine."

Butch swatted his hand away. "Fuck you, man."

Thatchery grinned like it was amusing. "No thanks. You're not my type."

Leo had a strange feeling that their relationship had always been this way, with insults and fist fights. He wondered how many times Thatchery had broken Butch's nose.

"Come on, Vera's got an empty room we can rent for a couple of nights."

They left Butch on the staircase of the bar, his nose purple and still just a little bit crooked. Leo followed Thatchery up two short flights of stairs to the Upper Deck. The corridors were dim and a little bit dirty, the metal rusted in places on the walls. It was in remarkable shape for being half-sunk for two centuries. They turned a couple of corners and entered a room with a round wooden counter and a Mister Handy behind it.

"Hey Buckingham," Thatchery said. He leaned against the counter. "Can I get a room?"

"How long will you be staying, sir?"

"Uh, a week, maybe. I don't know yet." He pulled out a bag of caps. "I think this will cover the first three days? Maybe?"

"You didn't actually count it."

Thatchery grinned at Leo. "You're right, I did not. I could have, but that would've meant less time pestering you at the Lantern."

Mister Buckingham took the bag and tucked it into a shelf below a cash register that probably wasn't used anymore. "Thank you, sir. Your room is right down the hall."

"Thanks."

The room was small, but it had an actual bed. And it was queen sized, like the ones from before the war that married couples had. The sheets were clean, stark white against the dark gray metal of the walls. There was a table against the far wall and a wardrobe on the other side of the bed. The room smelled nice, like some soap that was supposed to smell like a fruit that probably didn't exist anymore. Leo wondered if the bed was much the same.

Thatchery put his pack on the table. "I'm pretty sure this is the nicest room on the boat. It has probably the nicest bed. No one really stays here, so I can pretty much guarantee that the bed is disease and bug free."

"How much is it a night?"

"One twenty. Vera makes a decent amount every time I show up." He sat on the edge of the bed. "Come on, it's late. We should get some sleep if we're gonna go find Pinkerton in the morning."

Leo closed the door and moved across the room to put his pack beside Thatchery's. He sat on the other side of the bed and unlaced his boots. He heard Thatchery unzip his vault suit behind him and then felt the blankets lift as he crawled beneath them. He joined Thatchery a few moments later, after he'd left his shirt and pants in a pile on the floor.

"Y'know, I probably could kick your ass," Thatchery mumbled. "But I don't think I'd ever have a reason to.

"I know." He kissed Thatchery's forehead. "Go to sleep."

Thatchery pressed closer, his arms sliding around Leo's waist and his legs sliding between Leo's. He fell asleep easily, easily enough to start snoring. Leo didn't mind; it was better than the creaking of the ship and the chittering of Mirelurks. He could hear them way below, their sounds echoing off of the rusted metal of the ship. He too fell asleep easily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up.


	17. Insignificant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They spent half the morning in bed tangled in the sheets. Thatchery had kept him there with soft words and a sleepy smile. Leo wasn't used to lazy mornings; he was always up by six to get everything prepared for the day at the Lantern. But Thatchery insisted that crotchety old men like Pinkerton slept until nearly ten in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yoooooooo
> 
> Would anyone be interested in a smut between these two? I mean, I'm gonna post it anyways, but that way I can like... set a vague deadline for myself of some sort. Just lemme know in the comments if y'all'd be interested in reading it sooner rather than later.

They spent half the morning in bed tangled in the sheets. Thatchery had kept him there with soft words and a sleepy smile. Leo wasn't used to lazy mornings; he was always up by six to get everything prepared for the day at the Lantern. But Thatchery insisted that crotchety old men like Pinkerton slept until nearly ten in the morning.

"That doesn't mean we should spend all morning here," Leo argued.

"Just a couple of hours, then?"

Leo sighed. He really wanted to say no. After all, he hadn't been to Rivet City in a while, was never there long enough to explore the old ship. He wanted to look around. Thatchery seemed to know the layout of the city well enough and he also seemed to like exploring.

But he couldn't say no to those damn puppy dog eyes Thatchery was making.

"All right. Just a couple of hours."

One thing he'd learned in just a few weeks was that Thatchery was a snuggler. He spent the next three hours in bed with Thatchery wrapped around him like he was going to float up to the ceiling if he didn't cling to Leo. Probably would. The kid didn't weigh much.

Thatchery's Pip-Boy beeped from somewhere to Leo's left, echoing in the room. Thatchery rolled over and popped open the footlocker. He had stuck his Pip-Boy in there just a few hours ago after he had played with the dials for a minute.

"It's nine," he said. He sounded defeated.

Leo suppressed a yawn. "Come on, we have time to get breakfast before the lunch rush."

They redressed in their clothes from the day before. Thatchery insisted they leave their packs in the room. He was going to lock the door anyway. He said they were going to be there for a couple of days.

They took their weapons, Thatchery's plasma rifle and Leo's alien blaster, and a few Stimpaks and bottle caps. Thatchery said maybe they'd stop at Flak and Shrapnel's for explosives. Maybe.

Gary's Galley wasn't busy when they got there. Gary's daughter sat them at a table in the corner by the stairs. They were brought their food, two Nuka-Colas, a plate of Mirelurk cakes for Thatchery and a bowl of stew for Leo.

"You make these better," Thatchery muttered around a bite of cake. "Specialty my ass."

Leo smiled into his Nuka. "Yeah?"

"They're rubbery here. He uses too many pre-war spices and shit." He drank some of the lukewarm cola. "How's your stew?"

Leo shrugged. "Could be better. It isn't warm."

"Yeah, but the colas are."

They finished their food in silence and Thatchery left Gary's daughter a decent tip despite their food being mediocre. Thatchery reached for his hand as they walked through the dimly lit marketplace.

"Do you want to stop for explosives?"

Leo looked at the weapons stall. "I don't use them."

Thatchery reached in his pocket. "I think I brought enough for some ammo. I need some more MF cells, I think. If we're gonna be trying to kill Lurks."

"Is that what's in the Broken Bow?"

"Yeah. Lurks and crotchety old scientists."

The man in security armor near the weapons stall was eyeing Leo like he was a troublemaker. He was only a little bit taller than Leo was, with short brown hair and a clean shaven face. He also had a plasma rifle.

Shit, did everyone have those?

"Higgins," he said.

Thatchery looked up from counting caps. "Yeah Chief?"

He was looking at Leo when he asked, "Why is it that you keep bringing people onto my ship?"

"Aw, Leo isn't that bad. He isn't going to cause trouble."

"And what about the other vault kid?"

Thatchery sighed. "Butch wasn't supposed to come here, Chief. I thought that if he left the vault, he'd go to Megaton and he'd be Moriarty's problem. Or that he just wouldn't leave the vault."

"He's caused this city more trouble than Cantelli."

"How is he, by the by?"

"Improving." He looked like he didn't have any patience for Thatchery today. "Is he going to cause trouble?"

Thatchery frowned. "You have my word that this one won't cause any trouble, Chief."

He arched a brow. "And if he is I can throw both of you over the side of the ship?"

Thatchery pulled a face. "Uh, yeah. Sure. Why not?"

"He throws people off the ship?" Leo asked quietly.

"Yeah. That's Security Chief Harkness. He takes his job really serious." Thatchery pulled him toward the weapons stall. "He threw Butch off the ship once. Butch didn't shut up about the water fucking up his hair and warping his jacket, apparently."

Leo looked around the stall while Thatchery talked prices with the only guy there, a balding man with a handlebar mustache. All of the weapons were in lousy condition; baseball bats that looked like they were about to split in half with one hit, assault rifles that weren't guaranteed to fire even one round. He had plenty of explosives, all locked inside a glass case. Most were fragmentation grenades and mines, but Leo saw a few pulse grenades and a plasma mine.

The shopkeeper had a gruff voice as he asked Thatchery, "He gonna buy anything?" with a jerk of his head in Leo's direction.

Leo looked up to see Thatchery looking up at him from counting caps. "No."

Thatchery dropped a handful of caps on the counter and picked up the small steel case of ammunition. He handed Leo a box of 5.56 and he slung a Chinese assault rifle over his shoulder.

"Bought this just in case," he explained. He dumped the contents of the case into the bag at his hip and left the case on the counter. He reached for Leo's hand again. "Ready to go talk to a grouchy old scientist?"

"It's what I live for," he joked.

They were halfway across the bridge when they heard boots on the salvaged metal.

"Nosebleed, wait up!"

Leo stopped only because Thatchery did. He had a feeling that Butch was going to ask to tag along.

"Where ya goin'?"

"We're going to talk to Pinkerton."

"Can I come with?"

Leo scoffed and rolled his eyes. He looked away from them, to the east, at the decaying city ruins.

Thatchery sighed. "Uh, I guess. Just don't fuck anything up, man. Pinkerton already doesn't like visitors."

Great. Butch was a nuisance. He'd only bother them and Pinkerton. Because of him, Pinkerton would hold out on information. Leo could practically guarantee that.

"So, there's two ways in," Thatchery said as he led them down the stairs and out of the husk of the metal building. "We can jump in the river and swim."

Leo was confused when Thatchery didn't say anything else. "I thought you said two?"

Thatchery shrugged. "Well, I figured you guys would go with option number two anyways. You don't even have to know what it is. You can already guess that it's infinitely better than swimming in the irradiated lake."

"Is it?" Butch asked.

"It is, actually. You know why?" He paused. "Well, do you?"

Butch hummed like he was actually thinking about it. Leo wondered if the delinquent had ever given anything much thought. "Because it ain't swimming?"

"Exactly, my serpentine friend."

"Serpen-what?"

Leo even knew what that was and he didn't receive a fancy vault education. "He means—"

"Don't tell him," Thatchery cut in. "It's more fun if you let him be confused."

"This is why I beat the snot outta you when we were kids," Butch said.

"And if you try it again, you'll get _your_ ass kicked." Thatchery bumped Leo with his shoulder. "By this guy, no less. Shit, look at his arms."

"Knock it off." He wasn't really annoyed. "I won't give you free food anymore." He didn't really mean that.

Thatchery pouted, his eyes wide. "Aw, don't be that way."

Leo hated that face. He always did, ever since Jenny found out he was a sucker for puppy eyes. He could never say no to her when she pulled that face. Now Thatchery would figure it out. Fuck.

"Thatch—"

"It was actually a compliment."

"Yuck!" Butch made a retching noise. "Can't you two keep this shit behind closed doors?"

Thatchery snorted and pulled Leo down for a kiss. Butch gagged, and it sounded like maybe he really was going to throw up. Thatchery was laughing against Leo, his shoulders shaking, his laughter bubbling out between them.

"I live to ruin your day, Butch," he said. He smiled up at Leo and they continued walking.

Leo wasn't sure where they were going. There was a super mutant camp ahead. He remembered it from yesterday when they snuck past it. There was a minigun up there and someone crying for help. They couldn't have helped her if they tried.

He reached for Thatchery's hand, lacing their fingers together.

There was a building up ahead with large tubes sticking out into the water. But they turned down to walk along a walkway made of uneven metal grates. They were over the water, murky with radiation and just barely reflecting the bright white clouds overhead.

"Snake Breath," Thatchery said as they neared the door. "Do you have any bobby pins?"

Butch's face flushed. "Why you askin' me?"

"You _are_ a hairdresser." He shook his head. "Y'know, whatever. I'll just grab mine. I just thought we'd be in sooner if you weren't such an asshole."

Leo reluctantly let Thatchery's hand go so the vaultie could dig through his bag. Butch stuck his hands into his pockets and kicked a pebble into the water.

"Don't," Thatchery said.

Butch frowned at him. "Why not?"

"Lurks."

Butch gave Leo a questioning look. "What?"

Leo sighed. "There's Mirelurks in the water, Butch. You could disturb one and then what?"

"We kill it."

"You have a ten mil."

Thatchery knelt in front of the door, eye level with the lock. "He has a point."

They were silent as Thatchery stuck a bobby pin into the lock along with the head of a rusted screwdriver. He twisted the pin at different angles with the screwdriver to try and pop the lock open.

Leo didn't know anything about this. He never had a reason to pick a lock, really. The caravan business was honest work, so he never had to steal, not even to feed his addiction.

There was a snapping sound and Thatchery swore. He pulled the broken hairpin from lock and dropped it to the floor. "Butch, give me one."

"One what?"

"Bobby pin."

"I don't have one."

Thatchery glared up at him. "Listen asshole, that was the only one I had with me and I know you have some. Chief told me about all the trouble you get into. That means you have bobby pins, shithead."

"Fine Nosebleed." Butch threw a few of the small hairpins at him. "There's your dumb fucking bobby pins."

Thatchery opened the door on his third attempt. Leo wanted to shove Butch into the water while they were waiting, but he decided not to. He wouldn't do it only because Thatchery wouldn't have appreciated it. They were friends, even if the relationship wasn't a good thing.

Thatchery went in first. Leo watched him disarm a mine placed there and take some ammunition and medical supplies. He flipped a switch by the door once Butch had closed it, explaining that it was to keep the door from locking every time it closed.

"Don't let your guard down," Thatchery said as he drew his rifle.

Leo didn't like to hear the chittering and clicking that echoed off of the walls. He drew his blaster and the three of them started quietly through open doors. Their footsteps echoed too, very quietly, but the chittering turned curious. They could hear something moving around below them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to cut this short. I feel like it's run too long.
> 
> Comments and kudos are appreciated.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up.


	18. Crazy Words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. 'Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened.'" - Peter 3:13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shimmy-shimmy cocoa puffs, this is too overdue. I'm so sorry you guys. I've had a busy week, preparing for graduation and whatnot. BUT here it is! Sorry.
> 
> Side note: I am not religious, but there _is a lot_ of Bible references and all of that in-game, so I am probably going to toss a lot of those into this weird salad.

There was a Mirelurk beneath the stairs, almost like it was guarding the way up. Thatchery whispered that the stairs went up to where they needed to be, that Pinkerton was up there. So he pulled his plasma rifle from his back and made sure it was loaded. He took a deep, shaking breath. He was frightened.

Leo reached forward to squeeze Thatchery's arm briefly, just to let him know that they were right there. Butch may have been less than helpful so far, but Leo was ready to help Thatchery. His blaster only needed to be aimed and the trigger pulled.

The Mirelurk didn't see Thatchery, not immediately, but Leo saw the fear on Thatchery's face when it did. He fired once, twice, three times. The body sailed to a stop at his feet, the slimy shell skittering into his knees. Thatchery fell backwards, his rifle dropping onto the floor, as he released a deep, shaking breath.

"I'm okay," he mumbled when Leo moved forward. He grabbed his rifle and stood on wobbling legs. "Come on," he muttered as he started for the stairs.

Butch went in front of them, touching everything within his reach and even some stuff that wasn't. Leo held Thatchery's hand in his, felt his fingers trembling between his own. His palms were cold and a little bit sweaty.

"Thatch?"

"Hmm?"

Leo ducked his head to quietly ask, "Are you okay?"

Thatchery exhaled through his teeth. "Mirelurks make me nervous."

Leo understood why he might say that. It was normal to fear things in the Wasteland. A lot of people were afraid of deathclaws, himself included. Just like people were afraid of Mirelurks.

Thatchery was muttering something beneath his breath as they walked, Butch ahead of them. Leo had heard it from Confessor Cromwell, but his had differed slightly from this one. From the Bible, then? Like the one his father used to read, used to smack he and Andy with when they'd gone against his word.

"Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. 'Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened.'"

Leo recognized it from the book of Peter. His father had always liked to quote the Bible at them when they were children, always spouting old phrases about war and famine and fear. He didn't have the fondest memories of his father.

Thatchery squeezed Leo's hand briefly before releasing it to disarm a rigged shotgun inside one of the rooms. He stuffed the gun into his pack along with a couple of shells. He moved across to a counter, where he disarmed a mine placed beside a box of ammunition.

"Did you ever meet Pinkerton?" Thatchery asked.

"Ah, no. People were already starting those ghost rumors when I'd passed through here. I didn't bother to see if they were true or not."

Thatchery shook his head. "I think those people just don't have a whole lot better to do, so they make up stories." He handed Leo a bottle of purified water and crammed the rest of them into his bag. "I think they don't know what happened to him so they call him a ghost, but he's just a grumpy old scientist. There aren't any ghosts."

"I don't know. There were a lot of people who died in the war and a lot of people who died after."

Thatchery shrugged. "I guess I need proof."

Leo heard Butch's boots stomping down the hall toward them and then he appeared in the doorway. Black soot was smudged across his cheeks and he was breathing hard. "You didn't think about tellin' me there was a terminal that was gonna blow up?"

"I didn't know you could set one to do that," the blond said.

"Well, ya can. It almost blew my fuckin' fingers off."

Leo looked away before he said something that would spark a flame underneath Butch's ass. He still thought it, but he wouldn't say it.

Thatchery's fingers at his wrist pulled him away from the thought of Butch's fingers missing. He was smiling at him.

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah. Thinking."

Thatchery nodded in the direction of the door and they followed Butch down the corridor to the room where the terminal was in. They stepped over a fallen bookshelf and a pile of junk items strewn around the floor. There was a Nuka-Cola machine that was tipped over, the bottles that tumbled out broken long ago. The busted terminal was on the counter in the next room, sitting right next to a sealed door.

Thatchery looked at the terminal with Butch, poking at all the exposed wires and components inside with a pencil from his pocket. Leo looked around the room while they talked about terminals. He had never pegged Butch as the smart type, the one who was good at science and technology. But there he was, talking to Thatchery about how complicated it was to rig a terminal to explode.

There was a switch opposite the door. The red button was lit up, probably the brightest thing in the room besides the vault kids' Pip-Boys. As curious as he was, Leo didn't think it would be a good idea to press it. It could have been a trap, like the terminal was.

"Hey! You found the button!" Thatchery practically skipped across the room to him. He stuck his pencil into Leo's pocket. "That's gotta be it, right?"

Leo wasn't sure. "I don't know."

Thatchery reached up, his fingers hovering over the green button. "Well, I mean, if the terminal was a bust, this has gotta be it. The door is triggered somewhere else."

"If you're wrong, I'll kill ya Nosebleed!"

"We'll all be dead, so you won't have a chance." And without leaving any room for further argument, he pressed the button.

They all waited for grenades to fall from some hidden compartment in the ceiling. Instead, there was the sound of a lock clicking open behind them. The door swung open on creaking hinges into another room, this one large and full of equipment. It was lit up with bright lights salvaged from what was likely a clinic.

There was no one in sight when they went inside. There was a counter with a lot of bits of metal and recovered components of robots and rifles. There was a pile of bottle caps beside the junk that Butch scooped up and stuffed into his pockets. A skeleton behind a privacy screen caught Leo's eye and he shuddered. It was so decayed that it looked to have been there for years. Was that Pinkerton?

"Hello?" Thatchery called out.

A door opened upstairs and a figure came out to stare at them over the balcony. "Who are you and what do you want?" asked a sharp voice.

Thatchery peered up at the figure. "Uh, we're looking for Pinkerton? Scientist guy, older."

"Older than the three of you combined," the man said. There were boots on the metal stairs. It had to be Pinkerton, wearing dirty Waster's clothes with a rifle on his back. He was an elderly man with more wrinkles than joints with arthritis. "What the hell do you want bothering an old man who obviously wants to be left alone?"

Thatchery dug around in his pack. "Uh, so, you heard about that android, right?"

Pinkerton scoffed. "What are you talking about, boy? I don't know anything about any of that. And a... what did you call it? An android?"

The tape clicked into Thatchery's Pip-Boy and the blond stared at Pinkerton with an unreadable expression.

_"Despite the harshness of the Wasteland, I've discovered in more than a few here, a compassion that is unheard of in the Commonwealth. Perhaps it’s the daily struggle for life here which gives appreciation for life in general, whether human, or android. In a few days I’ll be a free man... a new man. Let me say thank you now, for referring me to Pinkerton at Rivet City, because I will not remember any of this soon."_

"Fine, whatever," Pinkerton scowled. "This android, calls himself Harkness now, came in wanting a memory job. So I took new memories and replaced his old ones. Don't believe anyone's done that before. Certainly not down here. That Commonwealth tech isn't all that fancy."

"Harkness?"

"Yeah. Tall fella. Brown hair, blue eyes."

Thatchery nodded. "Yeah. I know him."

"You want proof? I documented the whole thing." He pointed a gnarled finger toward the privacy screens where the gurney with the skeleton was. There was a wall mounted terminal there, its screen dark. "I kept it so that I could rub it the face of Doctor Li when I need to rankle her feathers. I hate that snooty bitch."

Thatchery was moving toward the terminal. "Uh-huh, yeah, she is a bitch."

"You're damn right she is. She ruined my whole goddamn life."

Thatchery stuck his hand into Leo's pocket and withdrew his pencil. He used the sharp end to pop open the cable port on the terminal. "Mind if I plug my Pip-Boy in?"

"Hell, take the pictures and this holotape. Just don't go telling Harkness. He won't believe you anyway." He handed Leo the tape. "And you really don't want to see him upset. He can be... inhospitable."

Thatchery hooked his Pip-Boy into the terminal. "There's something you aren't telling me, isn't there?"

Pinkerton's scowl deepened. "So maybe I didn't wipe his mind like he asked me to. But I buried it deep! Almost as good. But it's still accessible. All you need is his recall code. Just say 'Activate A3-21 Recall Code Violet' and that'll Activate the hidden subroutines."

"That's it?" He pressed a few keys on the keyboard and unhooked his Pip-Boy. "Thank you, Pinkerton."

They left the room and Leo pressed the button to close the door. If the old man wanted to be alone, then Leo would close the door for him. He wasn't even sure if Mirelurks went up that far to that area. It didn't seem that way; none of the traps had been set off, none of the ones they found at least.

They were quiet on the way out. Even Butch was quiet, not even making some stupid joke about the way the place smelled. Thatchery had stuck a stick of gum in his mouth while Leo was closing Pinkerton's door. Leo smelled it on his breath, tasted it when Thatchery's lips pressed against his outside.

"If I had known you were into guys—"

"Butch, if you finish that sentence, so help you God..."

"I would have asked you to our prom."

Thatchery slammed his fist twice into Butch's shoulder. "I fucking told you not to finish that sentence," he said when Butch cried out in pain. "Dammit Butch, if you listened once in a while, you wouldn't be getting your ass kicked so often."

"I let you kick my ass because ya always used to go cryin' to your dad."

Thatchery snorted. "I wasn't no Daddy's Boy, Butch," he said, punching Butch in the arm again. Butch hissed and rubbed at the spot. He was definitely going to bruise. "He only found out because you left bruises and cuts where he could see them, asshole. That was your own fault."

Butch punched Thatchery's arm this time. "It was your fault for being a fucking nerd."

"Hey," Leo interjected. "You're both beautiful, ladies. You don't need to fight."

"You don't have a say in this, Rusty," Butch sneered.

Rusty? What the hell kind of nickname is that?

"Butch, I'll break your nose again," Thatchery warned. "And I won't give you a Stimpak this time."

"Stop fighting," Leo said sternly. "You're both adults, so start acting like it."

"Sorry," Thatchery mumbled. Butch just frowned and looked away.

If he knew he was going to have to babysit these two, he wouldn't have come along.  
~  
Leo hadn't gone to the marketplace with Thatchery later that night. Thatchery had wanted to help Harkness get rid of some guy named Zimmer, some guy who had been pestering everyone about the android. Thatchery had said that Leo could go ahead to their room, since it was late and Leo had been awake since before the sun was up. He said he would be a while, since he was going to go take care of Zimmer too.

Thatchery came back late. Leo wasn't sure what time it was, but he'd been alone for at least a couple of hours. He had been sketching on a piece of wrinkled paper torn from a book Thatchery had given him, a book where all of the words had been worn away by time, with the pencil the blond had left in his pocket. Thatchery had a second plasma rifle cradled in his arms, which he left on the bed so that he could properly lock the door.

"Hey," Thatchery mumbled.

"How was it?"

"He threatened to throw me off the ship, and then he gave me his rifle if I would take care of Zimmer."

Leo almost didn't want to ask what he did. "Did you ask him to leave?"

"Uh, I tried." He sat on the edge of the bed and started to unlace his boots. "His bodyguard got hostile with me and he tried to shoot my head off. So I... I had to kill them. Turns out the bodyguard was an android, though."

Leo set his sketch down on the floor along with the pencil. "Thatch, I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "No, it's fine. I did what I had to. Harkness needed this to be taken care of."

Leo folded his arms around Thatchery and tucked his chin against Thatchery's shoulder. "You're all right?"

"Yeah. Ready for sleep, I think."

Leo released him so he could kick off his boots and toss his jumpsuit to the floor. Leo shucked his pants too, along with his shirt. He'd already left his boots by the door. Thatchery was already comfortable beneath the blankets by the time Leo had flicked the light off. He was tired too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I'm sure you can tell, I am still ignoring canon as if it was never even there. I will continue to do so as I need to.
> 
> Comments and kudos are appreciated.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up.


	19. So Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was going to be a lazy afternoon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't actually know how cigarettes work because I've never smoked one. Also, I'm sorry, but I think all my updates are going to be inconsistent for the next few weeks.

It was going to be a lazy afternoon. Neither of them wanted to make the trip back to Megaton just yet. Leo liked the peace and quiet of Rivet City and Thatchery liked that no one bothered him. It was a nice place, quiet even with the creaking and groaning of the ship. It had been unnerving at first, but Leo had adjusted to it. It would be weird to leave it.

Butch hadn't bothered them all day. Not yet, at least. If Leo could have his way, Butch wouldn't bother them ever again.

Thatchery said that he wanted to spend the late morning hours out on the flight deck as they went up the rusted stairs.

Thatchery scrambled up on top of one of the jets out on the flight deck. It was rusty and the protective window on the cockpit had been cracked, but Leo crawled up beside Thatchery. They leaned against the dark glass, warmed by the April sun. He pulled a beer out of either pocket and handed one to Leo. It wasn't even noon yet and they were drinking.

The sun was warm overhead and there was a breeze blowing easy over the water, warm and salty against their faces. The weather was nice, nicer than Megaton, even though it was muggy. Leo definitely liked it by the ocean better than in the middle of the desert the bombs had created of the Capital. The view over the ruined city was amazing here.

Thatchery pressed against his side as he popped open his beer. "When do you think we should head back?"

Leo pressed the cap from his own beer into Thatchery's palm. "Maybe a couple of days."

Thatchery chuckled quietly as he stuck the caps into his pocket. "You're not ready to leave yet either?"

"No. It's nice here."

"I like the weather better out here. Warmer." He produced a switchblade from his pocket and started cutting patterns into his beer's paper label.

Leo watched him cut lines into the paper. Line after line, some intersecting and some connecting, until he had the crude outline of a rifle. He carved a flower beside that, though it didn't look like one at first, not until he'd said it was a flower the pre-war world called a lotus.

Leo remembered picture books of flowers that his mother had. The lotus was her favorite flower, even if she'd never seen one in real life. She said it resembled enlightenment and purity. He wasn't really sure what significance that could have held post-war, but she loved it.

"Hey, you ever seen a car blow up?"

Leo could honestly say that he had, once, when he was a caravan hand. They had been somewhere north near the Commonwealth and fighting off a deathclaw attack. The deathclaws were meaner up north, more irradiated. There had been a pile of cars nearby that he'd accidentally set on fire with his shotgun. It killed the deathclaw, which was pretty wicked, but he had nearly been fired right there for almost killing the Brahmin. It was amazing to see the explosion, but the buzz of the radiation afterwards had made him feel queasy.

"It's been a while."

Thatchery picked at the label of his beer. "There's a parking lot off of the flight deck. There's a ton of cars there."

"Is that one of your hobbies?"

"Not much else to do in the Wastes." He slid off of the jet and grabbed his new rifle from where he'd left it leaning against the nose. "Come on, I'll show you."

Thatchery led him across the deck to a spot overlooking shallow waters to the south and a parking just below them. They set their beers down a little ways away from the edge so that the explosions wouldn't shatter the glass. Thatchery shifted his rifle, the butt against his shoulder and the sights lined up with his eye. The first shot at a damaged Corvega didn't do anything, but the second shot sparked fire beneath the hood.

Thatchery pushed him back with a hand on his chest and they moved backwards a little ways. The engine made a sort of _bang!_ sound and a piece of the hood flew up. A few moments later, there was a loud explosion and a mushroom cloud higher than the flight deck puffed up, dark gray with orange burning bright in the middle.

"Isn't it amazing?" Thatchery asked with a grin wider than the Potomac. He was laughing, his eyes so bright.

Leo was laughing too, in a breathless sort of amazed way. It was beautiful, the color of the fire and the soft smoke around it. "Yeah."

Thatchery handed him the rifle. "See if there's another one?"

They went back to the edge. The prickle of radiation along his skin made Leo cringe, the ticking of Thatchery's Pip-Boy too, but he lined the rifle up with a car that sat atop a pile of other ones. They ignored the door that creaked open as the engine caught fire. They probably shouldn't have ignored the door.

"Do I have to pitch the two of you off the side of the ship?"

They both turned to see Harkness standing there. His arms were folded across his chest and his eyes were narrowed at them. Thatchery chuckled nervously and reached back to push down on the barrel of the rifle, to point it at the floor.

"Hey Chief."

"You're scaring the children."

 **Boom!** The car blew up, whipping their hair forward and making Leo's skin crawl with radiation. He felt the heat at his back, too close to them. Leo pointed the rifle at the deck, felt it bump the metal. Shit, they were in trouble. He knew he shouldn't have let Thatchery do this. It was such a bad idea.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Uh, just clearing away debris from your city."

Harkness frowned at them. "Those cars are too close to the ship. You could hurt someone."

Leo held the rifle out for Thatchery to take, the barrel pointed toward the floor. He had clicked the safety on. "We shouldn't have done this," he muttered.

Thatchery scoffed as he took the rifle back, yanked it from Leo's hand. "You agreed!"

"Just don't do it again," Harkness said. His tone left no room for argument.

Thatchery sighed as the door shut behind the chief. "Well, there goes our fun." He picked up his beer. "What do you want to do now?"

Leo picked up his own beer. "I don't know."

They leaned against the railing looking toward the northwest. Thatchery handed Leo his beer for a second to light a cigarette. Leo was looking toward the building across the river. Thatchery took his beer from Leo's hand and blew smoke out toward the sky.

"That's the Jefferson Memorial."

Leo glanced at Thatchery before turning back. The Memorial was surrounded by an energy fence, one taller than the actual building. There were people milling around inside, moving crates and large cages around. Even from that far Leo could see that most of them were wearing suits of power armor, but not like the ones the Brotherhood had.

"That's the Enclave down there." Thatchery sighed and flicked ash. "That was the site of Project Purity. The Enclave took it over not long after Li's scientists showed up, along with me and my father."

"Why? What was Project Purity?"

"My mother's dream and my father's goal. Something that was supposed to bring clean water to the Wasteland. I thought it was a fool's dream, but Dad said all he needed was a GECK, once we'd fixed the facility." He scoffed and took a drag. "He meant when I'd fixed it. But the Enclave got there before we could finish up."

Leo remembered Thatchery talking about the Project, just a little bit. He took the cigarette when Thatchery offered it. "What did they want?"

"They want to control the water. I think they're planning something, but what are they going to do? Infect the water to kill radiation or something?" He leaned against the railing, his beer bottle dangling precariously over the water where it was held loosely between his hands. "They tried to kill me."

Leo inhaled smoke and passed the cigarette back. He let the smoke bite at his lungs, liked the burn of it. The nicotine stuck to his teeth and was thick at the back of his throat. "For water?"

"Water is everything out here, apparently."

Leo felt himself shaking. They killed Thatchery's dad, tried to kill him, over a bit of water? "I didn't think it would be something to spill blood over."

"Neither did I. But I've been wrong about a lot of things since leaving the vault. Before leaving the vault." He turned to smile at Leo. "I'm glad I wasn't wrong about you, Leo."

"What have you been wrong about?"

"Uh, it depends on what you want to ask that about. Friends, relationships, other people. Shit, I always thought Butch was only into ladies, but I was wrong about that."

Leo did have a question about something that was bothering him. Had been since the vault. "Okay, can I ask you about that guy in the vault? The one that was avoiding you?" He didn't mention how he'd noticed Thatchery avoiding the other in turn.

Thatchery looked away from him, out toward the Memorial. "Uh, we... He and I have sort of a... a past, I guess. I dunno. We were stupid kids, you know?"

"You avoided each other because you did stupid things together?"

"Well, yeah, but not the stupid things you're thinking of." He shook his head. "It wasn't cherry bombs in the toilets and stealing personal property. It was... It was a lot of what you and I are doing. Sharing a bed, holding hands, that sort of shit. Except he didn't know what he wanted and I did."

"It didn't end well?"

"No. He... got a girlfriend. That blonde girl he was with. He still came to me, slept in my bed sometimes, but he didn't want me anymore." He shook his head. "Let's not talk about the past, huh? Life's too short to look back."

"So you don't have any questions about my past?"

He shrugged and flicked the cigarette into the water. "I dunno."

"Did you just not want to talk about that anymore?"

"Ah, no." He smiled crookedly up at Leo. "Maybe we could talk about which cigarettes are better, or scotch versus wine. I don't... Sorry. It's just that some things are still too fresh."

Leo reached for one of Thatchery's hands hanging over the railing. He slid their fingers together and squeezed gently. "We can talk about something else."

They were silent. At least for a while. They listened to the gulls screeching, fighting for food, and the water lapping gently against the hull. It wasn't awkward or uncomfortable.

"Okay, one question," Thatchery said finally. He craned his neck to look up at Leo. "Have you ever been with someone else like you are with me?"

Leo smiled. "No."

Thatchery smiled too and pressed into Leo's side. He laid his head on Leo's shoulder and sighed softly. Leo kissed the top of his head. It was nice out there, just the two of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What is canon??
> 
> Comments and kudos are appreciated.
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com) if anyone is interested in hitting me up.


	20. I Fell in Love Today

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why was he doubting Thatchery?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, finally, huh? I just finished checkout this morning, so I am officially no longer a high school student. I want to die.

They didn't do anything for the rest of the day. Harkness had apparently established a 'no fun' rule after what had happened with the cars, so they wandered around the ship and took potshots at things that swam around in the water. But they were bored after dinner. Thatchery had flopped onto their bed and started tossing a baseball he'd purchased in the market up toward the ceiling.

"I'm bored."

"You've said that a lot in the last thirty minutes."

Thatchery paused to flick on the radio on his Pip-Boy, the volume low, before he resumed his baseball tossing. "You know, we could do something fun."

"Thanks, but I don't want to be thrown off the side of the ship today." He sat beside Thatchery and buried a hand in the pile of thick curls atop his head. "Just read a book or something."

"Yeah, I mean, I could, but I have like five cherry bombs in this footlocker that are just begging to be dropped in a toilet or down a stairwell."

"No." He tugged on Thatchery's hair. "You'll get tossed off the ship."

"Aw, are you worried about me catching hypothermia?"

"Thatch, it's May. The worst you'll get is a cold."

"But you don't want me to be thrown overboard?"

Leo sighed. Jesus Christ, he wasn't going to stop with this, was he? "No, I don't."

Thatchery laughed victoriously, as if he'd just won some fight. "I knew you liked me for something other than my good looks and my ability to whisk you away from Megaton on neat adventures."

Leo couldn't not laugh at that. The adventures weren't that great. But maybe he couldn't argue with the good looks part, even if Thatchery's nose was crooked in two places and his smile was always lopsided. "I think you're exaggerating, just a little bit."

"Only a little bit."

A knock on the door interrupted them. "Higgins?"

Thatchery handed Leo the baseball and rolled off of the bed. He pulled the door open to a security guard, a woman with brown waves cropped short around her face. "Danvers?"

She patted her thigh and there was the sound of claws clicking against metal. "This mutt wouldn't stop whining at the stairwell door until someone let him in. And then at the door to the Upper Deck." A large dog squeezed in past Thatchery and jumped onto the bed. It was Dogmeat. His fur was damp and his snout had a fresh cut across the top. His breath smelled like blood when he started to pant. "I take it he's yours."

"Oh, don't be so sour, Lana," Thatchery grinned. "How can you be sour when there's a dog in the room?"

Danvers was still unamused, her expression blank. "Right. Okay. Harkness doesn't want to that dog to be left unsupervised in the city." She turned and left without another word, without bidding them a goodnight. She was colder than Harkness was.

"Well." Thatchery closed the door. "She's sour."

Leo groaned as Dogmeat rolled over on top of him. Holy shit, he was heavy. Probably heavier than Thatchery was. "How did he get here?"

Thatchery sat beside them and lifted one of Dogmeat's front paws. "Well, his feet are muddy, so he probably swam across the Potomac."

"He smells like he did."

Dogmeat whined and dragged his tongue, thick and wet, across Leo's face. Ugh, his breath smelled horrid.

"Hey, at least he loves you." He scratched behind one of Dogmeat's ears. "I thought I left you at home," he said in a low voice he only used to speak to the dog. "What are you doing here, silly duck?"

Home. Megaton was his home? That shithole full of even shittier people? How? The radiation was thick in the air there, thick in the food. Anytime Leo passed close to the bomb, radiation prickled sharp up his body, made the hair on his arms stand up. That was home to Thatchery?

"Hey," Thatchery said softly. He pushed Dogmeat off of Leo. "You okay? You got all quiet and... pensive."

Pensive? "No, I'm fine." He squeezed Thatchery's thigh. "I was thinking about how you said home."

Thatchery smiled then, small and shy. "Oh, yeah. Home." He leaned down to kiss him. "Yeah, I mean, I guess Megaton _is_ home."

That was an amazing thing to hear. Thatchery thought of Megaton as home, even if it was a shitty place. Leo wondered if maybe he was the reason Thatchery liked Megaton, but the thought flitted away as quickly as it had come. He was just hoping now. Thatchery was probably homesick still, missing the vault, and Megaton was the closest place there. He probably didn't like Megaton at all.

Leo really couldn't blame him. Megaton wasn't the great village that Rivet City was. Not even the people were that great. Maybe Moira, who was so sweet, and of course Jenny, who was a fucking angel, and maybe Gob, who seemed to be sweet on Thatchery. Maybe Thatchery was sweet on Gob too. Fuck.

Why was he doubting Thatchery?

"You're doing it again." Thatchery ran his fingers through Leo's hair. It was soothing. "What's up?"

"I'm just... thinking."

"What about?"

Leo really didn't want to talk. Jenny always did the same thing to him too, always forcing him to open up and tear his walls down. Fuck. Now his boyfriend would see him cry too and he was a mess when he cried.

"I was wondering..." Oh, how could he word this? He sighed and let his fingers bury themselves in Dogmeat's fur. "Why do you think Megaton is your home?"

"Well, lots of reasons. I have a house there, it's in the middle of the map, you're there." He smiled, a bright, happy thing. "I mean, sure, I could live here, or in Tenpenny Tower, but I like having you close."

Oh, thank God. He was worried for nothing, wasn't he? He was being selfish and childish, as usual.

"I like having you there too," he said quietly.

His hand brushed Thatchery's hip and he curled his fingers there. He watched Thatchery tip his head back to smile at him, and Leo hesitated, because maybe he shouldn't, maybe Thatchery should have had someone else do this to him. Someone like Gob, just as sweet as Thatchery was. But oh, Thatchery was still insistent on it, if the hands pulling him down into a short kiss were anything to go by, the way Thatchery seemed to relax against him and even sighed into his mouth when he pressed for more.

"Are you sure?" Leo whispered when they pulled apart, because he wanted to be sure. Thatchery was so good, so kind and carefree, and Leo was afraid. Of what, he wasn't so sure.

"Are you?"

Oh, yes. Yes he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my second update in a week. Aren't you proud of me? I'm finally getting over this shitty writer's block.
> 
> This is my [tumblr](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com), for anyone who is feeling brave. Don't be afraid to hit me up; I don't bite hard!


	21. Play It by Ear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harkness kept his eye on the three of them from across the market. He was still keeping an eye on them after the incident with the cars. At least they were getting out of his perfect hair as soon as they were done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I... I think it's too short, but Jesus Christ, I'm tired of looking at it. It's been sitting there since the beginning of May. I'm done.
> 
> I mean, it's not about quantity, it's about quality, right? Maybe it's lacking in both. It's 5AM here. Sorry.

Thatchery wanted to stop for a bit in the market before they left. He said it wouldn't be a bad idea to pick up some food and bottles of water. They stopped at Flak and Shrapnel's too. Leo followed with Dogmeat on a leash just to make sure he didn't cause any trouble. The mutt was still eager though, constantly trying to break away from Leo.

Harkness kept his eye on the three of them from across the market. He was still keeping an eye on them after the incident with the cars. At least they were getting out of his perfect hair as soon as they were done.

"Uh, yeah, I guess I'll take the grenades too," Thatchery said.

"Never know when you'll need 'em," Flak agreed, his gruff voice echoing off the walls.

It was hardly busy in the market before nine o'clock. Thatchery had wanted to leave early for... Well, he hadn't said Megaton. He actually hadn't said where they were headed at all.

"You ready to head out?"

Thatchery was pulling his hair back into a small ponytail. He had bobby pins sticking out of his mouth to pin stray curls back.

"Yeah."

Thatchery pulled the curls back from his eyes and pinned them in place. He was so handsome he hurt to look at. "Great."

Thatchery grabbed Leo's hand, the one not holding onto Dogmeat's leash, as they started walking toward the exit. Dogmeat went as far ahead as his leash permitted, sniffing at everything he could. Leo wondered if they would be taking Dogmeat's leash off outside the city. It would just be easier if they got into a combat situation.

"So, we're going to have a few side stops," Thatchery said halfway across the bridge. "Is that all right?"

"Yeah, it's fine. Megaton will still be standing if we're not back right away."

"Great!" He paused. "But first, how do you feel about the Brotherhood?"  
~  
Leo had never actually been inside the Citadel. No one really had. But it was amazing. Maybe not breathtaking, but what place really was this side of post-apocalyptia?

"So, I'll be honest," Thatchery started, nervously, "I've only been here once. I mean, it was for a couple of days, but I don't know a whole lot about the layout, or where to go, or... Yeah. Bear with me."

"What are we here for?"

"Okay, so I did some thinking the other day, after I told you about the Project?" He led Leo across the courtyard. "And, well, I have unfinished business at the Memorial. Elder Lyons promised me aid for whenever I finish this stupid thing, so we're here for the aid."

"Whoa, hold up." Thatchery turned to look at him. "You're going back there? After they tried to kill you?"

"Yeah. Babe, I have to. I'm the only one who knows the passcode. I'm the only one whose parents actually worked on this damn thing. The others don't know anything." He sighed. "Besides, it just isn't for them to do. I have to finish this."

Leo grit his teeth and looked across the courtyard. Dogmeat had gone off that way and he was sniffing at an open can of beans beside someone. Damn dog. He looked back at Thatchery, who was glaring at him.

"Fine, but I'm going with you."

"Leo—"

"No. If you're going to do this, I'm going with you. You apparently don't have someone to stop you from doing stupid shit."

Thatchery's grin was a mile wide and he kissed Leo quickly. "We can get you power armor training. And a laser rifle."

"I don't need another gun, Thatch."

"Okay, but power armor training. I can get you a suit."

He started chattering away about how he might need it, about how the Enclave was better prepared for war than the Brotherhood was. Without power armor, they didn't stand a chance. Maybe they had a suit to fit Leo's measurements. Thatchery said he would find Leo a suit before they left the Citadel, promised him. Leo didn't care, really. He could do without one. He never needed one before, so why would he need one now?

No one stopped to talk to them inside the lab. There was one woman with her hair cut in a military-esque style, sort of a high buzzcut, that watched them from upstairs, but she didn't seem very intimidating. Not even with her power armor and that super sledge on her back. She seemed to dislike Thatchery too.

"Elder Lyons, sir?" Thatchery asked as he approached a man in a blue robe.

The man turned and his wrinkled face brightened with a smile. "Thatchery! It's so good to see you again!"

"It's good to see you too, sir." He cleared his throat. "I need to request that Paladin Gunny train my partner here to wear power armor. He's going to help us reclaim the Project."

Elder Lyons eyed Leo for a moment. "Very well. I shall send word to Gunny that he is to train this man."

"Thank you, sir." Thatchery stuck his hands into his pockets. "Do you think there's a suit of armor with his measurements? I can pay for it."

The old man shook his head. "Oh, there's no need. I'm sure if I send word, Knight Captain Durga will be more than happy to assist you."

"Thank you, sir."

Thatchery herded Leo back out to the courtyard and to the firing range. Dogmeat bounded up to them and sat patiently at Leo's feet while Thatchery spoke to Gunny. Dogmeat tipped his head back, pressing the side of his face against Leo's leg, and whined softly. Leo appeased him by scratching the top of his head.

"Great, another kid who just gets a free pass," Gunny snapped.

Kid? He hadn't been called kid since he was Thatchery's age, maybe younger. Leo frowned. There wasn't anyone else to teach him this? He already didn't like this Gunny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're actually getting close to the end. I'm a little sad. But I'm like... 93.7% certain their story won't end with this one.
> 
>  
> 
> [It's-a me!](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com)


	22. I Explode

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was nothing for a while, nothing but rusty walls and eerie silence. There were a few skeletons and supplies scattered around. There was a terminal Thatchery sat at and read from while Leo poked around the room. Thatchery didn't glean much from the entries, except that Vault-Tec staff kept the tests a secret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I know what you're all thinking. There isn't enough sex, I know. I'm gonna fix that soon, I promise.
> 
> Also, I haven't played through the main quest in a really long time, so it was all done off of my memory. Sorry. Let me know if something's wrong or whatever and I'll fix it.

The training took the rest of the afternoon. Thatchery watched for a little while, leaning against Dogmeat where they sat under the shade of the shooting range. But he was called away by a blond woman whose hair was pulled tight against her skull sometime after they'd begun. Dogmeat stayed, lazing in the fading sunlight, but Leo couldn't tear his attention away for long.

Leo found Thatchery in the library. He sat in the chair beside him and closed his eyes.

"You all right?"

"Tired."

Thatchery lowered himself into Leo's lap as he continued tapping away at the computer. "So, we have to go for a GECK."

"GECK?"

"Garden of Eden Creation Kit," he explained. "I'm looking at the vault catalog for a list of vaults that were equipped with one."

"We're leaving in the morning then?"

"As soon as we can."  
~  
They didn't take their power armor. They didn't take Dogmeat either. Squire Maxson promised to look after Dogmeat for them. That was a good thing; that poor kid needed some company that wasn't that of an adult.

Leo didn't like Mayor MacCready. He didn't like Little Lamplight. He especially didn't like that the roof could cave in at any moment, right down on top of their heads.

The kids called them mungoes. Some called them big kids, but most, like Mayor MacCready and Princess, called them mungoes. Leo wasn't sure what the hell a mungo was, but he knew that he didn't like being called one.

"You want to go down Murder Pass?" MacCready had asked them. He was no older than twelve, already wielding a rifle and volatile words.

"We need to," Thatchery retorted. "You gonna let us?"

MacCready spit onto the ground. "Talk to Joseph. He can get you in there safer."

Joseph did help them, to the best of his abilities. He thanked Thatchery for rescuing his sister before he even started to repair the terminal. Thatchery and Leo helped him to the best of their abilities, which was really not that much. Neither of them knew a lot about terminals.

"We'll come back through Murder Pass," Thatchery said as he idly cleaned beneath his nails with a switchblade. "We might be able to find some supplies to replenish what we lose in the vault."

"What's in there?"

"Super Mutants, I think. If what the kids here say is true."

Fuck. Leo hated Super Mutants. But they were well armed, they had plenty of supplies. "We'll be fine."

Thatchery grinned. "That's the spirit, babe."

"There you go," Joseph said. He stepped away from the terminal. "Good luck."

Thatchery hacked the terminal, guessing passwords until he could access it. "Okay, so, the GECK is kinda deep in the vault." He hesitated then. "If you wanna stay here, I get it. I mean, this isn't something you have to do."

"I said I'd go with you."

Thatchery ducked his head as a shy smile crawled onto his face. "I, uh, I got the door open. Let's go."

There was nothing for a while, nothing but rusty walls and eerie silence. There were a few skeletons and supplies scattered around. There was a terminal Thatchery sat at and read from while Leo poked around the room. Thatchery didn't glean much from the entries, except that Vault-Tec staff kept the tests a secret.

"Like all the other vaults I've been to," Thatchery sighed. "More tests."

"What tests?" Leo asked.

"I don't know. FEV, maybe." He squeezed Leo's hand briefly. "Come on."

They fought a few greenskins, a lot less than Leo thought there would be. They went down dark corridors and parts where the halls were broken in and revealed the rocky walls of the cave it was built into. They crawled past these, past skeletons and children's play things, to more corridors filled with more Super Mutants and their pets. Leo hated them.

Thatchery muttered something about water in one of the corridors, where they were surrounded by bodies and rifles, while he picked through pockets. "I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I shall give unto him who is athirst of the Waters of Life, freely."

"What was that?"

"My mother's favorite Bible quote. It sparked her dream for clean water." He sighed and handed some bullets to Leo. "My goal now, I guess."

"You don't sound thrilled."

"I'm not. But helping people is the upside."

Leo accepted more bullets that were handed to him. "You don't sound thrilled about that either."

Thatchery stood up and dusted his hands on his thighs. "I just don't think they should have put all of their expectations and trust in me."

"This, what you're doing, is impossible. You've never had an obligation to these people." Shit, he didn't want to have this conversation here, not in the middle of a battlefield. "You're only putting yourself in danger."

"Oh yeah? So what? I could be doing something amazing, something to help this shithole! I could make everyone's lives better! You're just being selfish!" Thatchery always saw right through him, didn't he?

"Of course I'm being selfish! I don't think I'm being selfish enough! I haven't had nearly enough time with you to just let you do this!" Leo felt himself crumbling, the brickwork of his core turning to dust. This was it. He was crying in front of his boyfriend. Fuck. "You just don't love me the way I love you, Thatch."

Thatchery stared at him, dumbfounded. His eyes were wet. "How can you think I'm anything but hopelessly in love with you?"

Leo didn't understand. "What?" Nothing had hinted at that. What was he supposed to say?

Thatchery brushed away Leo's tears with rough thumbs. "Don't look at me like that. You heard me."

Leo wrapped his arms around Thatchery. He pressed his face into Thatchery's neck. Leo inhaled the scent of cigarettes and sweat and citrus soap. "I'm sorry."

"You're a selfish asshole," he muttered, digging his fingers into Leo's neck. It was a sharp, stabbing pain. But then his arms curled around Leo's shoulders, soft and warm and comforting. "But I do love you."

"I love you too, Thatch. I'm sorry."

They stood like that in silence for a while before Thatchery started to push on his chest. "Hey, we have to wrap this up. We're sorta in the middle of green territory."

Leo released him and they grabbed their weapons from the floor. Leo wiped his face on his sleeve, smiling when he caught Thatchery smiling at him. They crept around a corner, alert for anything hostile, when an intercom somewhere ahead of them crackled. Thatchery froze in place, so Leo stopped too.

"You out there," said a gruff voice, static and echoing in the hallway. "Come closer. Please."

The intercom was attached to a room where there was a Super Mutant. It wore a tattered Vault suit and a weary expression. Thatchery glanced around before he stood up straight to be able to press the button to communicate.

"Thatch," Leo whispered as he covered Thatchery's hand over the button. "It could be a trap."

"No! No trap! I swear!"

Thatchery glanced at Leo and back at the mutant. "How can I trust your word?"

The Super Mutant offered a deep and healing scar at his side. "My brothers did this to me. I do not wish to hurt humans!"

"What do you want?"

"To help. You release me and I will help you."

Leo glanced down the hallways as they spoke. He was getting antsy. The vault was still full of Super Mutants and their acid-spitting pets. They could be found at any moment. He didn't have to wonder what would happen to them; the blood trails in the corridors were evidence enough.

"The door release is down the hall. Be cautious; it will open all doors."

Thatchery shifted back down into a crouching position. Leo followed suit and they snuck down the hall. Leo only felt more uneasy the further they went. What if this was all an elaborate trap? What if the Super Mutants were more intelligent than everyone gave them credit for? What if the FEV and the radiation didn't corrupt their brains like everyone thought?

"You're doing it again," Thatchery whispered.

"Doing what?"

"Thinking too hard. I can hear it."

He was exaggerating. But Leo thought maybe he was right. Maybe he was worried over nothing.  
~  
Fawkes was the mutant's name. He promised again that it was no trap, and he offered to walk ahead of them to prove it. But Thatchery said he didn't have to. He believed Fawkes, even if Leo didn't. The last part he didn't say aloud.

"Don't worry," Thatchery said softly as they rummaged through a supply closet. He handed a bottle of pills over to Leo and a couple RadAway packs. "We'll be fine. We're so close."

"Is it worth your life?"

Thatchery exhaled sharply and turned his head to look at him. "What is with you? Why do you keep questioning me?"

"I'm questioning this. We all get along just fine without clean water."

"But you should have it. That way that's the one thing no one has to worry about. I had clean water growing up and no one up here did." He turned his gaze away, toward the rad suit in his hands. "Why are you trying to fight me on this?"

"I want you to be safe. I feel like I can't protect you. Do you have any idea what that's like?"

"No, I don't."

"Every time you leave Megaton, I get scared. I get scared because I know I can't protect you."

"I can protect myself."

"Then you don't understand."

Thatchery lifted his eyes to look across the room to him again. "Maybe I do. But not as often as you do."

He dropped the rad suit back into the crate as he stood up. He went back out into the hallway, where Leo could hear Fawkes ask if everything was all right. Thatchery's response was too soft for Leo to hear.

Leo stuck the remaining supplies into the bag at his hip. He followed Thatchery out and brushed past him when Thatchery shot a glare in his direction.

"The chamber for the GECK is heavily irradiated," Fawkes said in his slow, stilted way. "I will retrieve it for you, for the radiation is not deadly to me."

"Thank you, Fawkes," Thatchery said.

Leo was painfully aware of the silence between them when Fawkes left. But he wasn't going to apologize. He did feel scared when Thatchery left.

"Sorry," Thatchery muttered.

"You're not. You don't have to be."

"And you're not either?"

"Should I be?"

Thatchery smiled wryly at him. "No, I suppose not." He wrapped his arms around Leo, just for a moment before they had to try and navigate a way out of the vault. "You're an idiot," he said quietly.

Leo chortled as he squeezed Thatchery. "Fool."

"Haven't heard that before," he murmured. Leo wasn't sure if he was serious or not.

"Friends!" Fawkes came out of the chamber just as they parted. He was holding something under his arm. He handed it to Thatchery. "Are we ready?"

"Yeah. Let's get outta here."

Leo didn't know why, but he got an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach when they started for the exit. Fawkes explained that the actual vault entrance was too heavily irradiated for Thatchery and Leo to leave through. Thatchery explained that they had another way out as he reached for the door release. Leo wanted to call out to Thatchery to stop, but everything went white and he heard a loud ringing sound as he fell to the floor.

There were men in suits of black armor, power armor with points that looked like ears on the helmets. There was one man, one not wearing power armor, who crouched in front of Thatchery. His hair was silver and his coat was beige.

"No," he heard Thatchery gasp. "You're dead!"

"On the contrary, my dear boy."

"Sir — "

"I know." The man stood. "Gather the boy and the GECK." He glanced at Leo. His eyes were devoid of emotion, cold and calculating. "Leave the others."

The last thing Leo saw was Thatchery being lifted into one of the soldier's arms while another grabbed the GECK.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [It's-a me!](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com)


	23. Fell into Disarray

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo couldn't hear anything that could tell him that someone was near. He knew, somehow, that Thatchery no longer was. But where was Fawkes?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I mean, I know this isn't what y'all were hoping for when I said sex, but it's mentioned just enough that I'm sure you could picture it if you wanted to.

Leo came to on the cold, rusted floor of the vault. There was something soft beneath his head. When he felt it, it was the shirt Thatchery had stuffed into his bag before they'd left the Citadel.

Leo couldn't hear anything that could tell him that someone was near. He knew, somehow, that Thatchery no longer was. But where was Fawkes?

Pain stabbed at the back of his head when he pushed himself into a sitting position. What was that bright light? His skull was about to split open from the blinding of it, even all this time later.

"My friend," Fawkes said softly. He knelt beside Leo. "I'm afraid they took him."

"I know."

Fawkes' face was twisted with worry. "If I depart now, I may be able to catch them."

Leo closed his eyes. The pain blossoming in his skull wasn't going to go away any time soon, but he was going to go with Fawkes. "I'm going with you."

"You are injured, my friend. You should stay somewhere safe."

"No. I have to go with you. I have to know if he's okay." Of course it was a trap. Thatchery never listened to him. Now he had fallen into one, even if it wasn't one Leo expected.

Fawkes nodded after a moment of thought. He stuffed the shirt back into Leo's bag and helped him stand. He wavered on his feet, but he clung to Fawkes' arm until he was able to stand on his own. They departed the vault, weapons drawn and eyes peeled for any danger still lingering.

They trekked for days across the Wasteland. Leo had held their caps in his bag, so they were able to make stops to buy food and water. Fawkes seemed to be carving a pretty straight path across the land, what Leo believed was northwest. He wasn't sure how Fawkes knew where to go, but if it meant finding Thatchery, he didn't care.

"We will find him," Fawkes reassured on the fourth afternoon. He was the one to insist they rest, but Leo hadn't felt that they needed to. "Do not worry."

Leo sighed. He was sick with worry and his heart ached. He twisted the bottle of water in his hands idly, something to keep his hands busy. He was trying not to smoke more than he usually did. It was already a nasty habit.

"I'm worried about what they're doing to him."

Fawkes fell silent. Leo did too. He didn't want to talk anymore. He wanted to move, but since Fawkes was the one who knew where they were headed, he would sit patiently. It wasn't like he had a wide variety of options.

They didn't move again until Leo had eaten something. Fawkes was adamant about him keeping his strength up. They were close, according to Fawkes. The buildings and the rubble of buildings grew sparser the further they went. There were signs of pre-war military activity, a few trucks and barricades lying around.

Fawkes stopped at the foot of a hill. There was a structure up there, an old military base.

"This is it?"

"Yes. I believe this is where his captors — "

A loud, awful cracking sound rent the air, unmistakable in nature. The base was crumbling beneath the force of an explosion. But where was Thatchery? Leo watched the base carefully even as fear unfurled in his heart. Thatchery had to be okay.

Finally, there, emerging from an obscured exit, was a small figure in faded blue. Leo dropped his bag to the dirt and raced toward him. His heart was in his throat. Thatchery stumbled, his body collapsing. Leo caught him before he could hit the dirt.

"Thank God," Leo whispered.

Thatchery pressed his face against Leo's shoulder. His fingers dug sharply into Leo's shoulders where he had his arms wrapped around him. Thatchery was breathing hard.

"How did you find me?"

"Fawkes said he knew where to find the guys who took you."

Thatchery sat back and looked at him. He was sporting a deep cut down the right side of his lower lip and a blackening cheekbone. "You're okay?"

"I'm fine." Leo gently cupped Thatchery's shoulders, his neck, his face. "Are you?"

"Bruises heal." He leaned forward to kiss him gently. "Come here."

Thatchery led him toward a rock overhang that would provide some privacy. Leo's idea of make up sex was not fully clothed, quick, and rough behind a rock while a friendly Super Mutant kept watch in the other direction for hostiles. But if the look Thatchery levelled at him afterwards, as he pulled his hair back from his face, was anything to go by, they would do better later.  
~  
Leo thought about the bruises marking Thatchery's arms and back on the way to Megaton. Dark, wicked bruises that showed only a portion of what they did to Thatchery after they'd taken him. Thatchery didn't want to talk about it. But those bruises haunted Leo.

Fawkes made sure they made it safely to the gates of Megaton three long, tiring days later. He was going to head into the city ruins to Underworld to wait for the both of them to recover and call on him.

"I hope you feel better soon, my friends."

Thatchery smiled, a small lopsided thing that didn't pull too much at his cut. "We'll see you soon, Fawkes."

They went inside the gates as Fawkes went the other direction. Thatchery shuffled slowly, stopping at the bottom of the crater.

"I'm gonna head up to the house," he murmured.

Leo tenderly kissed his forehead. "I'll be at the Lantern."

Thatchery climbed the stairs to his house. Leo watched him until he heard the front door close. Jenny, if not Andy, was probably worried about him. He'd been gone longer than they all thought he would have been.

"So," Jenny started almost as soon as he'd gone inside, "look who finally showed up."

A long sigh escaped his nose as he leaned heavily against the doorway. "Not now, Jen."

"Oh, I think now is a perfect opportunity to let you know just how worried Andy and I have been."

Leo wrapped his hands around her arms and squeezed gently. "I'm sorry. Plans didn't turn out the way they were supposed to."

Jenny sighed. "I just... We worried that something really bad happened." She held Leo's face in her hands. "You and Thatchery, you're okay?"

"Thatchery's a little bruised, but he's okay."

"And you?"

Leo hesitated. He bit his lip, pulling at the chapped skin with his teeth. "Worried."

Jenny gave him what was supposed to be a reassuring smile. It looked more sad than anything. "He'll be okay. He's still got you."

"Yeah."

She dropped her hands, stuffing them into her pockets. "Speaking of, I remember you saying he wasn't your someone."

"Oh, we're gonna do this now?"

She leaned against the counter. "I might not have another chance any time soon."

Leo sighed, but he couldn't smother the smile that rose to his face fast enough. "You know well enough that things change without our say so."

"So, what changed this time?"

"He kissed me."

Jenny's smile was sweet. "You're so lovesick."

"I'm not."

"You are. It's the way you talk about him. You just don't hear it."

"And you do?"

"You think I'm lying to you?"

Leo didn't think his dear little sister could ever lie to him, but she did exaggerate. She liked to tease him and Andy both. And lately, she's been itching to tease him about Thatchery.

"No, I think you're exaggerating just to tease me."

She laughed. "Not at all, my dear brother. I wouldn't lie to you."

"Good, because I'd have to give you a serious talking to."

"Oooh, that sounds terrifying. Are you gonna lecture me on how I shouldn't do my job as a little sister?"

"On how you shouldn't be obnoxious," he corrected, ignoring her indignant squawk. He kissed her forehead. "But right now, I'm gonna go check on him."

She smacked his arm, but it was playful revenge for his words. "Give him space if he needs it."

The crickets were just starting their evening song when Leo went outside. Maggie and Harden were racing up the hill toward Maggie's house. Confessor Cromwell was already inside his people's church for the night, so the night air was quiet. Few people were still outside.

Thatchery wasn't in his home. If Leo hadn't seen him walk up there, hadn't heard the door close, he wouldn't even think Thatchery had actually been inside. Nothing had been disturbed, not even the stock of sugar bombs on the bookcase. The only thing was Thatchery's rifle lying on the sofa.

"Ah, Master Leo! I'm afraid Master Thatchery went outside for a walk. You just missed him!"

"Did he say anything?"

"Uh, no, sir. He seemed of a mood. I had hardly said a word to him before he left the house."

"Thanks, uh..." He struggled for a moment with the name. "Wadsworth."

Leo found Thatchery on the walkway outside of the armory. He had a lit cigarette held loosely between his fingers and his jacket wrapped around his shoulders. They stood in silence leaning against the railing. The town lay quiet beneath them, residents returning home for the night and businesses closing. It was serene, but he could feel Thatchery's pain as if it were his own.

"Would that I could love with all my heart, but I have relinquished to you what remains."

Leo found himself at a loss. "Thatchery — "

"Amata used to write and say beautiful things like that." He took a drag from his cigarette and passed it over. "I only realize now that they weren't just beautiful words strung together."

It struck Leo in that moment that he would never fully understand Thatchery. He would never fully understand his heart. It did not come screaming across his mind, flashing bright behind his eyes. It was a quiet presence, like that of the stars in the sky or the radiation lingering.

It pained him.

Thatchery chuckled softly, angrily even. "I haven't given you everything you deserve. I don't know if I can. The universe is hard enough to wrap with pretty paper, and how the hell am I supposed to find a bow for something as grand as that?"

Leo flicked the cigarette filter away. "The universe is nothing without the sun to light it."

Thatchery looked at him finally. His eyes were red. "You could be a poet."

"Give me enough paper and I could fill a bookshelf." He gently grasped Thatchery's chin in his hand, carefully touching the dried blood on his lip. "More than one, maybe."

"With me as a muse? Maybe just one book. That might even be stretching it."

Leo shook his head. "It pains me to see how self-depreciative you are."

Thatchery's tongue darted out, making the scab glisten in the brightening twilight. The tip brushed Leo's thumb briefly. "Makes me a masterpiece, doesn't it?"

Leo moved his hand to cup his cheek. "I guess so."

Thatchery pulled the jacket tighter around himself. "I wanna go back to my house. I... I just want to sleep."

"Yeah."

Thatchery grabbed his hand from his face. He led Leo down the walkways toward his house, past houses with lights still on and some without. Wadsworth turned off the house's lights when Thatchery and Leo had gotten up the stairs to the bedroom and the door was shut firmly behind them. Thatchery curled up against him, sleeping in almost nothing. Leo could see his bruises even in the dark, and he fell asleep dreaming of his hands around the throat of whoever did that to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are still appreciated!
> 
>  
> 
> [It's-a me!](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com)


	24. I'll Use You as a Focal Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thatchery's face darkened, but he didn't offer an excuse or explanation. He wouldn't tell Leo about it, so why would he tell this asshole?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it seems like I'm churning these out without much of a thought to them, but it's summer and I literally have nothing better to do.
> 
> Also, we're nearing the end!

Leo woke up alone. He wasn't sure how late it was, but the room temperature was warm enough to pass for late morning or early afternoon. Thatchery had taken his Pip-Boy and the jacket he'd put over the back of his desk chair with him. And Leo's shirt, apparently.

Leo found another one of his shirts tucked beneath the bed while he was putting his pants on. Thatchery was hoarding them like most people hoarded caps or ammo. Where did he even get them? Leo hadn't really left a shirt there that he could remember.

As he opened the door, fully clothed even though the shirt he found stashed away smelled like it could use a wash, he heard soft voices downstairs. One was definitely Thatchery's, and the other one was familiar. The second person stopped talking the moment he heard Leo's footsteps on the stairs.

"Hey sleepyhead," Thatchery said gently.

"Hey baby," Leo replied. The second person was Butch, a cigarette hanging from his lips. It wasn't lit yet. "Butch."

"Hi-ya Rusty," Butch said around the filter in his mouth. He turned his attention back to Thatchery. "Like I was sayin', now would be a good time. They'd never suspect you," he said when Leo moved toward the kitchen nook. Butch lit his cigarette and continued. "Sure, they know you're comin', but they won't expect it right away. They'll think you're recuperatin' or somethin'."

"But I am."

"You ain't got anythin' to recover from, T. You're just bruised."

"Injuries can exist on the inside, Butch."

"What, they hurt your feelings?"

Thatchery's face darkened, but he didn't offer an excuse or explanation. He wouldn't tell Leo about it, so why would he tell this asshole?

"Maybe you're right," Thatchery muttered.

"Wait," Leo said. They both looked at him. "You're going back to the purifier? After what happened a few days ago?"

"Maybe. I mean, Butch might be onto something. They probably aren't expecting me to show up there so soon after what happened at Raven Rock."

"Do you really think that's such a good idea?"

"No, but it might be the best we have."

Leo felt panic bubble up in his chest, clogging his throat. This was probably the stupidest thing Thatchery had ever considered doing. He could get himself killed.

They talked about their plans like he wasn't there anymore, like he'd vanished into thin air. Thatchery didn't seem to care about what Leo was thinking. And maybe he shouldn't. He had his own decisions to make. His own life to lead. Leo's voice shouldn't give weight to his thoughts.  
~  
They returned to the Citadel with Butch in tow. Squire Maxson was in the Bailey with Dogmeat, prancing around with a rifle too big for him in his small arms.

"That rifle doesn't work, does it?" Thatchery asked.

"N-No, sir," Maxson stuttered.

Thatchery ruffled the boy's hair. "Someday soon, you will hold one that does. And I will call you 'sir', and you will be Elder, Art."

"I don't wanna wear those blue skirts," Maxson pouted.

"We all have to do things we don't want to. But you grow into it." Thatchery gave him a smile that was more sad than anything else before he stood up. He pet Dogmeat very briefly before he started for the lab once more.

Thatchery met with the necessary people for his and Butch's plans; Scribe Rothchild, Sentinel Lyons, Elder Lyons, and a few Scribes Leo had never learned the names of. They all spoke of the purifier, even Butch, but Leo knew nothing about it. He had never been to the site himself. There had been nothing worth scavenging before Thatchery's father had gone back to it, so he'd left well enough alone.

As Leo stood against a metal support beam, watching the plotting group with something that might be called contempt, he caught sight of the woman he saw the last time he was in the Citadel. The woman with the short graying hair. She was watching the group too from the second floor, namely Thatchery, her face twisted with something Leo might have called anger. If she kept watch over him like a bitter babysitter, then he would ask her why.

"Hello," she said when he approached. She seemed to be someone who didn't inflict her anger upon those undeserving. She didn't straighten from where she leaned over the railing.

"Why do you watch him?"

She glanced at him. "How close are you with him?"

"Would you ignore me if I said 'very'?"

She shook her head. "On the contrary, I would ask something of you."

Leo leaned against the railing too, but facing the opposite direction. He pulled out his cigarettes, placed one between his lips. "Sure."

"Has he mentioned his father?"

Leo watched the flame of his lighter flicker for a moment, felt the warmth against his face. "Only briefly."

"What has he said?"

"Nothing good."

Her grip tightened on the railing, just enough to make it creak ominously. "He is wrong. His father was a great man, honorable and kind. He blasphemes."

"From what he's told me, his dad wasn't that great of a man. He was neglectful and verbally abusive."

"Then you had not known the man either."

They stood in silence for a long time. Leo could hear conversation from below drifting upwards, echoing off of the walls. He didn't want to listen.

_"The Enclave remaining at the purifier are holding it even tighter since the destruction of their base,"_ Rothchild said. _"They called in another vertibird just two days ago. They won't make it easy."_

_"I know. I think we can handle it,"_ Thatchery said. 

_"We all hope so."_

"Who are you?"

Leo glanced at her, surprised. He hadn't really expected further conversation. "I'm Leo Stahl."

"No, I meant..." She lowered her voice. "I meant to him."

"Good question."

In all honesty, Leo wasn't entirely sure what Thatchery wanted to call their relationship. Partners, maybe, but that implied a sharing of secrets and ideas and plans. No, they weren't partners. Boyfriends, maybe. It had a childlike sound to it. Their entire relationship seemed childish at times. But Thatchery was still sort of a child, wasn't he? He was hardly old enough to be traipsing around the Wasteland alone with a rifle almost as big as himself and an entire bottle of scotch.

"I don't know," he answered finally. "We share a bed, hold each other, offer comfort, but I don't know."

The woman was silent for a long time. "Despite my dislike of him, I can see that he is a good man. You would do well to fight for him."

"I wish I could convince myself of that."  
~  
"My birthday is next week," Thatchery whispered.

Elder Lyons had offered up a room, and while it was cramped, it was private. Thatchery had stayed and talked about the plans for hours, well into the evening, with those that could make it happen. Leo was left to his own devices during the time. He had used the day to play with young Arthur and Dogmeat, to pretend that he had nothing to worry about, even if it was just for an afternoon.

Arthur had been a delight. He was well-mannered and educated. He told Leo stories he'd heard of his ancestors and their victories with such animation. He asked Leo if he had stories too, when he tired of telling his own. Leo did, but not as many. Most of them were things he would rather not be telling a child.

"What day?"

"The thirteenth." Thatchery put his hand against Leo's chest, his fingers curled. He was sleepy. "The day we go for the purifier."

"Thatchery — "

"Wait." Oh, he wasn't done. Far from it, if Leo knew anything about him. "I know you only want what's best for me, but I have to do this. My legacy, my father's legacy, is this project."

"You didn't love him."

Thatchery's swallow was audible. "Maybe not. But I loved my mother. This is her legacy too. The idea came from her. I have to protect it."

"You're protecting the fevered dream of a madwoman."

"Maybe you don't understand."

Leo wanted so desperately to hear, in Thatchery's own words, that everything would turn out okay. That he wouldn't be hurt. But he knew that such a promise was like promising that the Wasteland would be green again. It was uncertain. So Leo dug his fingers into Thatchery's flesh as tears stung his eyes.

"Maybe I don't." He kissed Thatchery's head. "So, your birthday."

"Yeah. Twenty-one years."

"Mine is in September. The exact day of yours."

He felt Thatchery's smile against his throat, but it was all wrong. He was fighting his own tears. "Really?"

"Yeah."

"We'll have to celebrate, since we won't get to with mine, huh?"

He swallowed hard against the tears clogging his throat. "Yeah. We will."

Leo didn't sleep, not much anyways. Thatchery did. He was tired after the long walk, after the long afternoon discussing plans. But he could sleep under almost any condition, and in a warm bed with Leo beneath him was the easiest to fall asleep in. Normally, Leo would follow him, but he was scared of the unpredictable. He was scared of the battle to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are still appreciated!  
>  
> 
> [It's-a me!](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com)


	25. Fortune Favors Not the Young

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo felt his heart thumping a little bit painfully in his chest, both a war song and a fearful tune. He was sure Thatchery's heart was doing the same. "I'm scared too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It felt fitting to post it today, being a certain someone's birthday and all. I finished it early this morning over my second cup of coffee.

Leo woke in the early morning hours of the thirteenth, when Thatchery tried to steal away from the bed. Thatchery hadn't wanted to wake him yet, but he had stuff to do before Leo even had to be awake. He reached out for Thatchery before he could leave.

"Happy birthday," Leo said quietly.

"Thank you." Thatchery kissed him. He was anchored for the moment by Leo's hands. "I think you'll be the only person to say it."

"Pity."

Leo kept him in bed at least an hour, with soft touches and gentle words, a present when he had no way to get him one in the Citadel. They stayed in bed for at least an hour after that, talking about anything but the battle. Neither of them wanted to make the other upset or uncomfortable.

The week leading up to this day was hard. There were so many preparations to be done. Leo saw more of Arthur Maxson that week than he did of Thatchery Higgins. It was frustrating.

Thatchery pulled away from Leo's embrace after some time. He started to dress, still talking about power armor. Leo watched him with a smile, tugging him close when Thatchery sat on the edge of the bed.

"You'll be right beside me, right?"

"Of course." Leo kissed him. "Where else would I be?"

"Here," he whispered. "I'm sorry. I know you don't want to do this."

"I don't want you to do this." He tucked a curl behind Thatchery's ear. "I'm the only one who seems to care about you and not what you're doing."

"I know. I appreciate having you here, Leo."

Leo kissed him again, a lot slower and softer. "I know."

"We should go finish preparations. You have a suit of armor to try out." He kissed Leo's forehead. "Come on."

Thatchery looked like a gallant knight in his suit of power armor. It made him taller than even Leo, and strong enough to lift him up too. Thatchery was happy and smiling on his twenty-first birthday, and that was what mattered.

Leo had his own suit of armor that Thatchery helped him into. It fit snugly, insulated against the weather, and lay heavy across his shoulders and draped over his body. He released a deep breath as he tried to remember his training.

They followed behind the Lyons' Pride as they started to make their way out of the bailey. They were all armed with rifles, most laser, from the armory and helmets on their heads. The ground rumbled beneath them as the center of the bailey opened up. Liberty Prime, the project Thatchery and the Scribes had devoted late nights to, would be joining them in retaking the purifier.

Dogmeat was left under Maxson's care back in the Citadel. Thatchery was worried that the dog would be trampled beneath Liberty Prime's feet. He was worried that any of them could be; Liberty Prime's only objective was to eliminate the 'Communist' branded Enclave at the purifier, not watch its feet for any allies that wandered too close.

Thatchery was whispering to himself as they left the Citadel. He didn't have his helmet on yet, so his words weren't amplified, but Leo remembered Thatchery saying something about faith all those months ago. He was praying, just low enough that no one would hear him. When Leo looked into his face, he could see how terrified Thatchery was.

"Hey," Leo whispered once he was sure Thatchery was finished.

Thatchery gave him a weak smile, one that was supposed to be reassuring but fell miserably short. "Sorry. I, uh, I remembered something my dad told me about praying before facing something that terrified me."

Leo felt his heart thumping a little bit painfully in his chest, both a war song and a fearful tune. He was sure Thatchery's heart was doing the same. "I'm scared too."

They pulled their helmets on and followed the Lyons' Pride outside. Liberty Prime moved ahead of them all, firing bright beams of blue fire at the Enclave that had swarmed outside. They aided with their own rifles too. Thatchery's plasma was distractingly bright against the brown of the dirt and the black of the Enclave suits, distinctly green against all the reds of their own rifles.

It was a bloody battle all the way from the front gate of the Citadel to the purifier. They lost Knight Captain Dusk on the bridge, and they almost lost Colvin too. The Enclave was giving it all they had, the Lyons' Pride too, but it somehow didn't seem like it was enough. Leo had a feeling in the pit of his stomach that something was going to go wrong. He couldn't shake it.

They stopped outside the purifier in the quiet yard to reload their weapons. Liberty Prime's mission was complete at this point, but it was to survey the yard with any not going inside for any reinforcements the Enclave could possibly have left.

"Anyone who hasn't had their fill of blood, follow me!" Sarah called.

Thatchery followed because he had to, and Leo with him because he promised he wouldn't leave Thatchery's side. Only Gallows went inside with them, his rifle cradled in his arms. He brought up the rear.

The inside wasn't as full of Enclave as they all thought it would be, not the way it should have been. Still, that uneasy feeling gripped Leo's gut even tighter, clenched at his heart the further they went. He wanted to turn back, to tell Thatchery, but Thatchery would tell him that it was fine. He might even have been imagining it because of how eerie the place was.

Inside the rotunda, Thatchery stopped and stood stock-still. There was a man in a beige coat flanked by two soldiers wielding heavy weapons. No, not just any man in a beige coat, _the_ man in a beige coat. The one who kidnapped Thatchery and stole the GECK, the one who gave Thatchery all those nasty bruises that even now still marred his skin.

"It can't be," Thatchery whispered, his voice weirdly amplified in his helmet. He hit the release and pulled it off. His eyes were as wide as dinner plates. "You're dead, right? There's no way you... no way you could have survived the explosion..."

"On the contrary, my dear boy, there are a multitude of ways one can survive such a thing. As intelligent as you have proven to be, you didn't know the layout of Raven Rock. There were many escape routes."

"But you... you chased me down the hall..."

"I knew what you were going to convince our dear president to do, boy. I just managed to escape beforehand."

Thatchery's helmet fell to the marble floor with a loud clatter. Leo could see his hands shaking as he drew his rifle. The rest of them trained their weapons on each other. "You think I wanted to kill all of you? There were innocent people down there! They're dead now too! Because of you!"

"Because of you, dear boy. All you had to do was give me the code for this here purifier. And you will now."

"You're lying! You wouldn't have let me go home! I know your kind!"

"You know nothing!" the man snapped. "All you have done is undermine _years of progress_ with your childish notions of fresh water for all and equality amongst the good people of this here land and its _monsters_!"

"You're the only monster I've seen!"

Sarah whispered softly to Gallows, who gave her a curt nod and left the rotunda. Leo saw the first tear roll down Thatchery's cheek then, as his finger trembled over the trigger.

"We do not have time for this, boy! Give me the code!"

"I'd rather die!"

"Then you shall have your wish!"

The soldiers flanking the man opened fire, but their aim was poor with their oversized weapons. Thatchery unloaded his plasma cartridge into the beige coat, killing him before his pistol could even be drawn. He jumped at one of the armored soldiers with a knife drawn and stabbed her in the neck, where the armor was gapped. Blood sprayed from her wound onto Thatchery and the wall of the water tank before she crumpled to the floor. Sarah and Leo managed the other one while Thatchery knelt and sobbed.

He was a dark, violent creature, but still somehow more beautiful than anything Leo had seen on this earth.

"Are you okay?" Leo asked softly.

Thatchery sniffled and pulled uselessly at the glove on his hand. He stood and hit the release to climb down out of the suit. He wiped his sleeve over his face then. "I'm fine. I... I'm tired, Leo. I'm so tired."

Leo wrapped his arms around Thatchery, awkward and cold because of the layer of steel between them. He understood the feeling. "I know," he murmured.

"Can you climb out of your suit? I just... Just for a minute...?"

"Uh, sure."

Leo hit the release inside his suit and stepped out the back. Thatchery pressed himself into Leo's chest, his arms looping up around Leo's shoulders. His Pip-Boy dug sharp into Leo's shoulder blade, but he held Thatchery even closer. He needed this just as bad as Thatchery did.

"You know, I never could figure out why you decided on me," Leo murmured.

Thatchery snorted. He rubbed his face against Leo's shirt. "Because you were nice to me when everyone else only wanted me for what they could get. That's the only reason I even helped you of my own accord. The only reason I fell for a square like you."

"Oh, a square?"

"Maybe a — "

"Gentlemen," Sarah said sharply. They broke their embrace to look at her. Leo could hear that Li woman's voice over the intercom, shrieking about an explosion. "One of us needs to get in there and activate that. Li says it'll explode."

"I'll do it," Thatchery said. He didn't sound scared or hesitant, not like most men. Leo was sure all the men outside would have cowed at the thought. Hell, he knew he would. "It's mine to do."

"No," Leo said. "I can't let you."

"You don't have a choice. I'm doing this." He cupped Leo's face in his hands, warm despite the chill of the room, the cold of his rifle. "I'm not afraid of death."

"But I am. I'm scared of losing you, too."

Thatchery kissed him, putting as much tenderness into it as he could muster. He put his hand over Leo's heart, the Quantum pendant beneath his shirt. "I'll always be with you."

 _"You have to do it now!"_ Li screamed. _"It's going to explode if you don't do it right now!"_

Thatchery took a breath. "'I am alpha and omega,'" he began as he entered the chamber. "'The beginning and the end.'" He punched in the code. "'I will give unto him that is athirst of the waters of life, freely.'" He pressed enter.

There was a rumbling sound. For just a moment, everything was okay. But then the chamber sealed itself automatically and Thatchery began to dry heave.

Leo always thought that if he saw someone he loved on the brink of death that he would gain some super strength, some incredible ability to snatch that person from death's grasp. But nothing happened. It wasn't like it was in books, where he knew exactly how to open the airlock and save Thatchery from death. He was just frozen, watching Thatchery stagger back and collapse, watching him vomit onto the floor as all the color drained from his face.

Leo had never been so fucking terrified in all his life.

No. No, Leo was selfish. Thatchery said himself that he wasn't afraid of death. But Leo was. He was terrified of losing Thatchery, too. Justifiably so. He didn't have much in this world. Losing Thatchery would mean his own death as well. It would mean losing himself.

Where was his courage, the courage that was supposed to overtake him in a moment like this? How could this be happening?

There was a sudden bright light and a sort of humming noise. Leo couldn't see anything, but he heard Sarah hit the floor just before he did.

Leo didn't come to until they were already pulling Thatchery's body out of the chamber, doing what he couldn't. They lifted Sarah as well, and helped Leo out to a vertibird where he sat by Thatchery's side on the way to the Citadel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, folks. The end is within sight.
> 
>  
> 
> Comments and kudos are still appreciated!
> 
>  
> 
> [It's-a me!](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com)


	26. I Love You, But I Hate Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What would they tell him? That he couldn't sit by the side of his dying boyfriend? No, they couldn't tell him that. They could hardly look him in the eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Wow, I've been sorta neglectful, huh? I just haven't really been able to write lately. But I'm finally about to finish this garbagio. I love it, it's my baby, but I'm sick of looking at it already.

Thatchery had an IV drip of RadAway hooked up to his arm to scrub the radiation from his DNA, to repair the damage to his cells. He was glowing green, his nose and lips bright in the dark room. He looked worse than when he had been helping Moira. He looked like he might die.

Leo was scared that he would.

Elder Lyons let him stay as long as he wanted to by Thatchery's side, and he was allowed meals that he hardly touched. No one said anything when he smoked in the hall outside the clinic. What would they tell him? That he couldn't sit by the side of his dying boyfriend? No, they couldn't tell him that. They could hardly look him in the eyes.

Little Arthur Maxson came by, often with Dogmeat at his heels. He kept Leo company even when he didn't want any, but Leo couldn't really push him away. Arthur was a sweet kid. He only wanted for those around him to smile.

"Will he wake up?" Arthur asked one afternoon.

Leo closed his eyes. He was sitting beside Thatchery's bed, his elbows propped up on his knees and his hands folded against his mouth. "I don't know," he whispered.

"Can we do anything?"

"I think Sawbones has done what it can."

Arthur came by often to see Sarah, who was lying on a cot less than ten feet away from Thatchery. She was also in a coma, though she looked a whole lot better than Thatchery did. She wasn't nearly as pale, and at least she hadn't been severely exposed to radiation.

Thatchery's skin was chapped when Leo reached out to stroke his cheek. His breath was so shallow that sometimes, late at night, Leo was afraid he'd stopped breathing.

Thatchery took a sudden sharp breath through his cannula and his lashes fluttered a little. Leo brought Thatchery's hand to his lips and kissed his knuckles. Elder Lyons had broken the news to him that Sawbones was not sure if either Thatchery or Sarah would make it. It had been hard for the old man to say it, because that was his daughter and she meant so much to him. But it had been so hard to hear. Leo had broken down finally, in front of someone he hardly knew and who hardly knew how to comfort him. He and Elder Lyons had sat in silence for a while, grieving for those they hadn't quite lost yet.

Thatchery grunted softly. Leo opened his eyes to see Thatchery's fluttering open. Leo started, moved his chair closer after a moment. Thatchery didn't look at him right away, his gaze flickering around the dimly lit room. He pushed a soft sigh through his nose and turned his head to look up into Leo's face.

"Hi," he whispered. His voice was painfully hoarse, rasping in the quiet of the room.

Leo chuckled softly as his eyes stung with tears. "Hey you."

"Mm, what happened?"

"Um, I'm not entirely sure, but I heard your Pip-Boy going nuts after you activated the purifier, and there was a bright light that knocked Sentinel Lyons and I out. One of the Scribes explained that I wasn't in a coma because I had stepped out of my suit."

Thatchery made a soft noise and turned his head to look at the foot of his bed, where Dogmeat had curled up for a nap. "Is she okay?"

"We weren't even sure you would be." He cleared his throat. "Sawbones doesn't think so..."

He looked at his arm, where there was a tube connected to the needle in his skin. His forehead crinkled. "IV?"

"You don't feel it?" Thatchery frowned in confusion. "You're sick. There was a lethal dose of radiation. No one's sure how you survived."

Thatchery raised his hand, the one not grasped firmly between Leo's, to cup Leo's face. His thumb lightly stroked the bandage covering the stitches on his cheekbone. "You're okay?"

Leo leaned into his touch. He'd missed it so much. "Just a cut. I hit a jagged piece of metal when I was knocked out."

Thatchery cleared his throat softly and shifted on the bed. "But you're... okay, right?"

"I will be. I was scared."

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

Leo squeezed his fingers. "It's fine, Thatch. Can I get you anything?"

"Actual food would be nice. Have I even had any nutrition in the time I was out?"

Leo smiled, the first real one in almost two weeks. "I'll see what I can do."

Leo left him, and heard Arthur chattering to Thatchery before he'd even gotten far. He found the kitchen easily and found a Scribe inside. She was rooting around through a crate, but she put that aside once she heard Leo shuffle inside.

"Can I help you?"

"Uh, Thatchery asked for some food, but I haven't been in here before."

She opened one of the three refrigerators lining the far wall and produced a large bowl full of some sort of stew. She ladled some into a smaller bowl and handed it to Leo. She handed him a spoon too.

"This stuff is amazing," she said. "He should be able to keep this down."

"Thanks."

Leo grabbed a bottle of water from the counter too and stuck it in his back pocket. He went back the way he came, past Knights and Scribes who were too busy to pay him any mind. He found Arthur on his way out when he came back, being pulled away by a Scribe that was probably his mentor.

Leo set the bowl down on a small table beside Thatchery's bed to help him sit up. He propped Thatchery up with plenty of pillows before handing him the stew. "Here you go."

Thatchery started eating, almost inhaling the stew. Leo pulled the bottle from his pocket and occupied his chair again. That was when he noticed the paper label. The Brotherhood had taken empty bottles and filled them with the fresh water being purified from the Memorial. They'd slapped their own labels on them too.

Thatchery was nearly finished with his food in only five minutes. They'd been feeding him liquid Instamash through a tube for the last two weeks, but he was still malnourished and starving. It had only really been enough to keep him alive, nothing more.

"You cook like, a thousand times better," Thatchery said around a mouthful of the thick stew. "But thank you for finding it."

"I found this, too." Leo handed him the bottle of water. "You're probably thirsty."

Thatchery took the bottle and uncapped it. His hands were shaking, just barely noticeable in the dimly lit room. "You're the best, you know that?"

"I try."

He drained almost half of the bottle. He made a face when he pulled it away from his lips. "This tastes different than I remember."

Thatchery looked at the bottle. He stared at the Brotherhood symbol on the paper for a few moments before he ripped the label off of the bottle. He crumpled it up and held it tight in his palm, his fingers curled around it in his lap. He looked like he was going to cry.

Leo covered Thatchery's hand with one of his own. They didn't speak. The first tear started its descent down Thatchery's cheek and Leo reached up to wipe it away.

"They're going to sell this," Thatchery muttered finally. He was trembling with anger. "They aren't going to give it to people in need. They're going to ask for caps and shove away anyone who can't pay." He snorted, his nostrils flaring as more tears came, welling up in his eyes like a fountain. "This isn't what my parents wanted... This isn't what I wanted..."

"Maybe you can talk to Elder Lyons about it. He can do something."

"But will he?"

Leo's mouth opened and closed for a moment, trying to find the words. "I-I dunno. You'd have to ask."

Thatchery finished his dinner in silence. He didn't touch the water after that, thrusting it out towards Leo to do something with it.  
~  
Leo sat outside in the courtyard in the early morning hours. Thatchery had finally gotten to sleep, after Leo relented to his insistence and sang quietly for him. He'd talked about his mother before that, about things his father had told him about her and pictures he'd seen. He talked about his father too, said that if he recovered from this, he wanted to visit his grave at the purifier.

This early in the morning, there was no one awake. The sun was just beginning his ascent into the sky, the moon having lowered herself already. It gave him some space to think in the peace and quiet.

He lit a cigarette, shielding the lighter's flame from the morning breeze, and inhaled deeply. He was told that this wasn't his fault; Knight Captain Gallows was often visiting Sarah, after nearly everyone had retired for the night. Gallows never said much, not even to Sarah, but he must have heard what Leo was whispering to the unconscious Thatchery. He was the one to say they couldn't really blame anyone.

Leo glanced at the cigarette. He watched the paper burn for a little while before he took another drag. He sighed and let his head hit against the concrete wall. He had this nagging feeling at the back of his throat, however, a feeling of guilt, tearing up his guts and his heart. He just felt like he hadn't done everything in his power to pull Thatchery from the chamber, away from the radiation.

Another drag warmed his lungs, tickled the back of his throat. The nicotine made his muscles relax, made him feel sleepy. He would curl against Thatchery's side now that he'd woken up. He hadn't slept in a bed in two weeks. His back ached from that damn chair.

The filter scorched his fingers, but he still held it a while longer. Leo forced another drag and stamped the butt out beneath his boot. He was exhausted, and making himself feel guilty wasn't helping. He rubbed his eyes. If he was lucky, if he ran into no one in the halls, he would be asleep in less than ten minutes. If he was lucky, he wouldn't wake Thatchery when he went to bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are still appreciated!
> 
> [It's-a me!](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com)


	27. When the Sun is Climbing Window Sills

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was early morning, with morning birds beginning their song and the town beginning to wake. They walked hand in hand toward the gates with Dogmeat at their heels, the impassive face of Stockholm above them and the blank, weathered face plate of Deputy Weld outside. Leo hadn't thought he'd be so happy to see Megaton again. Thatchery seemed to be too, with the way he seemed to relax. He took his hand from the pistol on his hip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is it! The last chapter! This whole story was... dragged out, but not the way I wanted it to be. I hope y'all enjoyed and don't worry, there's more Thatchery/Leo stuff being written!

The yard outside of the purifier was busy, with Scribes and Knights alike bustling about taking inventory and loading Brahmin with crates of water. Butch and Dogmeat were there with Squire Maxson. Butch was causing trouble for the Scribes, as always, while Maxson nervously tried to stop him. Dogmeat was causing trouble of his own for the Knights, who almost tripped over him numerous times while he was sniffing around.

At the edge of the yard, near the steep banks of the water, were two small wooden crosses sticking out of the muddy soil. The mounds of dirt were indicative of bodies; the dirt of one was fresher than the other. Thatchery stood before them both with a cigarette in his mouth. Leo stood just behind him.

"We bury our dead alive, don't we?" Thatchery asked bitterly. He threw his cigarette to the ground and stamped it out. He stuck his hands into the pockets of his jacket.

"What do you mean?"

Thatchery sniffled. "It's like I can still hear him, y'know? Scolding me for being a fucking idiot. But telling me he's proud, too." He rubbed his nose. "That was one of the last things he told me. Probably the only time I ever heard him say it."

Leo reached forward and squeezed Thatchery's shoulder. "I'm sorry."

Thatchery shook his head. "Don't be." His voice dropped to a trembling whisper. "You didn't kill him. You weren't the shitty person he was, either."

Leo sighed, a sharp exhalation through his nose, as he tugged Thatchery to him. He wrapped his arms around Thatchery and felt the blond sag in his arms. Thatchery's sob was muffled in Leo's chest. "I know," he murmured against Thatchery's scalp.

Thatchery was clinging to Leo's upper arms to keep himself standing. Sawbones had deemed him healthy enough to leave the Citadel's infirmary. But he was still so weak, so pale and fragile that Leo was still afraid.

"I want to go home," Thatchery mumbled, his voice thick with the syrup of his tears.  
~  
They made it back to Megaton in four days with as many breaks as Leo dared to force Thatchery into. Thatchery insisted that they travel through the night, and much to Leo's chagrin, they did. But Thatchery seemed fine, especially once the tattered metal walls of Megaton came into view on the horizon.

It was early morning, with morning birds beginning their song and the town beginning to wake. They walked hand in hand toward the gates with Dogmeat at their heels, the impassive face of Stockholm above them and the blank, weathered face plate of Deputy Weld outside. Leo hadn't thought he'd be so happy to see Megaton again. Thatchery seemed to be too, with the way he seemed to relax. He took his hand from the pistol on his hip.

"I can't wait to go inside," Thatchery said. "I missed my bed."

Leo chuckled. "Me too."

Thatchery stopped before they reached the gate. He wasn't looking ahead, but off to the west of the walls. Leo could see someone standing there, but he couldn't make out their face.

"Come with me," Thatchery mumbled.

They went west toward the figure, who started heading towards them in turn. The stranger broke into a run, and it was then that Leo saw who it was. It was the kid from the vault. He didn't seem to want to avoid Thatchery now.

"Oh my god, Thatchery!"

Freddie looked like he had just crawled out of an actual hole in the ground. Dirt smudged his face and his hair was ruffled, his jumpsuit rumpled and his boots scuffed. 

"Freddie? What the hell happened?"

Freddie swallows hard. "I-I dunno. I just... Almost everyone's gone. Susie's taken on a caravan, Butch left, Old Lady Palmer... I..."

"How is Amata?"

"Good. She- She's good. Stressed, I guess, managing the vault, the... the caravans the others have..." Freddie glanced around, at the Megaton walls, at Deputy Weld. His eyes landed on Leo, his gaze fixed on his face. "I, uh... I left, too. My dad didn't think it was a good idea, but if you could do it..."

Thatchery frowned at him. "You're not me, Freddie. I... I've been shooting a gun since I was ten, I wrestled Amata since we were seven. You didn't."

"Susie didn't. She's got her own caravan, a successful one. She was worse off than me."

Leo didn't like the way Freddie's eyes kept darting to their joined hands. He made Leo bristle, just at the thought of what his leaving might mean for them.

"Megaton isn't taking any new residents," Thatchery said slowly. "If you want, I can set something up with the next caravan that passes through to get you safely to Rivet City. Butch is there."

Freddie's eyes darted to Thatchery's. "Yeah? You'd do that?"

"Sure. I'd feel pretty shitty if I knew that someone innocent died because I didn't try to help."

A smile broke across Freddie's face. "I... Thank you. I know I was real shitty to you and... And I don't deserve for you to help me at all and..." He sucked in a lungful of dusty air. "Thank you."

"Megaton's common house might have a bed for you to sleep in, at least for a few nights. And I can find you when the caravan's ready to take you."

Freddie nodded. "Yeah, that... that's fine." He glanced at the gates. "I think I... I should head inside. Thank you, really. I..." His eyes flitted to Leo's and back. "I-I wish you two the best of luck."

Freddie took off toward the gate. He didn't look back at them, but Leo still kept his grip tight on Thatchery's hand.

"What?" Thatchery asked.

"I don't trust him," Leo admitted softly. He was ashamed of himself for being jealous of someone Thatchery didn't even want anymore. But he was worried that Thatchery would pick something familiar over him. "I don't want you to change your mind about us..."

Thatchery shook his head. "That's stupid. I wouldn't want him for all the caps in the world."

Leo stared hard at him. He couldn't find any reason Thatchery would lie to him, but Freddie was _familiar to him._ If given a choice, people almost always chose something familiar. And Thatchery had nothing familiar in his life anymore.

Finally, Leo sighed and lowered his eyes. "I've already almost lost you so many times..."

"You won't lose me like this. That's in my past. He's in my past." He smiled. "You're the only one in my future, dummy."

Leo returned the smile. He didn't know why he doubted Thatchery. They went inside the gates and Thatchery steered him in the direction of the Lantern. Jenny would be upset with them if they didn't stop in before heading to the house for some much-needed sleep.

In a week or so, they'd be heading back to the Citadel to accompany Liberty Prime and a team of soldiers in the eradication of the last of the East coast's Enclave. Thatchery would put himself in harm's way another time for ungrateful assholes then, but for now, he would stay home and regain his strength. For now, they could forget that he almost died.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank so much for all the comments and kudos you guys! There will definitely be more of these two in the very near future too!
> 
> Comments and kudos are still appreciated!
> 
> [It's-a me!](http://almosthuman-butnotquite.tumblr.com)


End file.
